Praying into 2016: a Christian prayer thread for the New Year

[Tuo]

Happy New Year friends.

This thread is a safe space where anyone - regular, occasional visitor, lurker, committed Christian or waverer - is welcome to come and leave their prayers in the knowledge that they will be prayed for. No problem is too big or small to share here, and if you just want to come and say 'hi', that's fine too.

Looking back through our previous thread, we pray in particular for:

ALittleFaith - for good treatment for her anxiety; for better understanding from her boss; for the lovely Faithlet.

amberlight - for her work supporting people with autism, and for her and her family.

Anjelica27 - for her DS, who has mental health problems, and for Anjelica and her family.

BlackEyedSusan - for all that she has to juggle as a single mum, for her DC, and for her mum. Praying for a peaceful and happy 2016.

Dontbesilly - for her dad, who has been diagnosed with cancer, and for all who love and care for him; also for the medical team looking after him; for her DH's work situation; and for Don't's DDog who has a heart condition.

DutchOma - with gratitude for all she does to support people on this thread and elsewhere. Thinking of her especially as the anniversary of the loss of her beloved Bob approaches, in particular after the recent death of her brother as well. May she know God's closeness to her in her grief.

EdithSimcox - for her to be able to find ways to support and nurture her faith; and for understanding from her DP.

FaithLoveandHope - for clarity about what she wants (and what God wants) for her future.

HardyLeodicean - especially for her FIL.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece - for her to find comfort and joy in exploring her faith; also for a good recovery from heart surgery for her best friend's dad.

JugglingFromHereToThere - for her search for rewarding work, for health, and for comfort and strength for her and the rest of her family following the tragic death of her nephew.

Kaykat - following her divorce from an abusive ex; for happiness for her and for her DS.

legohurtswhenyoustandonit - for her to feel more at home and accepted by her church.

LifeofBriony - for her relationship with her DH; also for her DS going back to university after Christmas.

LightnessofBeing - for her new church, and for energy to cope with her punishing work schedule.

MadHairDay - for her health, especially in the cold, wet winter months which are always so hard on her lungs.

Pandora97 - as she starts a new job in a new town for the new year following difficult and stressful times relating to a court case in recent months.

passportmess (formerly known as QuietIsland) - for a colleague whose husband is very ill, and for a university friend who has been diagnosed with cancer.

PatchworkTurtle - for healing in her relationship.

PositiveAttitude - for her DD1, who is depressed, to get the support she needs; for her DD3 and her DH to work through their relationship issues; for PA's DH to find work that makes him happier, for PA's DMum to continue to be happy in her (relatively) new care home and for PA's DDad to cope with her being there. Above all, we pray for PA herself, who is always there for others when they need her, to be happy and fulfilled in 2016.

QoF - for courage when she is feeling anxious.

ScouseQueen - for a full recovery from recent illness.

SESthebrave - for her DH, who has been working abroad, and for SES, juggling everything at home; for her DS to find ways of communicating, rather than lashing out, when he is frustrated; and for her to feel appreciated for the work she does at her church.

TheRealGracePoole - for her ministry to women in her area.

weegiemum - giving thanks for an improvement in her DD1's (borderline) anorexia; praying for weegiemum's own health and for the Master's course which she has undertaken.

And, as always, prayers for anyone I've forgotten (with apologies), for all who lurk but don't post, for 'old-timers' who haven't posted recently, and for newbies who may not have posted yet.

A prayer of St Teresa of Avila

Let nothing disturb you.
Let nothing frighten you.
All things pass away:
God never changes.
Patience obtains all things.
Those who have God
Find they lack nothing;
God alone suffices. Amen

Thank you passport and Oma

DP is truly wonderful. He found me in a really bad state yesterday and really helped me clean up and stop crying my eyes out. Counselling has really helped us get back to communicating as good as we were when we first got together / before we got together but were amazing friends. Today though hes understandably distracted with his DSD so it's difficult to chat. Is parenting, step or otherwise, always this difficult? DSD is an amazing little girl, she's polite, fun, happy and an absolute delight to be around. It's a privilege to be a part of her life. But she's also utterly exhausting at times. She's going through a phase of wanting me to do everything with her, which on the one hand is so lovely because it means she's really taken to me but on the other hand I'm exhausted. I feel bad about needing space from her and she doesn't deserve this, she deserves to have someone who's happy and willing to be with her more. DP and DSD are currently outside washing the car so I have a bit of a break. I'm exhausted but can't sleep.

Sorry I'm massively rambling now. I'm very grateful to be able to talk on here even if it doesn't make much sense as my thoughts are all over the place.

It makes perfect sense Faith. And yes, I think (step) parenting is always hard. And sometimes you need a break and that is perfectly understandable. Keep talking on here, keep talking to your partner and make time during your day to do something you like doing and which gives your mind a rest. 'If you can't sleep, rest," I used to say to my children. What do you do to rest? Knit, colour, listen to music? Whatever it is do a little bit of it every day and don't feel bad about it.

