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Philosophy/religion

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cherishing others

27 replies

professornangnang · 07/10/2014 10:14

I'm interested to hear people's opinions on this. I know that there are no easy answers. I am reading a buddhist book at the moment and it says that one of the main aims in life should be to cherish others, not in the sense of loving one's family etc... (which is easy), but in the sense of putting all people first, even those who've wronged you. Clearly, there's a similar sentiment in most religions.
My question is: how does one do this when one has had a very difficult time with other people? How do you get over the hurt and mistrust? How do you look out on the world and think: 'I'm going to cherish everyone, even though I have not always been cherished myself?'
I'm struggling with this although it is my ultimate goal. I've had such a hard time. I've experienced such cruelty that I was pushed to suicide. This wasn't by one person but a number of people in my hometown. I was mercilessly harrassed. Somehow the fact that it was a group effort makes it worse. The repercussions of that haunt me to this day.
I've been betrayed, attacked, treated like dirt and sometimes I feel very old and tired, even though I'm not. I have a family and a life and a mediocre job despite all of this, even though sometimes it's felt like I've been swimming through a tide of . I am very good at my job but I've never been particularly recognised or encouraged by anyone.
I've learned to try and stay under the radar as much as possible and mistrust and be afraid of people. I've tried to protect myself as much as I can but I know that's useless really and I'm totally vulnerable.
I'm wondering how I can get through all this and cherish others? How do other people do it?

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professornangnang · 09/10/2014 19:32

Thank you everyone for replying. Your responses are so helpful and have made me feel more positive Thanks

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professornangnang · 09/10/2014 19:40

That's a good question lovely and pots:( My husband is from the same place and is eager to return. We also know that our family will help us with our DC whereas where we live now, we have no help. So, we're really going for quality of life for DH and DC and I love them. It would be hard to deny them that. If it was up to me we'd go and live in Alaska! I'm churning up inside but I know I have to put them first. I've told DH and he knows all my fears. He said to me: 'Don't worry, I'm with you now, nobody will hurt you.' I don't quite believe it though. My God, once you've seen the ugly side of humanity, it's hard to put rose-tinted spectacles on. To tell you the truth, I feel sick thinking about it.

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