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Philosophy/religion

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"The Big Silence" - did anyone watch it?

31 replies

wisteriawoman · 01/11/2010 21:30

Has anyone seen "The Big Silence"? on BBC2 - if you haven't check it on BBC iplayer. Basically here's the synopsis:

"Abbot Christopher Jamison, a Benedictine monk, believes that he can teach five ordinary people the value of silent meditation, so they can make it part of their everyday lives."

It's a 3 part series and the final programme is this Friday - if you get a mo it's really worth watching. Also, here's the website - www.growingintosilence.com/ and there's a book you can buy which teaches people how to "enter the silence".

Certainly the programme is of interest to anyone of any faith or none. WOuld love to know what others think.... if you ever saw "The Monastery" a few years ago then its the same idea.

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MaryBS · 02/11/2010 08:22

I've recorded it, haven't had chance to watch it yet. I love meditation, I find it a great way to deal with stress.

DandyDan · 02/11/2010 09:01

I would have watched it but they have put it on at a rubbish time - Friday night at 7.30pm on BBC2 - when I have other commitments. The previous series was very good indeed and although they have recommissioned the idea, they've downgraded it by its scheduling.

MrsCadwallader · 02/11/2010 09:23

Yes, I've been watching it. I've found it really inspiring, and have been actively trying to work a bit more silence (or as near to it as I can get) into my life.

I'll be interested to see how they get on back in the 'real' world on next week's programme - Jon's comment in week one about how quickly the experience becomes diluted once you are back in your normal life was spot on - on the rare occasions I make it to one of the quiet church services (the early said Eucharist when I actually get to sit and listen to the sermon and have some quiet prayer time) I feel exactly the same as Jon did! For me it has really emphasised how much I need the regular 'top up' of quiet reflection.

I'm glad other people are watching it and enjoying it :) (though, as Dandy Dan said, it's a really awkward time in the schedule. God Bless Sky+ is all I can say Grin)

wisteriawoman · 02/11/2010 19:58

Yep, I agree with your comments about the crap scheduling for this prog. DandyD - do try and get it on BBCiplayer -it's worth it.
I've just ordered the book, I'll report back when I get it.
After seeing the first two episodes I felt inspired to go to the Quakers and get an hour's worth of silence. (Blimey it was hard doing just one hour! )
WW

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stigofthedump · 09/11/2010 21:40

Wisteria, I've just watched the second one on i-player, really inspired too, connecting back to quiet times, so easy to squash out of busy life. Let us know how the book goes. My dads partner has been to Beunos a few times and finds it an amazing place, think I'd really struggle.

serin · 10/11/2010 22:26

I would like it better if someone other than Fr Christopher Jamison presented it! Met him in Walsingham over the summer and he scowled at DS2 for crossing his path and refused to look at me when I tried to apologise Hmm

We were in a car park at the time so not like he was disturbing Mass or anything.

There was a huge cloud in the sky so I wished it would rain on him and rain of biblical proportions came down Blush

I am going to hell aren't I?

MrsCadwallader · 11/11/2010 05:34

Wisteria - what book is it you've ordered? I've searched on Amazon but didn't find anything- is there one connected to the series?

I watched the last episode last night and (again) found it very moving and (again) found it interesting how people will search for different ways to express the same thing (or more specifically, how people are reluctant to call the thig they are experiencing 'God'. I loved Fr Jamison's comment to Helen: 'The God you don't believe in doesn't exist'. I think that all the time when in conversation with skeptics!)

newbeliever · 11/11/2010 12:13

I live fairly close to Worth Abbey. They offer retreat weekends which you can book yourself onto and also retreat days - they are very reasonable (you take a long a packed lunch) - I've treated myself a couple of times now both my children are at school. It is amazing to even just take a day out to reflect and develop your relationship with God. Have a look at their website if you are interested, all the details are on there.