Just quickly popping on to say hello. I am reading through and catching up with everything. I am at page number 35 so almost updated.

Prayers for everyone x

Oh Faith - it's lovely to see you, but I'm sorry that things have been so tough. I'm glad you're getting support, and am praying that things improve for you soon. Oma's ideas are good ones, also because things like colouring or knitting keep your hands busy but don't over-stretch your brain (if that makes sense). Please try to be nice to yourself, rest when you can, and remember that in order to 'love your neighbour as yourself' you also have to love yourself.

I had forgotten that I was in work most of yesterday and then away overnight, so will not be able to start a new thread till either tomorrow night or Tuesday night. It'll be done soon though... just getting organised for the week ahead now.

Sending love and prayers to all on the thread and thinking in particular of the family, friends and constituents of Jo Cox - especially of her DH and children.

From a compline of the Northumbria Community:

Keep Your people, Lord,
in the arms of Your embrace.
Shelter them under Your wings.
Be their light in darkness.
Be their hope in distress.
Be their calm in anxiety.
Be strength in their weakness.
Be their comfort in pain.
Be their song in the night. Amen

Tuo that's a truly lovely prayer.

I've just checked out the Northumbria community webpage and in their online shop, they have devotion books that can be coloured in - illustrations from Lindisfarne etc. I thought these might be of interest Faith if you wanted to colour and pray simultaneously. These books are between £2 something and £4.49.

Thank you for the kind words and prayers.

Faith, be gentle with yourself. I don't know your back story, but your DSD sounds loved and you should not give yourself a hard time for not being up to 24/7 attention when she is with you. Her dad is there, and you will give better of yourself if you are rested, and have clear boundaries around what you need to look after yourself too. I don't know your story or background, those are only my thoughts on what you say about parenting. Apart from anything else, it won't help DSD's mum (if she stays with her mum) if stepmum occupies her all the time - mum won't be able to do that either!

Sometimes I set boundaries around my time by telling DC that I love them, but I need a bit of time for a coffee and a rest. That is okay too.

I am talking with various people to try and find the best way forward for DC2. Some things happened which he disclosed; but without sufficient evidence, basically I am being told it is up to me to keep him safe. I am praying for strength and compassion and the ability to make the right decisions to do this.

Tuo thank you for the prayer you posted, I needed to read that today, it helps. I am adding you all to my prayers .

I woke up with that feeling of utter dread. I really didn't want to get out of bed. DP is useless on a Monday morning so couldn't really encourage me until it was getting quite late. Work has been overwhelming and I'm really not coping. I feel like I'm being very self obsessed and needy right now. I had to email my manager and tell him I wasn't coping and could he please help give me a clear plan of what I'm doing. He did sort of but I'm still feeling pretty lost. I feel like I'm going to cry and I feel really anxious. Really sorry all. I hope your Monday is going better. I do appreciate your replies to me but it's difficult to process right now. DP is out this evening so hopefully I can read back through and catch up and try and process things.

I know about that feeling of utter dread, Faith. Waking up in the night and just being plain scared of ,,,what?
It doesn't happen so much now that I am not so occupied with caring, but the way I used to deal with it was to imagine that I could see into heaven and could see how God was in control of everything. I used to try and name the thing I was afraid of, the nameless dread I found the hardest to cope with.
How are things now, a little bit into the afternoon? Did you make it into work?

I used to deal with it was to imagine that I could see into heaven and could see how God was in control of everything

Yes, for me, I try to remember that we are all held in something larger. I honestly do go out and look at the expanse of the sky sometimes and look at the vastness of it all, and think of the size of the world and beyond, and that is what holds us. So, even if I am feeling lost and despair, I have that sense of being held.

For a long time, I did not see. I went to one of the islands and realised I could see such open space; and then one day at home, I had the realisation that I could see the sky where I lived too in all its beauty.

Faith, do you have an occupational health team? I don't know if you work in a large enough organisation, but if work is overwhelming, maybe you need that extra support. I know you are not reading and processing right now, there is no expectation of this, I just want to send you some prayers and support as I know you are suffering.

Sorry Oma my previous post wasn't very clear. I emailed my manager when I was in work. This afternoon is slightly better but still confused and overwhelmed and feeling like crying :(

The feeling of dread is so horrible isn't it. I don't even know what the dread is about. DP asked this morning if it was work I was dreading, but I don't think so, it's just that general horrible feeling.

Cocoa no occupational health team, the company I work for isn't that big. I keep thinking maybe if I chat to my manager he can help but in all honesty I've no idea what he could do to help. ..

Well done for making it into work and glad you are feeling at least a little bit better. I hope that you can make it without crying.

God is holding you and things will be alright. Until they are alright you need to get through the day bit by bit, holding on to the fact that eventually, slowly they will get better. Keep encouraging yourself, you are doing well.

