To just go to a jehovahs witness meeting?

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One of the older women at work is a Jehovah's Witness. I don't really know what they are but they don't like blood or birthdays. I thought they were just another type of Christian but apparently not.

She keeps asking me to go to a meeting and I keep putting her off. Thinking now that I should just go once and then never again!?

It sounds really shallow but I wouldn't want to give up Christmas!!

Part of me wonders what it would be like. Would they be over friendly? Would they be distant as I am a heathen type? Can't imagine it really.

OliviaLMumsnet - didn't realise there was a religion section! I just looked on the list of popular forums at the bottom of the page.

I was born in 1976 because the world didn't end in 75 after all and the guidance o. Not having children in the time of the end was changed. So that bit worked for me

I've said it before. Some people find real comfort in it and I wish them well. The main things I struggle with are, the fall of man- women are weaker because eve encouraged Adam to rebel, this is also why we have periods, it's a punishment on us all as is pain in childbirth (I think this is mainstream Christian teaching too) and adam being created first means women cannot teach in public unless to other women etc as stated above.

Also I wanted to be educated, and it was actively discouraged, as is reading anything tht may criticise or disagree with the doctrines (that is apostate, and " to the reading of books there is no end and it makes the soul wearisome" or similar from proverbs was quoted at me endlessly). I firmly believe that anything which is true should be open and transparent as it has nothing to fear from scrutiny and comparison and would question anything which does not encourage people to questions, read and learn critical appraisal skills.

However I cannot deny that I have seen people pick themselves up from the gutter through involvement with it so I cannot be judgemental. Just because I can't live that way does not make it wrong for others.

Hmmm I'd avoid. But then I'm related to someone who in her late teens was thrown out of the JWs badly beaten by her DF and ostracised by everyone she knew because she went away on a work training course. They thought she was off getting some nooky apparently.

It was the 70s but regardless of the timing and circumstances, it wasn't a particularly charming approach to parenting!

Oh yes, "spare the rod and spoil the child"

I felt very humbled when the good friend I made at university told me some 6 months into our course that she was a JW. I think I would have reacted towards her very differently, to my shame if I had known.

She never tried to convert me and knowing her and her family made me look at how I judge others a little more.

xeno: I never thought I'd stand up for the JWs (I'm an atheist) but your charges against them are ridiculous, particularly the one about the Bible. There is no definite version of the Bible - the whole thing was put together by committee a few hundred years into the existence of the Christian Church, with certain books being kept in and others being left out. The same thing again with the advent of Protestantism - the Catholic bible has the Apocrypha, which the Protestant version doesn't have.

As for "i would say the key thing is having a relationship with Jesus, it is not about rules and people telling you what to think." Well, I can think of a whole load of counter-examples to that without too much difficulty. In fact, almost the entire history of the Christian Church for the past 2,000 years has been concerned with rules and telling people what to think. Why do you think Protestants burned Catholics at the stake and vice versa? What were the crusades about? Why was the Catholic church involved in forcibly removing babies from their mothers? What do you think the Magdalene laundries were all about? Have you ever read James Joyce?

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OliviaLMumsnet - didn't realise there was a religion section! I just looked on the list of popular forums at the bottom of the page.

You do now
Have moved it for you now - think it's not really AIBU, is it?
Thanks M Towers

Personally I rather enjoy coming across the occasional religious thread in AIBU.

There are many AIBU threads which could potentially fit elsewhere. Recent threads have been about homebuying, bullying, uninvited guests, MN "in jokes" and Barry Manilow.

They could go in the Property, Education/Bullying, Etiquette, Chat and Music sections, in just the same way that this thread could go in Religion. So I'd vote for keeping them all or moving them all :o

Surely it's no less of an AIBU than half the other things on the AIBU section? Or does MN see religion as an exception for some reason?

Xeno, your post about JWs not being Christians and having no grace mercy or compassion made me choke on my tea!
Firstly, the dictionary definition of Christian is 'someone who believes in Jesus Christ.
Secondly, have you any idea of the horrors carried out in the name of Christianity in the last 2000 years? As I and others have said, Christianity is responsible for the murder, persecution, shunning and general abuse of MILLIONS Of people.
Catholics killing Protestants, Protestants killing Catholics, everybody killing Jews. Ever heard of the Crusades? The Irish conflict? The problems in Israel? the proper Christians have ridden roughshod oner everyone and anyone who stood in their way since the minute they got established.
Jehovah's witnesses don't go to war. EVER. They are among the first into disaster zones. They support each other. Did you know that thousands of JWs were killed in Hitler's concentration camps? They do a lot LESS harm than other Christian bodies, and have plenty of those qualities that you mentioned.

