Please help. Dog NOT happy about the baby and house (Long) move

[iloveteacakes]

I have a 5 yr old lurcher. DH and I rescued him 4 years ago. He had already been rehomed and returned once because he escaped and chased livestock. He had terrible separation anxiety (perhaps unsuprisingly) but with training and a pate-filled Kong we got to a point where he could be left happily and he was a pretty settled dog. Issues such as recall also improved with training so although he was still quite neurotic it was manageable and he seemed happy.

However, since dd was born 6 months ago he has gone downhill. Although we settled into a new routine with him after about fortnight he remains very unhappy. He follows me around during the day, takes no notice of dd other than to push past her to get to me, has tried to sit on her, roll on her etc. Although there is no aggression towards her he was pretty rough with a friend's baby who is crawling. When we are out he will frequently refuse to come back and I am now reluctant to let him off the lead as he is so unreliable. It is almost like he knows that when I have dd I am physically unable to fetch him back. He now does this with dh, too.

This has been bad enough but we moved house a month ago and since then he has almost totally regressed. If I go out he howls, and attacks the front door, the sofa and the carpet. He barks at noises ouside. He seems utterly miserable. We have tried the training and treats that were successful last time, and will continue to do so, but yesterday I returned to an untouched Kong. Am at my wit's end. It is just not realistic to stay in the house all day but we are going to get complaints from neighbours (or environmental health) at this rate and living like this is no fun for any of us.

Any advice? So far we have tried

• going in and out of the house repeatedly to try and desensitise him (this was what worked last time)
• Always leave a radio/light on plus pate-filled Kong and a couple of biscuits in various spots.
• Increased exercise (used to work a treat. Now he just seems even twitchier because so fit)
• Fairly regular routine
• Not leaving him for more than 3 hours (used to be able to leave him for 7-8 hours)
• Extra attention in the house so he doesn't feel so usurped.

Oops. Title should read 'Dog not happy about baby or house move (long).' House move was actually pretty quick.

Sounds liek he is a sensitive soul who has had a lot of changes in his life recently

I'd say this needs to be tackled from several angles, and that ideally you need to get a properly qualified behaviourist in to advise you. In the meantime:

• never leave baby and dog unsupervised. I'm not saying he's aggressive, but dogs can find babies very scary - especially when they atart crawling. What exactly happened with your friend's baby, and how much was he being supervised?

• get him a DAP (dog appeasing pheromone) collar to help take the edge off the stress for him.

• don't leave him for 3 hours. tbh am that you ever managed to leave a dog like this for 7-8 hours, but with his separation anxiety so bad now, every time you leave him you are reinforcing his anxiety and making the whole thing harder to cure.

Good luck.

Thank you for replying so quickly. Any suggestions about how to find a decent behaviourist or how much sessions cost? We talked to our vet when we first got him and she was not hugely useful. I will definitely look into the DAP thing. Anywhere you would recommend buying one from?

I wouldn't ever leave the dog and the baby together unsupervised. He doesn't always seem to know where his feet are, apart from anything else! It seemed like he got overexcited with my friend's baby and tried to paw or nose him. My friend and I were also on the floor at the time and so were able to make sure nothing happened. She has a dog, too, so wasn't freaked out by it. As I say, not aggressive, just rough.

Re leaving him- he really was pretty settled in the house before. We wouldn't regularly leave him for this long but when we did we would get home to find him lounging on his bed or the sofa. He definitely didn't seem bothered. I have talked to other people who have lurchers or greyhounds and they have similar experiences. I really don't know what to do about leaving him at the moment. It isn't possible for me to stay in the house all week as I have to take the baby to be weighed apart from anything else. We are going to do some more training now and tomorrow.

Look for an APBC member in your area here

Do be careful, there are many charlatans calling themselves behaviourists and who can do more harm than good. The APBC have quite stringent membership criteria though. The price will vary, but you can reasonably expect to pay about £80 for a full consulation (in your home), a written report and follow up calls. It may well be cheaper.

