Angel I completely agree Thing is once u notice this you cannot un notice it. I see everything. My dc are at the only local school, CofE, it's horrific. Infants end up having nightmares.
I clearly remember after yet another particularly unpleasant incident my DF telling the vicar "If you're a christian I don't want to be one". It had started with the new vicar, he's now a Bishop, I must have been about 4. I've never seen my DM cry as much over anything, from all the bullying from the new vicar and his cronies. After the vicar had cleansed the church of all the wrong type including my Headteacher, he sent letters banning them all from all the churches in that parish. They had mostly moved to another church in that parish, and no he couldn't do that, DM attends to this day. The new church got one of the very first new female vicars. DM laughed as she said it was intended as a punishment for all the trouble they had caused.
I think it is very easy to believe when you don't attend church, you have no reason to have to do mental gymnastics to justify the contradictions experienced in church.
As I grew up, I reflected on the past and tried to make some sense of it. It was scary when I first started to follow the thought process of questioning. Even more scary when I ended with the final question of was there really a deity. I found peace. Faith left my life, and I was happy. Other's would occasionally push their faith in my life, mostly negative experiences, presumed privilege.
DC has brought a whole new way for faith to be pushed into our lives on a daily basis and be judged. DS1 was told he wouldn't get xmas presents if he didn't believe by his teacher.
It has really come home how christianity is about judging. But not so much about christians judging non-xtians, that's all in the bible, it's denomination against denomination, cliques against others. Flippant comments, dropped in conversations, "not a real christian, snigger, snigger" . Having dc means I have been forced to explain myself many many times in recent years to christians thinking they would then leave me alone and without fail each and everyone has appeared to listen and then said " but that's not real christianity, we're different we're real christians".
All I want to be is left alone, but instead I find myself reading about Welby's attempts to save a, by their on reports, dying institution. Christianity has never been so active in parliament or so aggressive. The Alpha course is just the tip of an iceberg.
On the plus side I have discovered that the history of the abrahamic religions is fascinating, particularly christianity. I will always be amused that a pope in the 4/5th century sent out an order to convert the masses by making up festivals to take over local festivals. That's the real reason xmas is when it is.