WisteriaWoman · 11/11/2010 20:38

MrsC - You can order the book from this website:
www.growingintosilence.com/ Really good website - lots of interesting articles/ info.
The book is £6- the exercises are interesting - not that I've done any yet!
(I found the website on the BBC iplayer website)

S- sorry that Father C was a bit grumpy-when you saw him. TBH by episode 3 I found him a bit Hmm holier than thou but I also thought provoking. Personally I would like Father Timothy Radcliffe OP to present some of these type of progs - he's v good, funny and human. (See him on You Tube or just Google him)

Newbie - a few years ago I took DD on a family retreat week to Worth. DD was about 2 years old and we had a wonderful time, everyone was v welcoming. I enjoyed it even though I'm a "resting" / well rested catholic.

As for the tv prog - I reckon I'm most like Essie - all chat and too busy being busy to find time for silence and my lovely DH (aetheist) is the most silent and reflective member of the household. Sound familiar??!

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newbeliever · 11/11/2010 23:07

WisteriaW - ooh I did see that on their website, was that a camping thing? I can totally empathise with your comments re being too busy to find time for silence my DH (not sure how i'd class him not aetheist but not a Christian either Confused) seems to be able to carve out a fair amount of silent, reflective time. Whereas, i crave for some time to read my bible, pray or meditate but always seem so busy, or on Mumsnet Blush perhaps that's what I should be doing now rather than surfing on here Grin

MrsCadwallader · 12/11/2010 07:23

Wisteria - thanks, that's a lovely site, duly bookmarked! I have also ordered the book - I think it's something my mum's Bible study group would enjoy so I might let them look at it if I can bear to part with it Wink

I agree, too, that I most identified with the Mum on the programme and have been actively trying to find ways to be more 'still' (if not actually silent Hmm) since watching the programme. And yes, NB I think one of the most successful ways of doing that is to spend less time online!!!Blush Grin

Pan · 12/11/2010 22:45

MrsC - I too loved that comment " he doesn't exist.." such a good thing to think on. And I watched the episodes repeatedly.

I am sooo tempted to try for a silent retreat for 8-10 days. A friend has done one (Budhist) for 10 days and we talk about it from time to time.

WisteriaWoman · 13/11/2010 08:23

Newbie - re family retreat at Worth - no it wasn't camping, we stayed in the guest house. It was about 4 years ago but from memory there were about 10 of us. As a single parent I felt v welcomed - I was a bit worried I would feel a bit of an outsider.

Am def going to watch Big Silence again as I really want to find out how to do silence in RL

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newbeliever · 13/11/2010 15:36

WisteriaW - that's interesting, a guest house would be more my thing than camping Grin. Feel quite tempted to go on one of their day retreats again now talking about it on here. Smile

mosschops30 · 13/11/2010 15:46

The first series they did The Monastery inspried me to go to Worth for a retreat.
Have now been several times for autumn retreat, health workers retreat and finding sanctuary retreat. Have also done private retreats there with friends I have met on other retreats.
Very reasonable about £130 for a whole weekend including all meals and single room

I havent been for about 2 years now but am definately going back after watching this series. I quite fancy the 'silence' one they are running in January.

I have to say that as a sceptic initially, the magic of being at Worth completely floored me. I found the monks to be vey honest, non-judgemental and really quite clued up about the real world (some of them even have real jobs Shock. Fr Roderick is my favourite and such a very sensitive man, would have made someone a lovely dh (as Ive told him many times Grin) what a waste Grin

Loved this series although found the gobby woman vey annoying, thought he was very honest with her at the end.

Sorry you found Abbot Christopher a bit sniffy, I havent found him like that, although Fr. James (the Worth parish priest) really is the great one with children

Pan · 13/11/2010 15:52

which was the gobby woman? The unemployed Head of HR??

mosschops30 · 13/11/2010 15:55

no the lone with kids who did a million jobs and netball. I kept thinking 'just shut the hell up'!!!! Grin (although I am probably just like her).
Just thought the way she would wear a sign round her neck and at home asking her family to be silent and then mouthing to her dh and kids instead of talking as if that still counted as silence Hmm
I was glad he told her that she was trying to 'grab' it which is what shen was doing.

