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Original poster

So how exactly do yuo explain to your 9 year old ds he misses out on a trip to a Sikh temple because you are devout Christians and how can hat be right?

52 replies

DrNortherner · 06/04/2011 07:32

DS's clas visiting a Sikh temple today. His friends family are extremely devout Christians and he is being taken out of school for the day.

Now I am curious as to how they explain this to their son. As far as I am concerned should kids not be encouraged to learn respect and tolerance for other peoples religion?

I find this attitude totally bigoted actually.

Thoughts?

OP posts:
Original poster
DrNortherner · 06/04/2011 07:32

AAArgh. Should preview.

OP posts:
meditrina · 06/04/2011 07:45

Perhaps you should ask them.

But you might get a more enlightening answer if you do not begin with the assumption they are bigots. Nice.

Bucharest · 06/04/2011 07:47

Well, in all honesty, what are you supposed to think they are?

Original poster
DrNortherner · 06/04/2011 07:47

I hope to be enlightened meditrina, really I do......

OP posts:
Original poster
DrNortherner · 06/04/2011 07:48

Trying to think of a valid reason for not allowing your kid to go to a temple....

OP posts:
meditrina · 06/04/2011 07:50

Thanks. Please post when you have asked them!

After all, no-one on here can supply you with an insight into another specified family in this way.

VivaLeBeaver · 06/04/2011 07:51

Isn't there a bit in the bible that says "you shall not worship false Gods/prophets"

So maybe they are using that as their reason? If they are very strict they may follow everything the bible says.

But I think you're right that children should be brought up to respect other religions, etc.

meditrina · 06/04/2011 07:53

We do not know if this family uses this verse in their reasoning.

DrNorthener: are you seeing them on the school run today? When will you be able to ask them????

Jogon · 06/04/2011 07:54

Perhaps they aer narrow mindeed, intolerant, blinkered twats bigots?

meditrina · 06/04/2011 07:59

Perhaps they're not? Do you know them? Why do you judge them? This isn't AIBU, it's philosophy. How is it possibly right to make wild guesses?

DrNorthener? When can you ask?

You are describing atypical behaviour. Only you can now lead us to true enlightenment on this now.

georgie22 · 06/04/2011 08:00

When I was confirmed in a C of E church we had confirmation classes where the vicar took us to other religion's places of worship. I find it hard to understand why people are unable to respect other religions. Perhaps if there was a little more mutual respect between religions many of the world's conflicts may never have occurred. It would be interesting to know the rationale for their decision.

exoticfruits · 06/04/2011 08:08

I think that it is highly unusual-church schools study other religions and visit other places of worship-it is in the curriculum. The must be very narrow minded and I wouldn't call it a Christian attitude. It will probably mean the DC will become an atheist if they are so controlling.

PrettyCandles · 06/04/2011 08:15

It's perfectly possible to be a practicising member of a religion and still be tolerant of other religions. I have known families like this, and their attitude was something along the lines of:

Our religion is the right one for us, their religion is the right one for them. We can be friends and go to each other's houses, etc. We can learn about their religion. But we don't need to go to their place of worship in order to do so - textbooks, films, and talking with them are perfectly adequate.

IMO there's nothing wrong with being different and accepting difference. It's when difference becomes an excuse or reason for denying people their rights that it becomes bigotry and unacceptable.

meditrina · 06/04/2011 08:15

We really have no idea what is going inside this family. There are, as well, reasons for missing a day of school that are unconnected with the curriculum:

  • piano exam (ABRSM about to change syllabus, so cannot be rearranged/postponed).
  • Specialist medical appointment
  • family reason (eg returnee/departer from/to Afghanistan (big roulement underway)

DrNorthener: when will you be able to ask for the enlightenment you were seeking a few posts above?

hocuspontas · 06/04/2011 08:22

When my children visited a Sikh temple a mother kept her child off. It was from a position of ignorance though because she thought that the children would be expected to pray. Afterwards she realised she had made a mistake. Maybe something like that here?

notyummy · 06/04/2011 08:27

It is interesting isn't it? My dd in reception has a friend who is a Jehovahs Witness (this is a C of E primary) and she doesn't go to worship or participate in any of the 'other faith' activities the class has done (stuff around Diwali and Hannukah so far to my knowledge.) DD said that when they sang 'holy songs' Hmm or Xmas carols that she sits listening to 'special stories' with big headphones on so she can't hear any of what is going on.

Sounds like she is missing out to me tbh.

As this is a 'one off' for this little boy, it may be different.

exoticfruits · 06/04/2011 08:27

I find it a very big coincidence that they are having a piano exam etc on the same day. I would say they have decided that their DS will be a Christian-a bit misguided as it is completely up to him and shutting out other views can't control what he thinks.

meditrina · 06/04/2011 08:31

We cannot sadly draw that conclusion, exoticfruits, and indeed neither does OP actually write their is a causal link.

DrNorthener - any more information yet? It would be a much more useful debate if we new what we were actually debating!!!!!

Librashavinganotherbiscuit · 06/04/2011 08:35

I'm with PrettyCandles on this if this is the only slightly odd behaviour displayed by them with regards to other religions then I think the word "bigot" is very strong. You can teach children about other beliefs without actually going to their places of worship (which I find a bit voyeuristic anyway, as if it's a tourist attraction)

Librashavinganotherbiscuit · 06/04/2011 08:38

Actually you could probably argue it's more respectful not invading someone elses place of worship if you don't share their beliefs.

exoticfruits · 06/04/2011 08:42

I may be wrong meditrina, but I would put money on my interpretation and feel quite safe and I bet you wouldn't wager £100 that they had a pressing engagement on the same day!

They are not invading someone else's place of worship-it wouldn't be open to school groups if that was so!!

Librashavinganotherbiscuit · 06/04/2011 08:50

Just because they are open to school groups has to mean everyone who uses the place for its intended purpose is comfortable with dozens of school children traipsing around it. And I am not sure why just because a child does visit a religious place that means they are somehow tolerant or open-minded, tbh most of the children are probably thinking hurrah a day out of the classroom. You can learn PLENTY about other religions without going to their places of worship. Or do you think everyone needs to go to Germany to learn about WW2?

plantsitter · 06/04/2011 08:50

meditrina, I think Dr Northerner has taken a situation she knows has happened (visit to Sikh Temple, devout Christian kid kept off) and is using it to have a discussion about what she has inferred is the reason (that as devout Christians they are not happy with the visit). This inferred reason isn't necessarily the correct one, no, but the discussion of the principle is more interesting than finding out the specific circumstances of this family.

I think you know this but are deliberately being a bit terrier-ish (in my opinion) about not being judgmental.

BoattoBolivia · 06/04/2011 08:51

This is a real problem in primary schools. We are supposed to visit different places of worship, not to pray but just to gain some understanding of how different people practise their religion. Most places of worship actively encourage this, by the way.
I can honestly say that every time my school has organised a trip, there is at least one child who does not come because their parents disapprove. (they usually tell us, so I am not making assumptions). I always try to talk to the parents and explain what we will be doing, but, yes, it is normally bigotry. I have had some fairly horrible comments.
This is not confined to any one religion either. I think it is very sad and short sighted.

Librashavinganotherbiscuit · 06/04/2011 08:51

Actually the Germany/WW2 think is a stupid comparison but the rest of the post still stands.