Does having a 'Christian' job mean you are judged more?

[HaveALittleFaithBaby]

I just wondered about people's experiences of this. I'm a nurse in a hospital. I'm a Christian, my colleagues know I am and it's never been an issue. Sparked some interesting chats on nights!
I have a working relationship with one of the chaplains. Obviously being a Christian is essential to his job but he's not very....Christian! He's quite challenging to work with and lots of people have made comments like 'If he wasn't a chaplain, you'd never know he was a Christian'.
Do you think people in these kinds of positions are judged more? Are we harsher on them? Or should they be making a big effort to set a good example?
Any thoughts?

Yes, I think Christians in the workforce are held to a higher standard.

The good example depends on what he is perceived to be doing that is wrong. A lot of people expect Christians to be pushovers and get uppity when they realise that most are not.

Was certainly judged harshly by some when my son misbehaved and I was a curate.

Now we have a dx it had improved, so has moving to a more friendly place :)

People also make assumtions

You don't have to be Xtian to be a chaplian; I think it's Glasgow Uni who have a Humanist chaplain.

No people generally do not interpret others' behaviour in a segmented way. The 'for a Christian' bit is the cherry on the cake, for your chaplain. People pushing away hope to meet pushovers. It has nothing to do with the Christian bit.

That said, the temptation to be obsessed nowadays with form over substance is almost overwheming. Hence our need for dx to legitimise behaviour. Dx are complex and unique, but we treat them as one single excuse. Understanding and the commitment to live together fruitfully is more useful than forgiveness, I find. Usually hardest to do when starting with oneself, too.

Surely if he has been employed as a Christian chaplain then he should display Christian values?

What is his job description?

He is a Rev (I just checked). Yes he's a senior chaplain in fact. I struggle with this - his attitude is pretty off - he basically implies I'm lying quite a lot! I don't think he realises I'm a Christian. I want to support him - as my brother in Christ so to speak - but he is perhaps the individual I find it most difficult to work with - and I work in a wide field and interact with lots of people!

You don't have to be perfect to be a christian. I'm afraid even the clergy are sinners!

I'm not saying I expect any Christian to be perfect I'm certainly not!! I just find it concerning that people say you'd have no idea he was a Christian if they didn't know his job role...

Is he doing a reasonable job as a chaplain though, whether or not he measures up to your expectation of what a christian should be like?

He does more teaching and organising volunteers rather than bedside care...yes I suppose he does a good job. Just rubs me up the wrong way! Just goes to show we can be friends with everyone even if they share your faith.

I can't imagine the pressure people in roles like that must be under - I'm under enough pressure when people find out I am a bog-standard christian: people can be quite weird when they find out (a bit like Basil Fawlty behaving oddly around the psychiatrist staying in his guesthouse!). I should imagine you could multiply that by a few thousand if someone is actually a member of the cloth?

that said, is there anybody you could have a word with about his attitude/behaviour? re the comments that people make about him generally. Completely confidential, of course. He may not realise how he is coming across, may be mortified that things have got out of hand? It may not be appropriate to approach him personally (I doubt it would be) but you could see if you could talk to a superior of some kind. Test the water though, you don't want it to backfire on you (or him).

I hate to state the obvious, but you could pray about him, ask God to show you His heart towards him. I read something the other day by somebody or other (hopeless!) - a famous christian from bygone days - who was about to pray for a vicar he knew who was curmodgenly (terrible sp), which had been affecting the congregation; and he was just about to launch into "and you know how awful so-and-so can be.." when he felt God stop him, saying that the 'awful' vicar was dearly loved by God. So whoever-it-was started to praise and thank God for the vicar's good points, the things he was getting right. Voila, there was a complete turnaround in this vicar.

I'm not sure who I could even speak to about his behaviour. I don't know if I would, I think it's more of a personality clash than anything. I am, and will continue to pray. I just hindered if, in an ironic way, I'm.harsher on him than non-Christians. I probably am which perhaps says more about me! I'll keep praying :)

His attitude sounds unhelpful, but his working pattern sounds quite normal for senior chaplain

Working as a chaplaincy assistant I was on the wards far more than my boss who was often in meetings etc. She did do the 6am Communion round, last in the country she told me, I wonder why :)

If his main job is working with the staff, then these are the people he should be pastor too. . . .

'If he wasn't a chaplain, you'd never know he was a Christian'

There must be more things unknown than known to all of us. But God certainly knows whether he's a Christian. I have no idea what his values are, only that his behaviour does not suit you. The world holds many who exclude others who do not behave as they wish. That is definitely not a Christian value.

Springydaffs makes a good point about praying. You/he may be blessed with more insight and a good way forward.

'If he wasn't a chaplain, you'd never know he was a Christian
It's not me that said that - it was my non-Christian colleagues. I am praying! I have to work with him and I'd like a more positive relationship with him so I'll keep praying.

I think people definitely hold you to a higher standard when they know you're a Christian - partly because I think a lot of people misunderstand what being a Christian is about, ie that you'll be nice all the time and should always help everyone whatever the cost to you .

But also yes, my Mum was a minister and we were always expected to behave perfectly. Mum always said she thought it was better when we didn't because it showed everyone she was human too!

Yes there are certainly higher expectations. Being married to a member of the clergy can be interesting, people have gasped if I let out the odd expletive and there are those who expect our dc to be more well behaved than usual (shame they are blatantly not so) People definitely expect a standard of behaviour from dh and expect him to be somehow more holy, they don't quite believe it if they see him having a beer and shouting at the footie like any other bloke.

However saying that Paul does specify that behaviour in an elder should be exemplary, which I do actually agree with to a certain extent, not that they should act all holier than thou but just that they should take holiness incredibly seriously and act as an example - but also being seen to be human and flawed like everyone else and not be afraid to be vulnerable in letting this be seen.