Christian prayer thread

[Dutchoma]

Just starting a new thread without any embellishments so it doesn't run out.
Please add any concerns/witterings/names to it.
Love to you all.

Thank you, that's food for thought. And by then we should know more about my husband's health. Thanks for your advice and kind thoughts, it's much appreciated.

Hello and thank you for the prayers and kind words . I am so very tired of this all. I started to write some more, but for now, I cannot. I keep trying and I no longer know what to say.

I am adding prayers for your friend MHD a very difficult position and for her friends and family who are supporting her.

Dont good that you are getting some legal advice - I pray for your healing and for a positive outcome legally.

Soozi that sounds very hard, a veritable storm of issues to cope with. Prayers for calm and strength in the midst of this and better weather ahead, and continued healing.

girlandboy I have similar issues with my own mother, except she has left me alone when I snapped nearly two years ago and asked her to. She did something very destructive and I could not cope emotionally with it. I do not pretend to understand, though I think even she realises she went too far, but not maybe the effect of it. But Oma is correct, she is a wise woman, you can set it aside temporarily and focus on immediate issues. You are not closing the door forever shut, but just for now because emotionally you can only cope with so much. To be honest, it has helped that my mother has heeded my request to be left in peace as I just felt overwhelmed. As to faith, my mother brought me up in the Church and I am profoundly grateful for that. But I think the human condition means that people can act in non-Christian ways without that changing what we ourselves can believe to be Christian or effecting our own relationship with God. If that makes sense.

Prayers all around

Cocoa you seem very tired and worn out. My heart goes out to you as I know you are struggling with dealing with a difficult person and situation. I'm praying that the way becomes clearer to you and that you get some respite from all the hassle. I'm sorry that your mother is not a support. I know personally what that's like because, as you know, I'm in a similar situation myself. But I don't have the additional stresses that you have and I admire your resilience so much.

Don't you aren't being vain over your teeth. Go ahead with the implants without a second thought if that is what is needed. As for the accident, you are trying to make sense of what happened and it is an important part of your life narrative for you to know what exactly happened. People mean well with their 'it was an accident, don't think too much' statements but I can see why you need to know.

Soozi thinking of you and your recovery. Bloomed hope all is well. mhd praying for your friend. Orchid how are you these days?

girlandboy , Dutchoma had wise advice. Given yourself a relationship holiday so you can get some clarity and peace. It's not an easy situation to be in especially when parents should be there for you. Unfortunately some struggle with personality difficulties which affect how they parent. It's very sad when you see the pattern. Put yourself and your health first.

I've been reading a bit about resilience. I don't feel very resilient myself, although my dh thinks I am. I read a long term study about resilience in children as they grew up. It was interesting as sometimes resilience waxes and wanes over a lifetime. The children who had difficult lives but who were resilient had what was termed as a strong 'locus of control' so they felt that no matter what happened to them, they weren't powerless but had a chance to change the outcome of their lives. They were in control even in a very small way and felt things would/could work out in the long run.

Apparently resilience can be learned, it's not just innate. I suppose stress comes from feeling that you have no control over events so reframing negative thoughts and feelings helps with stress and also is good for problem solving and thence resilience. I'm rambling, so I'll stop now. We all shuffle along doing our best. I suppose it's no bad thing to think that things may work out for us and that we will be strong enough to make sense of what life brings.

Today's Gospel in my church:

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.

Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven

Lissette, thank you for posting that and your thoughts and prayers yesterday. You were not rambling. I realised yesterday that I do have clarity if I listen to myself, but that every effort is being made to make me doubt my reality. It's gas lighting, except he is also doing it via people involved in DS care as well as to me. So I need to concentrate on what i know. It's exhausting.

Ah, yes gas lighting. My mother deploys that tactic. Stand firm.

Thanks Lissette, I don't think I have a choice but to stand firm. I am so much working on the thoughts of being held in God's love, all of us. I am just so mentally and physically tired. But that will pass as spring comes.
I am sorry about your mother, it is hard.

My prayers for everyone on this thread and beyond. The news makes heavy reading and I pray that good will triumph over evil.

Cocoa. You are stronger than you think and braver than you imagine too. You must concentrate on what you know and stand firm. God is with you and he loves you. He will guide you through this. We will all be here for you, supporting you through this. Whatever it takes you will be able to do this. Concentrate on what you know and stand firm, it's your own truth and it's very important and powerful. Prayers for you.

Please can I have some good advice. Just before my sad died, he bought me and my sister a piece of jewellery. He bought me the most beautiful gold cross and chain. It was very delicately engraved with a fine pattern and was, along with my wedding ring, the most important, meaningful and treasured possession I have.