DAP collars are available from your vet or Pets at Home or Petplanet (website).

I know you can't stay in all the time, but do try not to leave him for long periods while he's like this. Ultimately what you will have to do is build up very, very slowly to leaving him for any length of time.

Have you ever used a crate for him?

I can understand why this is causing you anxiety but as a behaviourist this should not be a difficult case from what you have said.

Obviously a sensitive soul BUT and the big but is that you got him to overcome his issues before so you can certainly do it again probably quicker this time.

I can understand having a baby and the extra anxiety this is causing you but do as Bella suggest contact APBC who will be able to help.

DO not be disappointed that your vet could not help thier training does not cover a lot of behaviour and most would admit a behaviourist is the answer and will properly need to refer you in any case.

In the meantime I would dso as you are doing leave the room for a second and return with out acknowleding the dog as often as you can. If his behaviour is worse don't worry he is just desperately trying to train you. Don't let him. Just continue with it he will get it.

I wouldn't necessarily give him extra attention in the house. I would only give him attention if he done something to deserve it. eg you ask him to sit he gets a cuddle, don't just show him love if he is doing nothing as that can actually increase the anxiety. Ask him to go down and then cuddle him etc. If he comes to you and demands attention ignore him, not even a go away when he has gone away then call him to you for attention.
I wouldn't leave a dog for 7-8 hours either maybe some of the problem but the behaviourist on site will advise you better

We haven't tried a crate as I am pretty certain he would hate it. He stayed with a friend overnight (because we don't think he would handle boarding kennels) and when she shut him in a room he had all the paint off the door. I would be worried that he might have a wobbly and hurt himself by getting his claws caught on the sides.

We are going to contact the place we rescued him from as they have a behaviourist, and see if they can refer us. If not, the APBC seem to have a couple nearby.

Re the 7-8 hours- this really was not on a regular thing, just that on the odd occasion it happened he was unruffled. His separation anxiety really seemed to have gone. I don't expect him to manage that on a regular basis and would normally leave him with someone he knows!

The training this afternoon has not gone well and he howled as soon as the front door was shut, which is heartbreaking to hear. But we will persist and get professional advice and fingers crossed things will get better. Thank you for the advice. I am going to look through it again once dd is in bed.

This may sound utterly barking (arf arf) but have you seen the Dog Whisperer? If you youtube him he's on there. From watching far too many episodes, I would suggest that if the dog is trying to sit on the baby, the dog think's he's above the baby in the pecking order. You need to reassert your's and the BABY's dominance and ensure that the dog feels secure in the knowledge that he's at the bottom of the pack. Once the dog is settled there, he'll calm down again.

Sorry to contradict but please please please do not use the dog whispers methods.. They are old fashioned, sometimes cruel and can do more harm than good.

Dominance theory has been dismissed as out of date and not relevant in dog training today.

I would second trying a crate. I have two whippets, my older dog had seperation anxiety when she was younger, she too would eat paint off doors, chew through arcitrave etc if shut in anywhere but she LOVED her crate.

I currently have a large dog crate for both mine to share, it has two layers of vet bed, a padded dog bed, a pillow and a large cushion in it so is super whippet comfy . They both adore it and spend hours in there. If you put a blanket over the crate, it becomes quite cave like which a lot of dogs love as it appeals to their instincts.

Both mine are shut in it overnight as my younger dog has recently gone through a rather unpleasant "forgotten about housetraining" phase and it has worked a treat!

I'm afraid I don't have any other suggestions other than talking to an expert and keeping on trying what worked before. Good luck though.

I felt like I just wanted to add that Victoria Stilwell from 'It's me or the Dog' is very good, I agree that Ceasar Milan can be a bit of a 'bully' although his techniques work, I can see me using Victoria's methods a lot more

Also, I also have a 3 yr old staffie cross whippet so full of energy and VERY friendly and even tho I am worried when baby arrives, he knows boundaries and learns quickly, we'll never allow him in the nursery and always keep him and baby within a distance of each other so he starts to learn he is below the baby