Any advice on getting a dog for family with young children

[wassername]

I'm really at the very beginning of wondering if we could give the time and commitment needed to own a dog. I know the kids would love to have one, but I don't know where to start investigating the subject. I don't know what breeds are best with young kids (3,6,and 9 at the moment) and as we live in London in a terraced house I wouldn't want a large breed or one that needs really long walks as we could really only do round the park on weekdays. Any advice would be welcome.

Get a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Really soppy, don't need training, cute, affectionate, not much bothered how much exercise they get. I haven't got one, by the way, but have a Golden Retriever who is lovely but very boisterous, and it doesn't sound like you're up for that kind of thing. Or MmeLindt will be on in a mo to say you should get a bichon maltese

Rehoming an adult from a family is a good idea if you are not really interested in the enormous, massive, messy, smelly hassle that is the first few months (years maybe?) with a puppy.

Have a look at the breed profiles on www.petplanet.co.uk and remember that most breeders recommend waiting until your youngest child is 5.

Lol @ MmeLintd and her maltese. I have a Bichon Frise which is very similar to a Maltese.

She is very sweet and never given us a bit of bother. Has taken lots of abuse from the dc but has never as much as growled at them.

Oh and she is very very cute!!!

I've got a 4 month old puppy and my kids are nearly 3 and nearly 5.

It's been great, we all love him and even DH has been won over but I won't lie - it has been bloody hard work. Dd has been fab with him and remarkably sensible for a 4 year old but ds is remarkably unsensible and needs continual very close supervision when he's around the pup.

I'm no expert but I'm not convinced that the breed itself is important but, if you're going for a puppy, to be very careful who you buy from and ideally meet both parents. We went for a breed generally not recommended for small kids (jack russell) but the breeder was recommended to us and he made it clear that he wouldn't sell us a pup inless he felt one seemed suitable temperment-wise for us. We also met the pup's mum and dad who were both very friendly and good with our kids.

I'm at home most of the time - I work one day a week and a puppy walker comes in twice that day. You'd need to work out in advance how often you're likely to be out of the house and for how long, whether you're going to use the garden as toilet area, how you'll feel about accidents inside (we've got wooden floors thank goodness!). Are your kids going to be happy going on daily walks come rain, sleet or shine?

we've got labradors, but they won't suit your circumstances

Labs are the best but agree probably not suitable for your circumstances.

Cavalier King Charles Spaniel?

If you're not entirely sure about getting a dog, I would hold off for a while. Once you've got the dog, it's too late to change your mind and you can be left wondering what on earth you were thinking bringing this monster puppy into your home! Why don't you commit to taking a walk to the park at the same time each day (come rain or shine!) for two weeks - not only to see if it is practical time-wise, but also that you are really willing to do it. If after a few days (or in the rain) you can't bring yourself to do it, chances are it wouldn't be any different when the dog comes along. I advised someone else to do this once, but she didn't listen. She told me "it'll be different when I have a dog, because I'll want to go out and walk". A few years later she has a very fat, unhappy dog who never sets foot over the garden gate. If you'll walk in the rain without a dog for company, you'll certainly do it with a dog!

With regards to breed, in my opinion a lab is the best family dog there is, but this obviously wouldn't suit! Neither would most sorts of terrier, as they need a lot of exercise (except perhaps westies - all the ones I've ever known have been very lazy!). A king charles would be a good choice size-wise and they are known for their good natures, especially around children, but (as with all dogs) you need to go to a reputable breeder to guard against health problems. Miniature yorkshire terriers are also great little dogs, not snappy like people often believe, and are equally happy to go for a walk or lie on the sofa. My first dog was a mini yorkie, and lived for 16 years. He died curled up asleep on my knee one night, and he was a happy little thing right up to the end, everyone loved him

think carefully about how experienced you are with dgs - a reasonable amount of sense (stairgates to keep separate, not leaving them together alone) can make managing with small kids and dogs relatively easy.

a good breeder should offer over and above the minimum of seeing puppies & bitch together -

a contract with a return clause
after-sales support
they should be be interested in making you prove you can offer their puppy a good home.

a good breeder will look at the litter and pick one that is calmer than most for your family....

or consider a rescue - whippet/ greyhound are lovely dogs, once round the park will be fine for them, and they love their sleep.

there is merit in rehoming an adult dog - then you don't have the puppy period to contnd with whilst your own kids are so small!