In the accident the cross was lost. The chain still remains. The hospital and police and ward etc were told about it. It wasn't found at the scene. Everyone did their best to find it and dh told them about it and what it means to me.

I realised that the necklace was missing in the early days of the accident. I was told that it had been damaged during the accident and had gone for repair. When I was shown the 'repaired necklace' I noticed that the engraved pattern was no longer there and it looked slightly different. I was told that the jewellers had to polish the gold and remove damage etc and in doing so the pattern had been removed. I presumed that this accounted for the other differences I had noted.

Anyway today I was talking to my mum about the accident and I mentioned that I had lost my watch in the accident and that I was sad as it was a gift from family and I had had the watch for almost 20 years and it cost 300.00 then, and did she remember anything about it when she was dealing with the cross repairs.

She knew nothing about it and I mentioned how upsetting it was that the accident had done this to my personal possessions as well as my injuries.

She was acting a bit strange and I questioned this. Reluctantly she told me that the cross had been lost in the accident and so as not to upset me in the early days of being in hospital, she and dh had purchased another cross and hoped that I wouldn't notice the difference. When I did notice they pretended that the cross was polished and repaired hence the missing pattern and slightly different shape.

I am so very sad that the cross is lost. I know that it was part of the accident and everyone tried to find it. I know that my mum bought a new replacement and I still have the original chain. However I am just so sad. Dh has been to the accident site lots with the dc and they just can't find it. He is trying to borrow a metal detector to look over the accident site although it might not have come off there.

I like the new cross but it's just not got the connections with dad that the original one had. I can't wear it due to the neck brace but I feel that the accident managed to affect every part of me that I hold dear. I have facial scaring, broken teeth needing dental work replacements, my hand will be permanently lumpy due to the fracture breaking the bone in four pieces and now my personal possessions are affected. Even two rings had to be cut off my fingers after the break made them swell up. My grandmas eternity ring being one of them.

Please can you give me some sensible advice on the cross that is lost and in accepting the new one. I know that mum paid such a lot for replacing it, I feel like I am ungrateful for it not being the same. Help me see sense and get over this. I feel a bit silly but it's so sentimental and has upset me.

Sorry for sounding like a baby!!

you do not sound like a baby and your whole post makes me cry for you. I don't have anything useful to say apart from that your dad came to you when you were on the brink of life and death, and your family are doing so much to find the cross. Your dad loved you very much. He is with God and God loves you too. That is not gone with the loss of the cross. Nor is your grandmothers love gone with the loss of her ring.

Your DH and your mum have tried to protect you from the loss of something they know you hold dear, your DC have been helping with that. There is so much love for you there, which I don't think was always obvious before the accident.

Love yourself too, be gentle on yourself as your emotions and sadness are normal. It must feel like so much was broken and lost in the accident and it has affected your body, your work and your possessions. It feels like that because it is true. It will take time to come to terms with that. It is okay to be sad. I don't think you need to accept it as being the same; you can grieve the loss of the precious gift your dad gave you and accept the new one as also precious but in a different way. When you feel ready to. As you say, you cannot wear it anyway yet, so you have time to reflect on it all. I am praying for you

There is very little anyone can say, dear Dont. You have suffered immeasurable loss in the accident and will go on to suffer, maybe forever. There may be permanent damage, the cross may never be found and so on.
What you have not lost is the love of your mother, nor can anything spoil the very special relationship you had with your dad. Even the love of your husband shines through in him and the children going to look for the cross and still looking. Those things cannot be taken away from you. And the only thing I can say is: hold on to what cannot be taken. Hold on to the fact that you are still alive, that you are getting better and that your mum did the best she could in replacing the cross. It's very cold comfort, but I hope that it is some comfort. It is not childish to mourn the loss of so mch.

The cross was given as an act of love and it was replaced quietly as an act of love. While it is a terrible shame to lose the original, the important thing was how the cross facilitated love in your family. I can well understand how you are upset and you aren't being silly. I badly scraped a beautiful watch that my gran had inherited from her great aunt. It was an accident but I've ruined it and I don't have much to remember Gran by. But at the end of the day if my house burned down with it inside, I wouldn't care as long as my family are fine. Initially I'd be wistful but in the long term, no.

