new year's resolution: go back to mass?

[mrsmplus3]

i am catholic and was brought up going to mass. it didnt bother me too much but didnt really go as a teenager. i started going again as an adult and really liked it ie i enjoyed the hymns and got comfort from the familiarity of it all.

however, my husband and kids (all catholic) dont really like going. i used to make them go most sundays until recently i stopped MAKING them go and gave them all the choice. i ended up going on my own while they enjoyed a leisurely sunday morning.

i now havent been in months and am beginning to feel a bit guilty. more than that im a bit sad that were not all going as a family. i mean, what am i teaching my kids then? whats the point in being catholic if we dont go to mass? and also, as life is so difficult sometimes i feel having a faith is a wonderful gift my parents gave me. whenever im struggling with something all i need to do is say my prayers at night in bed and i honestly fall asleep in peace. i want to pass this on to my kids without having to force them into it.

so my question is should i make my family go to mass every sunday with me or just lead by example and go myself?

thanks in advance.

Do you pray with your dcs at bedtime? If not, I think I'd start there rather than a service at a time they might resent. Or if they're not the age that you tuck them up in bed any more, some other way to bring your faith into your home: a book of Bible stories to read together or a CD of music that might start them thinking about what a personal faith means to others? There are some ideas on this thread if you're interested in the music idea.

How old are your kids?
Perhaps it is better to lead by example, and then be positive about the experience, talk to them about how you pray and about how your faith has helped (I find it hard to do that but very useful when I do), and let them see that you see going to Mass on a Sunday as a positive experience, not a chore?

Mrs - similar to me. DH, not Catholic, but DCs are. They have nil interest - more, they seemed to have turned away big time. I didn't force it on them - two confirmed through own choices. One wouldn't go through with the programme (though he is at a RC school).

I think I agree with AT - show/lead by example. Occasionally, I tell DCs that such and such a thing happened by the grace of God (or such words) - and I've learnt to ignore their 'Oh, my God, she's off again' -

I belong to a prayer group - mums from the Church - which is nice and I find I'm not the only one whose kids appear to have lost interest. I'm intending to go to Mass more often this year - though I have a soft spot for the Church my DH prefers/was brought up in - the URC and happily accommodate him too so we can occasionally go to church together.

My DCs will go into the nearby Cathedral to light candles for family who've passed on - I think that shows that deep down they don't really think that what we've got now is all we will ever have ...

thanks ladies.

my kids are 15, 6 and 3. we dont really pray at night but sometimes say god bless so and so if someone is ill and we said happy birthday to jesus on christmas norning but we usually go without fail on christmas day and i cant quite believe we didnt go this year, thats just wrong (to me).

anyway, i told my husband i posted about it and asked what he thought and he too said hes thinking about it, which is good news.

i think our problem is that although deep down we do believe in our faith, so much bad stuff has happened in life that i think were both a bit pissed off and wonder what good can really come from having a faith.

but its just not sitting well with me that my kids arent going to mass, i feel guilty and think i will definitely lead by example.

Think your dh is getting off lightly. It's much harder to enforce this sort of thing as a mum than as a dad. I presume it's cos we usually insist on all the routine, boring stuff so the kids are waiting for a chance to resist

I have a similar difficulty taking the 3 dc to Mass. It is often, and genuinely, a near-impossibility. And physically manhandling them into the car then spending the whole hour with threats and telling-off, really didn't help. But dh is atheist, so at least I don't feel like he 'should' be helping.

Can you find a church with enough kids that your younger ones at least would want to attend? My kids love church if they've got others to play with and a fun Sunday School to attend.