Christianity and Sex Outside Marriage - specifically during separation / after divorce

[NightOfTheCactus]

I've already posted about this, but didn't get many replies, so am posting again but making it more general.

Is there anywhere in the Bible where it says it is wrong to have sex outside of Marriage?

I'm separated from STBXH - have been for a year. The divorce hasn't come through yet. I am in love with someone else (we haven't been seeing one another for long, but it is someone I've known for a long time, so there's a complicated back-story). We've started a relationship, but I feel so conflicted about it because of what it says about you're committing adultery even if you are divorced (and I'm still just separated).

I've talked to people from the Church who are very against my new relationship.

The person I'm in the relationship with is very hurt and I don't feel I can talk about it properly with him, because he just doesn't get it.

Please can someone talk to me? I feel like I'm losing the plot here.

Thank you

I still believe your conflict lays with you knowing what's right but it goes against what you want. If you honour God with this relationship and it's right then God can make it right.

I would be very wary of a church that won't let me help because I am living with a man I am not married to...

And also very wary of a church that takes the Old Testatment literally...

Christianity and Churchianity are very different things...

I would be weary of a church that doesn't hold firm to what the bible says.

I would be wary of churches. Period.

The way I see it (hands up I'm an atheist) there are two possible weddings.

A religious one that isn't legal. A legal one that isn't religious. Some people combine the two in the same ceremony.

It's not that long ago that only C of E weddings and registry office ones were legal if you didn't pay to have a registrar come to your church and do the legal bit. It was quite common for RC, Muslims, Jews to have the legal ceremony a day or two before the 'propper' one.

OK I'm coming to the point now.

A divorce, IMHO is an end to the legal marriage, it is not the end of the religious marriage. The end or the religious bit depends on you, your church, your beliefs etc. I know that for RCs the marriage is only over with the death of one or other.

So forget about the divorce, the legal paperwork and ask yourself about the marriage you had in church (assuming you did).

Is that over? Are you still following your vows? Would sex with this person feel like adultery?

It's a long time since I read the Bible (well bits, I have not read it all) but the only bit I recall is Jesus saying that the only reason for divorce is adultery. Which my take means that if your ex has had sex with anyone else you are no longer married in the eyes of God (but remember I'm coming at this as an outsider)

I know it's selfish, but I really love him, and he really loves me, and it doesn't feel wrong.

What is selfish about that? Two people who love each other wanting to be together?