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Original poster

Catholics and abortion

29 replies

floraposte · 02/02/2007 12:04

Is it possible to have had an abortion in the past (much regretted), yet practice as a catholic and bring up one's future children as catholics?

OP posts:

snowisgone · 13/02/2007 22:35

hugs and prayer to you both quootie and flora

nearlythree · 12/02/2007 11:14

Just realised how much my post is like Frogs!

nearlythree · 12/02/2007 08:00

Daisey, you can go to any church. I would consider finding one that has an attachment to a university as the priest there will be used to dealing with issues like this, rather than be some dinosaur.

This is about forgiving yourself, God has forgiven you (if there was anything to forgive - you and Quootie both sound like victims to me) - you need to know that you are loved and lovable. Still praying. xxx

madamez · 12/02/2007 01:14

Gods are supposed to be all-knowing, all-loving and all-forgiving. If other human beings can understand that you felt unable to carry a pregnancy to term,. then surely a god, which is supposeldy a being that is all-knowing and all- loving and ll-forgiving, can understand that.
If it can't understand that, it's not a god worth bothering with.

Quootiepie · 11/02/2007 22:28

Thankyou so much, I will google it when I feel a little more up to it.

Flora {{hugs}} xXx

Cazee · 11/02/2007 21:22

Quootipie, it sounds as if you are still suffering greatly after your abortion experience, and if you feel the need to punish yourself you really need to feel the overwhelming relief confession and absolution would bring. Remember that Jesus, whilst enduring the agony of crucifixion, called out to the Father to forgive those who had done this to him. If he can forgive them he can forgive you! As it says in the Gospel of Luke "There is more joy in heaven over one sinner who has a change of heart than over ninety-nine just persons who need no repentance". You might also find it helpful to talk to organisations like British Victims of abortion (do a google search to find their website), who offer support to people who are suffering after an abortion experience. I believe they have a Christian perspective on it too.

mosschops30 · 11/02/2007 20:50

floraposte I would go and see 'a' priest. Doesnt have to be the one in your parish if that makes it easier to talk to someone you dont know.

I dont think you need to 'confess' as such but as you say you regret it so just tell him that and how it makes you feel. Best to treat confession as a free counselling session rather than a punishment of sins.

Good luck

daisey · 11/02/2007 20:46

so i can go to any church? thankyou for your prayers guy xx

Roobie · 11/02/2007 19:44

Quootiepie - I understand how you feel but try and not think about the priest in confession as a judging human being - that's not his role. And, believe me, the feeling you get after coming out of a particularly challenging and fretted about confession is fantastic.

nearlythree · 11/02/2007 19:37

I'm not a Catholic, and don't believe you need a sacrament to be forgiven or reconciled. However, I do think that such things can be useful in helping us to know we are forgiven, through having a ritual for it.

Quootie , God isn't scarey. Think of God as Mother as well as Father. I will pray for you too.

Quootiepie · 11/02/2007 19:31

I am a catholic, still a Catholic and yet have had an abortion. I am not proud of what I have done, I punish myself daily for what I have done, but I guess we all make mistakes and are owed forgiveness. I have not forgiven myself, but... I would forgive another Catholic who had an abortion. I did not willingly have mine. I am too scared to go to confession, so just carry it around with me.

Roobie · 11/02/2007 19:25

Indeed yes, as others have stated, if you are genuinely sorry then all you have to do is go to confession. It matters not a hoot whether the priest is shocked or disapproving, he is only the middleman there to pass on the absolution that is due to you - so just go along to one of the confession sessions at your nearest cathedral if you don't want it to be obvious to your parish priest who you are. It is absolutely and categorically the case that, if you are genuinely repentant, God will forgive you and you can then resume your life with the slate wiped clean so to speak.
The catholic teaching however is that absolution has to be obtained via the sacrament of confession so just praying for forgiveness by yourself will not 'work' if you see what I mean - in the eyes of catholic church.

twinsetandpearls · 11/02/2007 19:23

have checked and although abortion is a grave or mortal sin it can be forgiven throught the sacrament of reconcilliation. I will be thinking of you.

nearlythree · 11/02/2007 19:21

Daisey, your posts have really made me feel for you. I believe God has forgiven you already, what you need now is to forgive yourself. I've been praying for you and will continue to do so. Be gentle with yourself.

twinsetandpearls · 11/02/2007 19:14

yes, find yourself a good understandin priest or if it really bothers you a priest you will never see again and go to confession.

I am saying this off the top of my head so will check my catechism.

I am divorced and living in sin, this has respurcussions for me, I am not supposed to take communion but dd is fully welcomed into the church.

daisey · 11/02/2007 19:09

i dont belong to a church and if i did i dont think i could confide in a priest id be too ashamed to go there again. And can god really forgive something like this? If i just go to a church and prey for forgiveness would that be enough?

MaryBS · 11/02/2007 17:58

Sometimes you need to talk it through with someone, like a priest or minister, whether Catholic, Anglican or any other denomination or religion.

If you're anything like me, it isn't always enough to feel sorry for what you've done, it doesn't take away that fear of not being forgiven. Sometimes you need to talk it through.

Our local Anglican cathedral for instance, you can arrange to see a priest who will hear your confession. Confession isn't just for Catholics.

Nettee · 10/02/2007 15:38

Daisey - I grew up in the anglican tradition and was taught that if you genuinely feel remorse and ask God for forgiveness directly then you will be forgiven. It is as described by Cazee - as if it had never happened.

daisey · 10/02/2007 14:18

im not a catholic. But i do believe in god i also had an abortion which i regret. How can i go about getting forgiveness from god. It haunts me what i have done.

Cazee · 02/02/2007 14:25

If you are sorry, and you confess to a priest and recieve absolution, then it is as if it never happened. You are totally forgiven by God . Remember at Mass each week we hear the priest repeat the words of Jesus "This is my blood...which will be shed so that sins may be forgiven"

Rhubarb · 02/02/2007 13:06

Why not email a priest?

I did this recently when I was in France and desperately needed to get something off my chest. I emailed a priest in England and got a really nice reply.

MaryBS · 02/02/2007 13:01

Praying for you.

I'm a lapsed Catholic (now ex-Catholic as I've now joined the C of E), but I know that feeling of being scared of rejection TOO well... in my case it was because I got divorced/remarried...

Original poster

floraposte · 02/02/2007 12:34

Thank you all so much. You've no idea how much your posts have helped. I've been carrying this around for far too long. I'll definitely go to confession.

Thanks again.

OP posts:

Tortington · 02/02/2007 12:25

go to a church that isn't going to become your regular church for confession - if your afraid

Tortington · 02/02/2007 12:24

yes yes yes. go to confession.

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