Help me cleanse myself

[Insomnibrat]

Hello all, I'm currently trying to work through the aftermath of what I am coming to realise was an emotionally abusive and controlling relationship. It's very hard and I'm struggling with not blaming myself, and trying to sort it all logically in my mind.
Last night I wrote a letter to myself of all the unpleasant things which have gone on so I can read it back if I ever falter but I still have a tie I can't seem to break, emotionally, to this man.
I was thinking some sort of cleansing ceremony might help, maybe disposing of some of the trinkets of the relationship and help bring closure.
Have any of you had experience with this sort of thing or have you any ideas of the sort of thing I could do to help bring some peace?
Thanks in advance.

Hi, you've done well writing the letter, that's a great start. You could write a letter to him and don't post it, burn it. Also sage smudge sticks are meant to clear out bad energy, I'd give that a go.
I wish you well, let me know how you get on x

You could do a tie breaking exercise. Basically, you relax somewhere where you can safely shut your eyes and concentrate. Imagine all the ties, all the memories and feelings (even negative ones) that bind you to them in physical form, whether actual threads or ropes or whatever, attached to you. Consider each one dispassionately as you can and then firmly and cleanly break that tie. Do this methodically with each one. You should be unattached and uncaring by the end. Remember that the idea is to be completely detached from them, any emotion will continue to tie you to them. You may need to repeat this exercise over time until there is nothing left emotionally or physically to bind you to them.

There is a Taoist saying.........

If you live in the past you will be depressed (@toomanypaws post is a good way to let that go)
If you live in the future you will be anxious (no-one can predict the future)
If you live in the now you will find peace.

If you try to control life, life will control you.

Thank you all, at this point all help is welcome.
I have a weekend to myself coming up so I'll set some time aside to commit to this.

Sea salt baths really help remove any feelings of negativity.