Always feeling like a pushover-struggling with Christian perspective

[Lipbalmcherry]

Hi there,
Name changed. I am a Christian, however I always struggle with being assertive and speaking up, even when I know I am in the right, all because I have it in my head that as a Christian I should be kind, take it on the chin, ignore people who are awful to you etc etc
Today I had a run in of sorts with a person who I know quite well, but have had frosty relations with in the past. We are inevitably in each others lives (DSD's Mum) and that won't change, however they were very rude to me in person and I feel like I can't say anything. A mixture of lacking in confidence and feeling like I shouldn't.
Any other Christians struggle with this type of thing?

Standing up for yourself and what you think is right and being deliberately unkind are two different things.
Do you think it may be more a fear of conflict and not being liked?

Many people suffer with that kind of thinking, so no need to confuse it with your faith.

I have no faith (and am happy with that) but can sometimes struggle with assertiveness when faced with rudeness.

Christian or not, I think it is about choosing when to stand up and when to turn the other cheek.
In your case think carefully: is pushing back and fighting really worth it? What would you gain from it? Or would letting it wash over you and behaving like an adult be the right course of action?

Thanks all for your responses. I think you're right that being a Christian has nothing really to do with it. I definitely have a fear of confrontation and conflict, particularly so with this person. In the past I did stand up for myself much more with her but she is the type that you can't rationalise with and she will shout you down very quickly. Therefore it seems useless to engage with her to try and resolve something. It just enrages me at times. I think I have to take the high road and choose to ignore and move on.

I agree that being a Christian isn't really relevant. Being a kind, caring person of faith absolutely does NOT mean you have to take rudeness from others. That isn't kindness to yourself, or to the other person who is allowed to continue acting in such a damaging way.

Not sure what sort of conflict you're experiencing, but could you perhaps sit down with her and discuss it?

Oh do read Boundaries by Dr Henry Cloud.

Live changing!