I can see why you are so shaken up Don't, the damage to your teeth and dear face, the nagging aches, then the cross and the rings. It's like you've been turned upside down and shaken and it is normal to feel sad about the rings, watch and the cross and to mourn them, because they represent people and memories. Allow yourself to feel mixed up and bereft and allow the loss of the cross to sink in. I really feel for you. X

Thank you all for replying so quickly and so comfortingly. It's just the link with dad and gran and I feel it's been sort of tainted. However if I take your advice, dad and grans love isn't tainted. It could never be. Even with the loss of something precious, acts of love for me have been carried out. Dd went online and searched tirelessly and repeatedly for a replacement, my mum bought it without a moments thought for the extra cost and everyone has been searching for it. So good actions have been linked with the old cross and transferred to the new cross sort of giving it special qualities of its own, for dad and I.

Dd said today that she thought that the first cross was responsible for saving me and protecting me and for me seeing my dad when I was so poorly. She thinks that it had served it's special purpose and had to go back to dad. She thought dad was aware of my loss and sadness and so organised a replacement, to protect and look after me going forward The new cross is for me going forward. I thought that was a lovely thought of hers a new cross for my new start. Dh said that had it happened when dad was still alive, he would have gone out and replaced it and not put too much on the lost one and found good words to describe the new one coming to be.

I suppose that it's just that everything is happening all at once. Injuries and scars and teeth etc and adjusting to that and a loss connected with dad, who would have been very concerned about the accident and my recovery.

I hoped for your sensible words of advice as soon as I found out about it. I was very quiet and everyone here was talking about it and all I could think of was telling you all about it and getting proper understanding words and being able to process this and make sense of it.

Mum said that she knew that I loved and treasured the cross and just how upset I would be that it was lost, she worried that I would be so sad had I known, that I would make the brain bleed worse. Perhaps that is a little ott but she thought it. Dd searched lots of pictures of me wearing the cross to try to match it up with a replacement. They had the policemen searching the scene with their fingertips and they said they would pass the information it on just incase it was found. The nurses searched everywhere even the laundry department were looking for it and the ward staff. It could be absolutely anywhere. Dh still intends to look for it. So it's still ongoing in his view.

However the love of everyone concerned with looking for it and trying to find it has transferred to the new cross. Dad will have seen all of it and will know what happened.

Seriously thank you all for your words. I am now a lot more comforted with not just the actual lost item, but I understand how and why it's all impacting and manifesting and I don't feel like a silly child.

Bless you all and thank you all so much for wanting to help me. Your words are now part of what makes the new cross so important to me and I will take that with me.

Lissett, really sorry that the watch was damaged from your gran. for you and for you all too xx

It was a watch on a chain that Gran's great Aunt got for being in service in a big house. It's mid 19th century with a scratch right down the glass now thanks to me. She was so careful of it too.

On a very sad note, we've lost dearest Zombie. May she rest in peace.

Glad we still have you Don't. X

As I'm reading this the radio is playing "O radiant dawn' by James MacMillan.

To God be all the glory: for Zombie and for all the comfort we are able to give to each other.
We have not 'lost' Zombie, she has safely passed into the arms of her Heavenly Father.

I hope that Zombie passed peacefully and I pray that she is now at peace with the Lord.

She died peacefully in her sleep. I know she's not lost really and that there is a bigger picture. She was in my mind first thing today and I feel sad despite the fact that she is home finally. What a lovely lady.

Dear Zombie. Rest in peace darling. She was a very special person and so much loved.

Prayers for you all this morning.

Dont dear one it sounds like you are so very surrounded with love and the new Cross is almost like a symbol of that with your dad's love running through it too. It sounds like this whole thing has been so very devastating and will have far reaching effects but I am so glad you have support. We are here for you too and so so relieved you are with us here still. Praying for you today with love

first day back to school for a week. hoping for a peaceful evening.

Rest in peace with the Lord our God Zombie and prayers for everyone who loves you and grieves for you.

Mad. I really like your words.about the new cross being a symbol of love surrounding me and has dad's love running through it. It's absolutely perfect. I shall always associate this with it and it seems so fitting put like that. Like it's meant to be. Thanks for this xxx

Hoping the first day back at school was ok for everyone and you get a peaceful evening tonight Bes.

Prayers for you Lissette. I understand how sad you feel about Zombie. It's clear that she was a lovely lady who will be greatly missed.

Thank you Don't. I was a lurker rather than a true Phalanx member but she was very brave and endured a lot throughout her life. I have a candle lit for her tonight and have had two glasses of whisky in her honour

Dont

prayers for mhd's friend, don't, Oma.

dd has an appointment today. I hope that we will get some answers to her difficulties.

I hope it goes well, BES. Let us know, won't you?