Sorry to hijack... but to expand on this, would a breeder let you meet the parents (dogs) prior to having puppies... The thinking is we see the parents temperament and not get taken away with the cuteness of the puppies. We are considering getting a puppy (still thinking) at the moment we are leaning towards a cocker spaniel.

both parents wil be a tough call - breeders often breed to dogs from far afield, even out of country -

but the bitch should be with the litter...some breeders like their bitches opinion of you - people smelling of scared dogs will rarely be liked by the proud mother of the litter.

we have a cocker spaniel and she is brilliant with kids. i would also suggest waiting a bit as they are hard work as puppies. plus i wouldn't trust a 3 year old to behave properly with a puppy unless supervised the whole time

Agree Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. They were recommended by a vet friend as a good option. See mine on my profile and fall in love! He's fantastic with DS1, who is 2.8, DS2 who is 10 weeks and my two nieces, 6 and 1. Very gentle and tolerant, as well as darn cute!

I wasn't goint to post on here as it always sounds as if I am being negative but read the post about OH wanting to rehome our puppy.

It is hard work and puppies require an awful lot of time and commitment every day for over 14 years. Do think long and hard about it as it is heartbreaking when it doesn't work out and the dog through no fault of its own has to be rehomed.

I don't know your situation but I guess city dogs are harder work than rural dogs as ther is less places to let them have a good run and tire then out. I am not against children and dogs I have 5 DC and 5 dogs but dogs are my passion and I love getting up at 6.00 on the weekend to walk the dogs before DC wake up and I love dragging the grump DC out for a walk every weekend even if it is raining! But it is not for everyone!!!!!

I do agree with minimu I have to say.

Dogs need walking. ALL dogs and I personally believe that most dogs ideally need two hours plus a day, for mental stimulation if not for exercise. They can and do cope with less, but I don't believe they thrive on less and a lot of the problems people have with their dogs is due to not enough exercise.

I have sold a puppy to someone with young children once. We took her back at six months old as her owners couldn't keep her and she was totally out of control. It was clear by the things she came back with that she was very loved, but I suspect they found it much harder work than they had anticipated and struggled, despite having attended training classes. I would personally think very, very carefully before homing to a family with pre school age children again.

Puppies are much harder work than children for most people and also, despite people having a romatic idea of puppy and chil dgrowing up together, puppies and children really aren't the best mix. Puppies are exciteable and jump up and nip, children scream when they do this, which in turn makes the puppy worse and it can become a nightmare unless you train your child as much as the puppy...

That said, I do have dogs and children and I despite being pregnant we are planning a litter shortly and I will keep a puppy from that, so it can be done. However, I prefer dogs to most people and rehoming wouldn't be an option for me whatever my circumstances. I would no more likely rehome a dog than my child.

Would you maybe consider an older, less active dog that was used to children? That way, not only would you have fewer years of commitment with your first dog (dogs aren't for evryone) but the dog would be already trained and 'ready made' if you like. I think it would depend on how well your children could behave around a dog too, but dogs like this do come into rescue and might suit you better.

didn't see that you were in london. don't think a spaniel would be suitable there as they need too much exercise. so please ignore my previous thread. still think it would be better to get one once your children are a little older

My children were roughly the same age as yours when I got my lab almost a year ago and it is very hard work - although it also brilliant and my dc's love him to bits!

It is a pita when the dog needs walked but its pouring and your toddler is mid-tantrum so its not all cute puppy moments.

When you first get them, they really need 1-2-1 just about constantly and for you to be able to enjoy being a dog owner you need to have them properly trained. Are you experienced enough to do this yourself or do you have time to fit in puppy training in the evenings?

It is also pretty expensive. You need to factor in innoculations, wormers, flea tablets, food, vet trips.

Are your children confident around dogs? Ours knocks the children over accidently when he's haring around, as a puppy he would jump up and snatch their toys from their hands and they do tend to nip when they're teething - you need to make sure your dc's could cope with this.