Faith, so sorry to hear that you are struggling. You sound like a fantastic step-mum and that comes across instantly.

I think I know about the dread. Is it kind of as if there is something terrible happened, but you just can't quite remember what it is? I have a tough of that sometimes, obviously not as intense like you describe, but I am really surprised that you made it to work. You are stronger than you think and braver than you can imagine yourself ever to be. I am personally finding this out on a daily basis, although I always ask for heavenly assistance every few minutes, and it's always availanle, even before I ask.

Try to rest and put yourself first. Look after yourself and then you can begin to recover. I am thinking of you and praying too. You absolutely will get through this. As Churchill said, "when you're going through hell, keep going" please keep talking about things, someone is always here x

Hello everyone. I don't have the icons to do it properly, but I am waving back passport

Off to work again, sorry for always rushing around. I will be back and better organised than before

Apologies if what I described isn't anything like what you are experiencing faith. I read my post back and it sounds trite and I want to apologise if that's the case. I was just trying to imagine how difficult it must be for you. Can you get sick leave to allow you to find the strength and use support to recover? You must have struggled massively at work with everything going on, I doubt that I could have done that x

cocoa... my experience is that you are told that it is up to the non risky parent to keep the children safe. which is really easy (not) when the other one thinks they are ok and get s cross if you say car seats are not done up properly etc. this is not entirely helpful if the person also has parental responsibility. so far, 5.5 years of supervised access has been achieved.

good luck with your situation.

Faith, I don't know, maybe try talking to your manager? If they are a sympathetic person, maybe it will just help to have a problem shared; and they may also have ideas about the job you haven't thought of? But then also, as dont says, you did get to work and that shows strength. A good manager will take the time to listen.

Thank you, BES, basically yes, apparently DC2 is safe because I am focused on his safety and keeping him safe, and there is no further role for external agencies (insufficient evidence for criminal proceedings), apart from lawyers. And there are no resources and no answers.

eek sounds serious.

there is a spectacular lack of concern over dv for example.

Today is another day, I had the thought this morning that God must trust me to see this through, and if I keep faith and strong in what I believe, I will come to the right solution.

I have a good prayer for anxiety, I will try and post it later as I am on my phone just now. Maybe it might help others.

Faith how are you feeling today? How was yesterday evening and overnight? Really praying that you can begin to feel better, even if it's in tiny increments.

I have started bereavement counselling last week. I haven't told anyone in RL. It went well although I wonder what she thinks about me. Personally, I wonder if a chat with the lady priest at the hospice, like I had in dad's final days, might be as effective. She just sat down with me, listened and discussed the resurrection and heaven and it sort of renewed everything. I keep reminding myself of the conversation with her and think that another chat would help. However she is there for the patients and their families and maybe I don't qualify, and I don't want to take her away from current patients and their families. I just can't face going to mums house as it's not the same without him. The garden is looking neglected and although I try to keep it tidy, it's not making a difference and mums back problems prevent her doing much. Two gardeners let her down despite knowing her circumstances too, which upset me. I am finding comfort in gardening though as dad enjoyed it so much. Is trying to be like the deceased person part of the grieving process as I remember doing this with my grandma when she died, only she enjoyed baking and homemaking, I wore an apron to be like her. Omg, that sounds crazy time to go.

Hope you all have good days or bearable ones at least.

Dont everyone grieves in a different way. For me, I can't do thesame meals I did when Bob was alive, or do the big crossword in the Daily Mail on Saturday, or listen to the Archers. I have gone entirely the other way. I would try and get in touch with the chaplain at the hospice, they are very used to families still needing support and half an hour with her might make all the difference. Don't worry about what the bereavement counsellor thinks about you, I would hope she would be sufficiently trained to listen to what the person (you) has to say not to 'think' or make judgments.
Cocoa and BES both, failed relationships are so very hard to deal with, I pray that God would be a father to the fatherless in whatever way that happens.

Praying for Cocoa and Faith today.

I agree with everything Dutchoma said. How is it that Dutchoma is always so wise?

I would get in touch with the hospice chaplain. She would understand grieving as a process Don't and I think she would be happy to listen. Also the counsellor is trained to be non judgemental. Do not focus on her.

As for doing things that a deceased loved one would do, I do the same. It brings comfort and in some way honours their memory.

Gosh, so many on this thread are going through the mill at this time. Praying for restorative moments of peace to you all during your times of stress.

I just want to clarify that I recognise that some people can't revisit things that they used to do with loved ones. I don't mean to imply that this is not honouring their memory. I like listening to the classical music pieces that my dear former workplace manager used to play ( he was like a father figure to his staff). However I'd find it difficult to visit his former office because I'd just cry.

you not bloody missing anything good on the archers... [grumbles]

just popped on to say ex has a job offer... hoping he takes it.

Very funny Bes . Hope your ex takes the offer.

Admittedly we had almost stoppen listening anyway, but not once in over two years have I caught up with it.
Hope ex takes the job.