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Original poster

Pull up a pew and join the Christian chat thread, continued...

270 replies

EddSimcox · 30/04/2018 18:36

Church chat and all related things... weak coffee, dodgy tunes, rubbish attitudes... and the uplifting, inspirational, and hilarious too.

OP posts:
Madhairday · 02/05/2018 23:08

Agreed, Oma. The website Rethinking Hell is especially informative, I think. :)

applesandpears33 · 03/05/2018 21:06

I'll have a look at that website. I've always felt a bit uncomfortable with the fiery pit view of hell. It is particularly hard when friends and family who are not Christians die. I was brought up in quite a traditional church and over the years I think I've become a little numb to the idea of hell being a firey furnace. I can see though that it could be troubling to a 7 year old who is dealing with these things for the first time.

picklemepopcorn · 03/05/2018 21:13

Ooh, not read anything yet, but will come back now I know where you are.

picklemepopcorn · 06/05/2018 13:04

That's interesting, I was preaching on that this morning. I talked about how as little children we just 'do what mum and dad say'. As we get older we have rules we are expected to follow. Eventually, we are able to understand the purposes of the rules, and make appropriate decisions for ourselves. I compared that with Adam and Eve, 10 Commandments, Leviticus and Deuteronomy, then the NT 'love God, one another.'

It was the John and Acts readings, so Peter having to let go of ritualistic food laws, and Jesus saying we are no longer servants but friends.

Doublegloucester · 07/05/2018 18:52

Hi to the new people on the thread Smile

Cish all I can add is separating 'doing bad things' from being a bad person and reminding him that just because he has done bad things, like every human on the planet, they do not make him a bad person. Poor love, sending hugs to you both.

CishAndFips · 08/05/2018 22:15

Thank you Double I made an appointment to talk with head teacher at his school today. He was fantastic and spent an hour talking with him about his good points. Also spoke to the minister at our church too he incorporated the butterfly song into his family service and has said he will work on a few ideas to help him over the coming weeks. I've had some amazing advice on here and in real life and we are really focusing on boosting his self esteem.

Dutchoma · 08/05/2018 22:53

That’s very good to hear Cish

Tiggles · 08/05/2018 23:39

Hello feeling a bit guilty that it must be about a year since I posted as I was looking forward to being ordained deacon and I am now looking forward to being ordained priest in June. Time flies rather too fast!

Dutchoma · 09/05/2018 06:59

That must have been a busy and very exciting year Tiggles. Has it been a blessng to you?

picklemepopcorn · 09/05/2018 07:15

Congratulations Tiggles!

What a lovely Head Teacher, Cish.

starsandstuff · 09/05/2018 13:27

Hi all. I've been reading the older thread too and hope it's ok to hop on! I have a question that I've been thinking over - even dreaming about! - for a long time. A quest, really... And so I thought I would ask here if that's ok?

Basically, my own belief is that the most important thing is the command to "love each other as I have loved you" (in Buddhism, I think, "love everyone as a mother loves her only son".) To me that's the key to the Kingdom of Heaven here on Earth. Please forgive me for anything that comes across as too obvious or too stupid. So my question is: How? I try hard, but how do I keep love in my heart when people are difficult? To really love everyone as Jesus did, that's my goal. It's possible because He did it - it's only ego that stops us. I have done loving kindness meditation, I do talk to God, my job is actually centered on loving people in a way. I can sit with people who have done horrendous things, and feel genuine compassion for them, but last week my sister did something that hurt me and it's twisting away inside and I can't let it go! How do you all keep a pure love in your heart? Thanks.
(If I should just post this as a separate thread instead of hijacking this one just let me know)

picklemepopcorn · 09/05/2018 14:10

Hello, stars.
A very wise vicar taught me to pray for change in myself, not in the people I struggle with.
What helps me is analysing why a particular situation is so hard for me. Often it's because of something about me rather than the other person.
So I'd recognise that the person has hurt me, recognise they have behaved badly, then ask myself why I care so much. Is it betrayal? Is it jealousy? When I've pinned down what it is, I find it easier to know why it bothers me. It's often something I recognise in myself, and dislike.

I also find it helpful to remember to look for Jesus in the other person, and to disregard the bits that are not. I suppose I choose what to focus on in a relationship.

That may not be at all relevant to you! It's just what went through my mind!

starsandstuff · 09/05/2018 14:12

I also find it helpful to remember to look for Jesus in the other person

Oh that's lovely, thank you x

Tiggles · 12/05/2018 00:00

Dutchoma it has been the best year ever. Despite loving my previous job I just can't imagine doing anything other than 'vicaring' now.

thegreenheartofmanyroundabouts · 12/05/2018 17:27

I'm just back from the installation of the Bishop of London and it was marvellous. We had good hymns, the choir sang well and all the bling in the vestment closet was out on full display.

Now I have to write a sermon.

Bump. Hello parish ministry!

