So sad, what should I do?

[dollparts]

I have a 6 month old staff, we are coming to the end of her first set of training classes which on the whole, haven't made a great deal of difference. It has been useful in training me but she is easily distracted and training is more an exercise in gaining her attention.

DD, age 6, is getting better at understanding that she is not a dolly, and needs to alter her tone of voice when calling her etc so everything doesn't seem like a call to play.

It's just I have a niggling feeling I cannot shake and I'm becoming more nervous by the day.

There have been two occasions where she has nipped my daughter once on the hand and last week on the face. She escaped with a scratch on both occasions. Now, obviously her biting on any level is unacceptable. If she jumps or tries to nip we withdraw attention but instead of her catching on that the behaviour is undesired, she becomes irritated and starts barking to get attention. On the occasions she has nipped my daughter I can see exactly how it has happened. dd had a habit of following her and backing her into a corner and I think she felt threatened by this.

This morning however, was different. She was in the garden with me and ds walked across the garden. She laid low on the grass and as soon as he got close enough she jumped at him and bit his hand. Again, no skin broken but I just cannot have this and can only have her in the same room if she is on the house line. I do not have any of these issues when it is just the two of us together but that is not a realistic scenario, nor a common one.

I know in my heart I may have to reconsider her place here. I dedicate a a lot of time each day to her training, walks and playtime but I cannot envisage her ever being the kind of dog that will just happily mooch around whilst we all get on with what we are doing.

My priority is dcs safety and security and they are very upset that re-homing is something I am considering. Not to mention the fact how much we all love her and would miss his dearly if she was no longer here.

Your thoughts would be appreciated on this please?

You and the children need to understand how a dog thinks and learn to read the dogs body language. Once you understand what it thinks it going on you will be able to establish it's place in the pack - ie at the bottom, with the children above it. It is up to you as pack leader to teach that.

You need to do this soon otherwise the children do become at risk because the dog thinks they are below it in the pack. And because even play biting (which puppies do a lot to each other) can really hurt a child.

Can you try teaching the children how to react if the dogs face touches them - eg excessive loud yelp and withdraw from contact. Apparently that is how dogs react with over exuberant puppies and they learn to be more gentle.

If things don't get sorted soon then I think rehoming is your only option.

To be completely blunt - and I do not mean to offend you - I think that the pup has been put in situations with your dc that it shouldn't have been, and may now be fearful of the children. We all know how that could end up.

You need to ask yourself if you are willing to call in a behaviourist to help you sort the situation out (the advice that anyone can give without seeing the dog is very, very limited) and if you can make significant changes to the way the family treats the dog.

In the meantime, never leave your dc unsupervised with the pup.

Best of luck.

Hmm, at 6 mths she is still pretty young. Have you spoken to your vet? He/ she may be able to refer you to a decent behaviouralist. Training classes are all well and good but they cannot be all things to all dogs. Some dogs need a bit of extra understanding so their behaviour can be better managed.

I predict there will be a sea of answers- half will tell you you are mad for getting a dog in the first place, what were you thinking, dog must go, children's safety must come first etc etc. The second lot will slate you and trot out the old "there are no dogs, only bad owners" and blame you/ your children. If I'm honest, I am getting sick of both viewpoints on here

There IS a sensible middle ground. Dogs have personalities, just like people. There are no bad dogs, because dogs don't have a moral code. They don't really understand bad and good, but can understand cause and effect, so can have their behaviour managed accordingly. HOWEVER with some dogs it can be harder to manage/ control their behaviour than others. Sometimes it can take a lot of committment, time and money. You need to be honest with yourself as to whether you are capable of the committment behavioural therapy demands, or not. If on reflection you cannot meet these demands you are probably better to rehome the dog to people who can. This is NOT a relection on you- it is important to be honest about how much time/ commitment/ money you can spare, because there is no point in being half-hearted about it, it will only result in the dog being rehomed at a later stage when it may be harder.

Good luck whatever you decide

I think that the dog is behaving much like a 6 months old puppy, and if properly managed/handled, this wouldn't be a problem in a few months time.

The dog is misbehaving but so is your DD, your DD is old enough to know that dogs are not dollies, and should also respect the dog's space, cornering a scared dog is certainly something she has to learn not to do

However... I knew of a three year old killed by an over excited/playful 6 months old rottwailer, so, if you really can't trust them together you may need to consider not allowing them to play with each other for a while.

Excellent post Jooly

well you have all been a lot more gentle than I anticipated so thanks for that, I expected to be lambasted for having considered my options as opposed to just getting rid.

Took her for her evening walk a little while ago and dd came along. Fuck sake, I don't know who needs the training, her or the dog Even as we are walking she is telling the dog which way to walk, bending down to touch her and the dog is pulling like mad on the lead trying to catch up with her as she runs ahead. dd needs to be old every 2 minutes not to bother her, and not 2 keep giving commands not least because she doesn't even have her attention.

No one in this fucking house is listening to me. I have the dog on a house line tied around my waist as I type because dd is in the lounge and I cannot allow the dog to be anywhere I cannot monitor what either one is doing.

Sounds like my house! The only differences are that my DC are selectively deaf teenagers, my dogs older and better mannered than your pup and I'm less patient with my DC than you (all credit to you) so my children got taught a few rules from day one.

1. They are my dogs and I give the commands. A dog, if he hears 2 voices and 2 sets of commands, will ignore both... and no bugger ignores me!

1. If you get bitten, don't come running to me expecting me to tell the dog/s off, as it will probably be your fault.

It's very hard to establish what this 'biting' is without being there but ime your pup is acting like a pup does, plus possibly reacting to the actions of your DD, which he views as a threat and/or unacceptable. I'd say that there's nothing going on that can't be sorted by employing a reputable behaviouralist (as has been said, NOW, before problems get out of hand) and, to be honest, employing a harder line towards your daughter. (OK, you may not go as far as I did with my DC, but I'm 'the mad dog rescuer' so that's to be expected of me!).