This from someone who cant find any peace at all in the day at the moment so I have no room to talk. Also why Id like to do the silent retreat

Pan · 13/11/2010 16:04

ah yes, her. Iwas thinking she was enjoying her 'busyness' and she did need to be with Mr Cool as anyoneelse wouldstruggle with her activity. I did think she loved her own hype and celebrated in it.

have been scouring the sites for a place for a week or so, Either Buhdist or Christian.

mosschops30 · 13/11/2010 16:33

pan go to Worth, you will love it. It feels strange to go backn into the big wide world even after a weekend there. Its so lovely to have no phones, tv or internet for a while Smile

WisteriaWoman · 14/11/2010 09:02

Yes I agree with your comments about Essie - the chatty one. I couldn't understand why she didn't just go upstairs to a bedroom and be quiet instead of making everyone else be silent. According to the Big Silence booklet you can do an exercise which blocks out the noise when you are trying to be silent so why didn't she just practice that. (Buddhists do this all the time with meditation..)

.And WHY did she take her DD to church when he didn't want to go - I doubt he'll ever go again. BUT that said she was the most like me so that's prob why I liked her the most.

Liked your comments about Worth. I think Fr Roderick was the one who said to me"there's no such thing as a lapsed catholic just a resting one." Since I'm still v much resting rather practising I've really valued that comment because it seems so nice and welcoming - (not "them and us" attitude which I'd expected).

So Pan - if you can - do get to Worth. ALso have a look at this website as it lists retreat centres...
www.growingintosilence.com/
What part of the country are you in??

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Pan · 14/11/2010 12:25

yes, a very rested catholic here....though the strength of reaction to the pope's visit, esp. on here, brought me back to old 'battles'!Smile.

WW - am in Glossop, North Derbyshire, which makes Worth a bit difficult.

I am lucky in that I am (literally) surrounded by meditators and people who try to take care of their deeper beings, their souls? We have been talking a lot a while and agree it is important to have a 'framework', and in the UK it appears to be a choice, loosely, between Buddhist or Christianity. Next Sunday we are off to Gorton Monastery in Manchester as there is a non-denominational meditation session at 12 noon, and each Sunday.

Looking at the differences between being in silence, praying and meditation.

btw I did read the record of Nick from The Monastery' programme. This was v. wordy and overly structured, I found he wass looking for someone to write "tick. Well done!". Also there is nothing wrong with 'spiritual shopping' - thought it was pretty elitist, excluding stuff, but I guess it's just a matter of taste.

mosschops30 · 14/11/2010 15:22

pan my mum is in derbyshire and met me at Worth by train so its doo-able (she wont even drive to wales to see us).
Was nick the one who became some sort of vicar after the programme? I think the most interesting stories were those of the advertising guy and the irish guy who'd been in prison.
I always prefer those who start by saying 'this is a load of old tosh' and end up being completely transformed, much like the businessman in this series who was quite confrontational at the start with Abbot Christopher and has now changed his life.

Thats how I was when I went to worth, i wanted the answers to all those questions that ive battled with in the past about catholicsm and they did. I am now a catholic but I dont go to Mass here at hoime because I hate the self-riteous, self-satisfied, cliquey attitude of our local church. If Im away on holiday I will always go to Mass. Some would say not going to Mass makes me not a catholic, but thats their opinion.

wisteria it probably was. Fr. Rob always strikes me as the sort of person you can tell anything to (and Ive told him lots) but he will always find the goodness, and the positive. Like I say, what a waste Grin

WisteriaWoman · 15/11/2010 20:54

MossChops - I love your comments about Father Rod - totally outrageous. Actually I remember in The MOnastery tv series they asked one monk about sexual desire and he said "it never goes until they hit the last nail into your coffin" !!

Pan - have you ever tried the Quakers - they're great for silence and they fact they accept anyone is always a great help.

If anyone is interested - here is an interesting article about doing retreats by yourself at home! (It's written from a Buddhist perspective)
www.tricycle.com/practice/your-life-your-practice

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WisteriaWoman · 15/11/2010 20:55

Here's the link again -

www.tricycle.com/practice/your-life-your-practice

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Miffster · 19/11/2010 20:05

I loved that programme, and afterwards spent an hour every day in silence for a week (on mat leave so was possible) and it felt wonderful, like a shower for the psyche.

Silence on my own is one thing, silence with other people is weird, I always tune into people breathing/swallowing and it makes me uncomfortable, it's so noisy. Eating in shared silence would drive me mad, I think. I don't know how monks do it.

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