First Ramadan...any tips?

[ErikNorseman]

Ok I'm not religious at all, but DH is muslim. I have never partaken of Ramadan but this year I think I'm going to give it a try, for the communality and the experience. I don't plan to do it all, TBH he's going away for a week and I won't do it then, and I'm not committing to every day when he is here! I do want to know what all the fuss is about though so. Thankfully I stopped smoking 18 months ago so that's not an issue but honestly, how do you get through the day without a drink? Do you set your alarms and eat and drink at 4am, or do you drink pints before bed? Do you stuff yourselves at 11pm? I couldn't do it how DH does, so he isn't really an example (he stays up late and sleeps late, like 3am - 11am or even later, self employed so no problem) but I have a 9-5 so no good. Please give me some tips!

you eat at 4am, plenty of water, and slow release carbs etc, you wont feel like eating but force yourself. muslims wake at this time for fajr anyway.

at 9pm you break fast with date and water, and light dinner, dont rush and get bloated, slowly and steady does it.

I drink water from evening, till quite late (take some to bed) and a glass in the morning. I also drink tea

I dont eat much in the morning tbh, never really fancy it...........and have rice most evenings (its provided at islamic centre so i dont have to cook most of the month!! ) with a fair amount of salad.

You get used to it after a few days, it isn't easy as such but that is kind of the point.

So you set your alarms for 4am and go back to sleep? I think I will struggle with that as I am a poor sleeper and if I wake up at 4-5 I can't go back to sleep. Still I can give it a go!
I can see myself eating far too much when it comes time to eat!

Lol we supposed to do that every day anyway!

Lol well yes of course maybe I'm not approaching this with quite the right frame of mind it's just that pretty much none of the Muslims I know actually get up to pray so I'm not used to it. Well maybe I can be a good influence on DH!
I reckon if I leave a cereal bar and a banana by the bed with a bottle of water I can probably do it with the minimum of disruption!

You don't actually feel that hungry/thirsty through the day when you don't get your metabolism going by eating or drinking anything first thing in the morning.

Sleeping until 11 AM sounds like cheating a bit I'm pretty sure that the idea is to continue your life as before.

Thanks guys! DH generally sleeps late so it isn't much of a change and I don't think going to bed after work will be an option, even if DH is around to have DS (no guarantee, depends what work he has) I am a shocking sleeper and incapable of having a nap no matter how tired I am.

It isn't an obligation for me, I'm not Muslim as I said, but I really want to try it.

I know people who have wanted to try it to see what it feels like..........not many who have tried more than one year when they don't have too though!

I would suggest a few days together (weekend?) rather than trying once a week or something, it gets easier once you adjust to the routine.

I have also tried it once in my teens to lose weight see what it feels like. It wasn't much fun iirc and I stopped after a few days.

Is it really a strong obligation to eat before dawn? Or is it just that you can't eat after dawn so you'd better. I don't remember anything like your fast won't be "valid" if you don't eat in the hours preceding dawn.

no its emphasised sunnah innit

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: ?Suhoor is not a condition for fasting to be valid, rather it is mustahabb (recommended), because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ?Have suhoor, for in suhoor there is blessing.? (Agreed upon). www.islamqa.com/en/ref/20135/suhoor

That's the one crescent :) thanks, I haven't done it yet, I might totally fail but tbh when I set my mind to something I can usually do it for a while so I'm optimistic. I know at least 3 non Muslims married to Muslims who fast, they enjoy the experience and get a lot out of it. It's also a bit of an attempt to take on more of DH culture. Eid el kbir is a bit of a disappointment here as I'm a vegetarian!

It's really hard to do in the UK in summer!

I did it a few years ago in September/October and discovered that my body has changed its demands since I was a teenager... I seem to really need water now, much more than I did then. I ended up waking at 4am, drinking 4 pints of water and then going back to bed needing to pee like mad at 7am!!

The actual hunger isn't too bad - I found it easy to ignore after the first few days. It really opened my eyes to how much time I idly spend snacking! I kept having to find things to do that didn't involve food prep/consumption

The worst part for me was the dehydration headaches if I didn't drink enough water... it can get so bad that even if you do cave in and drink, you throw it back up very quickly. If I get to that state, I lie down and drink tiny sips of water (barely enough to wet my mouth) every so often until I feel brave enough to try a bit more. I don't recommend it though

There are other things besides just not eating/drinking; you're not meant to swear or think impure thoughts either this is what we were told as kids and so I'm sticking to it. That includes being mean about/to people, so it was also a nice exercise in trying to be a 'good' person.

Btw, I have an aunt who stays up all night in Ramadan and sleeps all day! She wakes up 30min before Iftar and then eats the dinner my cousin has prepared for her... seems to avoid the point of the season to me but what do I know!

Good luck erik, hope you find it an interesting experience :)

crescent - No, I don't think I would fast again. It was a teenage folly, especially since I had no doubt by then that I am an atheist.

DH would sleep all day if he could! He misses his home country during Ramadan too :)

I grew up in the Emirates crescent, so I know what you mean... life becomes centred around sunrise/sunset in a way that it doesn't here! School started late and ended early (with no lunch break), cinemas opened 15 minutes after Iftar and the traffic around that time was insane ah, memories.

erik, I've only ever heard of Eid al-Fitr and Eid al-Adha - is Eid al-Kibr another name for one of them?

No lunch break? Does that mean everyone has to fast? That doesn't sound like one has the choice not to.