Original poster
EddSimcox · 12/05/2018 22:12

Wow greenheart it sounded great from what I heard on Twitter. Good preach?

My latest random excitement is that Bishop Michael Curry is preaching at the royal wedding. He’s an inspired choice IMHO.

OP posts:
CishAndFips · 13/05/2018 16:58

I was speaking to the Deacon at our church today. She is keen to reach out to 20-40 year olds and make worship more relevant to them. It's made me think what do people in this age range want to see? What does your church do Well?

picklemepopcorn · 13/05/2018 18:17

What made a difference to me was being welcomed in Church and in leadership despite my children. If the church hadn't managed my children, I wouldn't have been able to stay. I had my second child at 30. I was able to do all sorts of things with the child in tow- alpha, daytime home group, baby group etc.

When I was 28, the provision of toddler Church, baby groups, and wise older women to support me in parenting was hugely influential.

The churches I have been in have allowed me to develop my ministry with children dangling off me as I preach!

I think catering to people's life stage is the key. Do they want marriage courses, parenting groups, social activities (singles nights). Building connections between the age groups is also really important. So inviting a young single to get involved with your family, having them to dinner, etc. Students and people in their first job can be really isolated.

Gosh, sorry, that was longer than I expected it to be!

CishAndFips · 13/05/2018 19:53

Not at all pickle that's really insightful thank you.

madmomma · 13/05/2018 21:22

Hi guys, hope I'm ok to join? I'm not an 'official' Christian, (atheist upbringing) but I feel like one in my heart. I adored bible stories at school, and felt very comforted by our Catholic friends' deep faith). I pray to Jesus as often as I can, and take inspiration from writings by Henri Nouwen, Thomas Merton, C.S.Lewis. I tried the alpha course when I lost my beloved Dad 7 yrs ago, but the leader promptly told me that my dad would be in hell because he wasn't a Christian, so that put paid to that line of enquiry! I've found it more helpful to read and study alone so far. No idea what to do next, if anything, so I'll just keep praying and see what feels right. I've loved this thread.

picklemepopcorn · 13/05/2018 21:41

Hello!
I am sorry about your experience of Alpha. There will be better places to try out!

Devonishome1 · 13/05/2018 22:39

Someone from my church has died from a brain tumour at just 40 years old. I’m struggling to understand where God was . I’m struggling to understand why God didn’t save him. I can’t find any answers within myself to understand why such things happen to people.

Original poster
EddSimcox · 13/05/2018 23:09

devon I'm so sorry to hear that; it must be awful for everyone. I don't think we can understand those things; they are just part of our broken world. All we can do is turn to God for comfort for ourselves and sit with all those who grieve. For some it may help perhaps to remember Jesus' own suffering, and to know he feels our pain too.

madmomma sounds like you are doing pretty well by yourself Smile. Alpha doesn't suit everyone - or at least some alpha leaders don't! If you need help finding the kind of church where you are free to explore your faith without judgment people here might have ideas if you tell us whereabouts you are.

pickle we need you to come and advise us in my church! The 20-40 age range is our hardest. We're strong on 40-50-60-70-90, and we have tons of kids atm. But only a handful of young adults. cish I can't help at all because I was out of church completely from 18-44 Blush

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 14/05/2018 00:05

it is for God to judge whether your dad was or was not "saved"/Christian etc. same goes for you too. there is the example of the thief on the cross, who asked jesus to remember him... Flowers

Flowers too devon

I am contemplating playing new vicar bingo.
I wonder what the comments will be.

I have heard all sorts of stuff before, from both sides. I try to be like the third monkey, in see all, hear all, and say nowt.

It will be interesting to watch the vicar politics. New vicar, who do you talk to first? must be quite tricky.

Dutchoma · 14/05/2018 07:20

madmomma the reason I can’t attend sservices at my current church is precisely this issue of ‘convert or be damned’. When my brother died through euthanasia a couple of years ago (Holland) I struggled massively with this as he hated me being a Christian and most certainly never ‘accepted Jesus as his Saviour’. No point seeking help for the church I was in and so I wrote to John Pritchard; I got to know him when he led a trip to Israel. He wrote: “Is the God who loved us so much that he fully entered our life and loved us to the very end the kind of God who would condemn most of the human race to eternal damnation? Isn’t the Bible a love story of God patiently pursuing us telling us he loves us an wants us to live in this new creation (the Kingdom)? Would this God conemn those who hadn’t heard of Jesus, or hd heard of him in a distorted way, or had been damaged by the church, or had been born before Jesus came? That’s most of the human race.
So the vital question for me is what kind of God do we believe in? And if he is ‘out to get us’ how can he be worthy of our love and worship? God is Christlike - utterly good, just and loving.”
That helped me a lot and certainly blurs the line between ‘official’ and ‘unofficial’ Christians.
You are very welcome here.
Devonishome the question of suffering is one any Christian struggles with. There are no answers, easy or otherwise, we can only bow in the presence of God and acknowledge that his wisdom is greater than ours and no love is ever lost.