Feeling annoyed with myself

[hiddenhome]

I am trying hard to be a good Christian, but yesterday some old woman drove into dh's car whilst he was going over the roundabout and has totalled it It's a complete write off. Dh is okay, but has a few bruises and a sore back - no permanent injury, thank God.

I know I should be grateful, forgiving towards the old lady and generally cope better, but I have been horrible about it. Shouting and swearing about her carelessness, not giving a stuff about the fact she was shocked and had injured her knee, ranting and raving about the poor car as I was so attached to it.

I always seem to 'revert to type' when things happen and struggle to act in a Christian manner.

I feel really ashamed now, but I find it difficult to forgive and be less harsh to others who make mistakes.

Don't be so hard on yourself. Now you've calmed down maybe you can send her a letter of apology (once your sure the insurance has been sorted in your favour).

Oh, I wasn't shouting at her. It was when dh returned home and told me what had happened that I lost the plot in the kitchen I wasn't in the car when the accident happened.

Oh I see - in which case no one harmed. It's good to vent. Now with hindsight and space you can be forgiving.

Thank you I shall try not to react like this in the future.

Good luck Hope your car gets fixed soon.

You're already feeling sorry. She will be feeling bad I imagine and lose her no-claims etc. Her DH is ranting at her carelessness .

I'd try to fix on fact that your DH is OK and not badly injured. could have been worse.....

sounds quite normal to me, you don't get a sudden personality change just because you are a christian, things change with time.. and not completely whilst we are still alive.

people react in different ways to big events... depending on personality/stress levels/sleepdeprivation.. (all 3 in my case)

love your name...

Being a Christian is more about trying to be a goodperson than actually being one.

that's why we have the confession and absolution part in Every church service!

I know I'm being flippant, but I am also makign a serious point.
the whole point of us having Jesus in our lives is so that we have someone to lean on everytime we act like we think we shouldn't.

It's like an unconditional love that protects us, and forgives us when we get it wrong.

There is nothing wrong with anger. Anger is actually a good thing to release (imagine if you didn't - you would end up being very bitter and angry all the time, or explode once or descend into mental illness)
Once you have released your anger, then you can look at the situation with new eyes, and make amends to those who got in the way of the strom.

Please don't feel bad about it - accept that you haven't handled it how you would wish, and move on.
:)

(oh, PS - i know what shouting and screaming is like. I've done my fair share.
Even on tuesday, at the PCC meeting, I vented my anger when confronted with an issue. It's not a bad thing - it's just how you handle it afterwards that's the main thing)

I can be hot headed and act in ways I'm not proud of also. I feel better when I remember that the disciples were far from perfect too.

Thank you for all the replies

As it turned out, it was a heavy dose of pmt that was making me rant and rave as well