Advice on church issue

[Immigrantsong]

Hi, not sure if anyone can help. We would like to baptise our youngest and approached the church we go to. They want £150!!! Isn't this simony? They claim they need this money to function, but surely donations are up to the discretion of people and not a fixed fee. Does anyone have any tips as to what to do and how to raise this?

@yetalkshitehen yes it depends on the diocese. My church's diocese charges £60 for the baptism certificate. The other one I found (also Orthodox) doesn't have a charge attached. Would have been happy to pay £60 and then donate generously BUT no I will not be paying a penny when someone gives me a pricelist and turns a joy into an obligation.

@phosphorous amen to that! I fully agree!

I can see your point when you put it like that OP. It might be worth checking if it’s the priest or the diocese in your own church first though, it would be a shame to stop attending and for there to be a bad taste because of a misunderstanding.

My fil is a bishop and I have never heard of anyone paying for a baptism! Weddings year as there are fees associated with registering the marriage but never a baptism. No wonder people don't attend church anymore!

@elf1985 is he an orthodox bishop? Disgraceful isn't it? The priest didn't even want to talk about it. Felt like I did something horrendous for asking a simple question.

He is coe. But has relationships with other denominations. I have never heard of this happening.

Precisely. Sacraments should be free. This is simony and against the Christian spirit. Churches of course have expenses, hence why donations are needed. Donations not pricelist and fixed tariffs. To oblige people to pay for things is not right.

That sounds a good solution, you'll probably be more comfortable attending the church which is in line with your views so that's good!

We were asked to pay £60 for a baptism (not during a service). As we had all three children baptised at the same time we gave the priest £180, but we weren't sure if he expected that much.

Adults who are baptised at Easter aren't charged.

I'm told weddings are £600! But a low key convalidation is under £100.

First communion and confirmations are free.

I'm yet to find out how much a funeral costs. I would imagine a similar price to a wedding.

That's my local Catholic Church.

Apparently it's only simony if the baptism is refused if you refuse to pay. I dint think any priest would refuse to babyish baby if you tell them you can only afford £20 and offer that. But then what do I know!

@lynettescavo I am very surprised as our churches used to be united (once upon a time!) and didn't think Catholics had to pay for sacraments! From my catechism if I remember correctly it's considered simony any time you are given a price in exchange for a sacrament.

I’m glad you have found a solution & hope you will consider attending the other church regularly in future... this is NOT the way to draw people into the church family! I totally get charging for the service done on Sunday afternoon etc but as part of standard worship for a regular attendee is totally wrong

What kind of Orthodox Church is it?

Greek or Eastern or Russian or something else?

@subtitleson does it really matter? It's something that should not be happening. Also not comfortable giving even more information as I have already said loads that make me easily identified.

I don't think @Subtitleson is being nosy, OP. It's just interesting to learn about other denominations. Glad all sorted for you though

@mrsa6 yes probably but I feel I have already given a lot of information and it's a very delicate subject. I already feel bad as the whole thing has shaken my faith.

Don't let it shake your faith. It's one random priest/diocese making these particular 'rules'. You have sorted out somewhere else which sounds supportive and helpful - focus on that.

Crumbs a bit of an aggressive reply there @Immigrantsong

@subtitleson I explained why I wasn't comfortable with the question asked. Not meant at all in an aggressive way. Why did you want to know anyways?

@mrsa6 will do. Thank you kindly

What does simony mean ?

A bit like Simon?

But didn't john the baptist baptize in a river?

Churches cost money to run. Heating, building costs, fancy robes, candles, altar clothes, roof repairs, flowers, flim flam.

I think it is a good idea having charges for certain events.

Our church has a drive through, kids can get baptized without leaving the car, prices are displayed clearly, so marriages, confessions etc are all listed. Regular customers can get a discount card.

Scotland's gone all Vegas like

Baptisms are held as part of Sunday family service. If you want a private ceremony some C of E vicars will do it (many won’t as the baby us being welcomed into gods family and as part of a congregation) but they can charge. I have never heard of charging as part of a weekly service although you need to advise guests to contribute to the collection plate.

I've a number of Orthodox friends (nearly went that route myself) and I've never heard of that kind of charge for a baptism. I'd be very ticked off too, and I'm glad you found an alternative priest.

And to the pp mithering about baptism not making someone a Christian, of course it does. It's rite of initiation. And yes, becoming a Christian is free, which is why the OP is so annoyed about being charged such an exhorbitant fee. A goodwill donation is entirely different.