Bible Class Problem

[ShakeofFara]

I am hoping you will all be able to help with a problem I have.

I help to teach bible class every Sunday morning...or at least on the Sundays I can make it and therein lies the problem.

DH and I both have hobbies that require us to give up weekends throughout the year and I always give the bible class Leader (Sarah - not real name) my list of 'away' dates at the start of each term. There are never loads but a few scattered about per term.

Sarah is not happy with this and I have offered to step down as I can not commit to every week (it's worth noting that I am not the only assistant) but Sarah refused saying she needs everyone she can get.

If I've been away Sarah makes lots of comments about my absence and how she's the only one committed to the class. Frequent mentions of me not being there every week and borderline rudeness too.

Sarah moans about organising every lesson but refuses to allow the rest of us to take a turn. She hates having to ask anyone to do anything and stood over me yesterday while I was cutting angel wings out of card and told me I was doing it wrong.

The class only has 6 members. 4 are 12 years old and the other two are 16/17. Sarah decided to split the class and the older two now meet at her house on a Friday evening, this started a few weeks ago.

The final nail for me is Sarah organising and hosting a bible class Christmas dinner at her house but I'm not invited. I want to stand down from the class. Sarah clearly objects to my not attending every week and I can't turn the other cheek to her comments any more.

How do I tell her I won't be back?

She's a nightmare to be honest. The comments have me biting my tongue very hard!

i would say something like "Sarah, I find your authoritarian manner unchristian, and to leave someone out of a celebration of Christs birth is wholly inappropriate, even Judas was invited to the last supper when Jesus knew he was going to betray him....as christians we should lead by example and I feel that we are not doing a good job in doing that for the kids in Sunday school so I am stepping down" and then tell her (and do) that you will pray for her

User that's a reply she'd be furious to receive but also very true. I feel unchristian wanting to leave the class but I can't work with Sarah anymore.

Could you chat with your pastor or one of your elders about this? I think if you are feeling this way then you do need to leave the class however others maybe also be feeling this way and although she may not be prepared to accept feedback from you, she may from others in a more senior role.

You are cutting out cardboard angel wings for 12-17 year olds??

Scrappy I think I will speak to the Minister as I fear Sarah may be part of the reason that so few move up from Sunday school to bible class.

The cutting out of the angel wings was for Sarah for a window sill. She made the body and I the wings while the members decorated the room.

I too think I would speak to the Vicar / Priest / Minister / Pastor / Elders

Explain you are happy to help but can't do every week and that 'Sarah' seems not to want people who can't, so sadly you are resigning. Up to them then to see if there is something they can do.

Sarah decided to split the class and the older two now meet at her house on a Friday evening, this started a few weeks ago

I would report that as a safeguarding violation. Is it just her and the older two? All my training volunteering with young people- you just do not switch class into your home. Imagine if Sarah were male, inviting two 16/17 year olds to his house every friday, presumably with no parents present- no different under safeguarding rules because she's female.

Do you have safeguarding training? Do you have a welfare officer? I'd definitely be bringing that one up with someone.

I think saying the above to Sarah if true is worthwhile, someone promoting Christian values should be promoting them.

OP also look up the serenity prayer, I think it will help

Yes, having two of them in her home is a safeguarding issue. Is someone with more authority aware that she is doing that?

I don't think there is a safeguarding issue, both are over 16 and are old enough to consent to sexual relationships

User, yes it is.

They are over 16, yes, but it becomes a safeguarding issue because Sarah has a position of responsibility and influence over these children.

Same as it would be a safeguarding issue should a teacher or sports coach develop a sexual relationship with a 16 year old student.

Even if it's not a sexual relationship, it is still inappropriate to have them in her house with no parents. As their teacher she could be influencing them in various ways- if her personal religious views are extreme, for example.

Every safeguarding course I have been on covers this, and it is a reportable issue. It's the position of influence that is key.

really is absolutely right.
Putting it another way, she is leaving herself very open to accusations which she won't be able to prove her innocence.
Surely in this day and age, any youth leader would know that ?