A Christian is not someone who just believes in Jesus Christ, it is someone who has given up their earthly lives to follow him.

A JW does not really meet this definition. No non-trinitarian does. You have to believe in the Godhead (not necessarily understand it), and be behind Christian atonement theology.

I read that post Claire, but most of it was beyond me, could you simplify please?

Google is your friend, cat

Having worked as a JW in the afiermath of a hurricane, I have to say, they only help themselves. And they most definitely were not the first in. When 9/11 happened, even though they're headquartered in Brooklyn, it took them until someone wrote a newspaper article that mentioned what various religious groups were doing to help mentioning they JW's had done nothing to do anything, and their "help" was handing out a few cases of bottled water. While the congregations will have resolutions to send out money to various disaster areas sometimes, I've been in many congregations when people were obviously struggling, and they did nothing to help them. Unlike many religions, they do nothing in the way of charity for anyone else, and rationalize it with saying that preaching is the only way to help people.

My grandparents are very old, and my grandmother has been hospitalized many times, in the past few years and my grandfather knows nothing about taking care of the house, and even though they've been in their congregation many years since it was founded, (he was the Presiding Overseer, substitute CO, and the renamed COBOE until he got too old) nobody came once to help, and when my mom and aunt went back to work, my grandfather had to begrudgingly resort to letting me come and help do their shopping, cleaning and laundry since nobody else did.

There is a lot of crap on this thread about JW's!!

WhiteShores - I really am intrigued. Can you not just stop going to the meetings without being disfellowshipped? How do you deal with your children at school being witnesses? Does your DH know how you feel?

Sorry for so many questions but I do not know how you keep going if you really do not believe it anymore.

ClaireAll Do you really want google to have the final say? It does bring up the strangest stuff -- last religion based search I did brought up multiple conspiracy theories, some recipes, book stores, a parody site, a couple dating sites, sites to convince people to convert away and/or hate the religion in question, and I think maybe one or two nice informative sites.

calzone I could stop going to the meetings and become 'inactive', but I would still have to keep all the JW rules or I would be reported by my own family and be disfellowshipped (they would believe they were doing it for my own good).

I have actually become inactive in the past, but this creates such a stir in the family and disapproval/pleading (all coming from a very genuine fear for my eternal life), that it is simply easier to attend, especially since I have to live my life in accordance anyway.

My husband is not a JW (JWs are allowed to marry outside the faith although this is very frowned upon). And thankfully this gives me an acceptable 'excuse' for our child to be non-JW (we have one teenager and one on the way).

As the male, he is the 'head of the house' according to JW beliefs, and so in their eyes I (and our children) are in subjection to him, which gives me a very easy out as far as they are concerned.

In short, yes I could stop going to the meetings. But I cannot stop living a JW lifestyle (which includes minimal socialising with non-JWs), and so I would have a very lonely life if I did.

The meetings are really just a drop in the ocean and not my biggest problem at all. The hardest part is essentially lying about who I am and what I believe to everyone I love. I am constantly weighing up whether the path I walk is really the lesser of two evils.

OP - Read whiteshore's posts consider if that is the lifestyle you truly want to buy into.
If you are ok with that then fine and dandy.

Whiteshores :(

Just to clarify, it is only willful breaking of official JW 'rules' that will result in disfellowshipping (usually this is the final sanction after a series of increasing social sanctions, unless the offence is particularly 'serious').

Meeting attendance in itself is not an absolute rule (though obviously highly encouraged).

Whiteshores - I hope you find the strength to leave and find what it is in life that will make YOU happy :( (having scanned upthread and read your other posts)

Thank you Threadwatcher.

Which parts do you not believe then?
What does your DH think you should do?
Were you not shunned when you married your DH?

calzone I don't believe any of it, and if I were to leave would be no religion at all.

My DH never really understood the situation, and used to constantly advise me to leave until he saw what happened to my mother when she did. Now he is extremely supportive and sympathetic.

No I was not shunned because I did not break any of the JW rules (JWs are allowed to marry outside the faith although strongly discouraged).

Ironically, if I had been caught dating him alone, or associating with a group of non-JW people (in order to date him), I could have been disciplined for this, and ultimately disfellowshipped/shunned if I did not cease. This did not happen because the entirety of our courting happened through the workplace.

I should add that because of the dating/association rules, nobody even knew my DH existed until we announced our wedding date.

The majority of my family did not attend in protest (although some did, they are allowed to).

Do you think that the JWs are happy?