That said, although it is hard work we love having a dog (although we waited for years to get another when our last one passed away as I was always pregnant or had a baby in a pram which I didnt think would be an ideal time ). Having a pet is a good way to teach your children responsibility and he will become their best friend.

Petplanet.co.uk has a breed profile which will show you which ones are advisable for your circumstances.

This is all a bit negative isn't it? I do sometimes wonder why I had to complicate my life with this fluffball who's nearly as much work as a baby, and also bites all the time, chews furniture, leaps up and knocks the dcs over etc.

But... there's also something so mood-lifting about the puppy's sheer delight when he sees his family, he's really cute, and the dcs love him despite the fact he nicks their breakfast and bites holes in their pjs.

If you do decide to get a puppy - be very sure to go for an easy-to-train sort. Walking is the easiest part imo. After all going out for a walk is quite nice and uncomplicated. I reckon neglecting training must be much more common, and it's not just a question of classes, you really have to do it all the time. My goldie is quite quick on the uptake, and just desperate to do whatever makes me happy. I'd be tearing my hair out now if he was stubborn or difficult on top of all his puppy wildness.

Oh yes, forgot to mention that ds2 kicks our dog all the time and ds3 pulls his tail all the time. (I am, of course, working on it.) What Midori says about puppies and children not being a match made in heaven is worth thinking about.

Puppies and toddlers are a match made in hell. I speak from experience.

If I was you I'd rehome an adult dog. I have no experience of owning Cavalier King Charles Spaniels, but they were very popular on the site we camped at this year. I noticed the dogs more this year than I would have normally, because I was told by my dog sitter (DH) that my pup had been killed in an accident, just hours after we arrived . Being that dogs were on the forefront of mind the whole week, I paid a lot of attention to the three Cavalier King Charles that were there, and they were amazing.

I almost bought one myself. So calm, obdient and great with my dds. Dd2 was only 2 at the time, we couldn't keep her away from them.

Adul Staffies are also great with kids. One of the only breeds reccomended by the Kennel Club to be around young children.

But as already pointed out, dogs are hard work. Are you prepared for regular walks in the rain/snow/hail/wind/cold as well as the lovely summer walks? The hair all over your sofa? The training classes? The expense (insurance, food, fleaing, worming, neutering, training - it all adds up)?, accidents i.e. waking up to piss soaked floor?

And about the wee'ing and poo'ing everywhere, you have got to be prepared for the fact that when they are elderly, it might start all over again and there is not a damn thing you can do about it. My fathers Akita is getting on now and his bowels aren't what they used to be. My mum wakes up to a lovely, pile of shit that needs cleaning before she can make her coffee.

If you are willing to put up with all the above, go for it. To most people they are well worth the hassle.

I am having no end of troubles with my own rehomed tearaway (I didn't go to a proper rescue - my dog wasn't vetted or trained), but I wouldn't swap him for the world.

cocker Spaniel like my beautiful boy.
he is bouncy and a bit stupid but he adores attention, ALL attention.
he does seem to have endless amounts of energy but he doesnt need massive amounts of walking so long as what he gets is regular.

He really is my DDs best friend. they adore each other. He will even sneak upstairs to sleep under her bed (i dont let him upstairs so as to minimise the muddy prints on carpet)

He is the perfect size as he is small enough to not take up much room but not so small i trip over him.

He is loyal and loving and was very easily trained and has always been very well behaved.

puppies are a huge commitment though. i would look at local rescue sites. there is a cocker spaniel rescue organisation.

Yes, old age (of the dog) worries me a bit. We had, well mum & dad really had, a good couple of years of wondering whether our old lab should be pts. They eventually did it when he was 18, can't remember what the trigger was, but he was already good as blind, deaf and near immobile in his back legs, and had no bowel control. It was sad and a relief really in the end, but the last couple of years were very wearing.

mamazon

i have a girl and agree with all you say. they are gorgeous and great with kids. i can't imagine living with her in london though- she adores racing round chasing things and running through bushes - i think she would find london very restricting

We got a Minature Schnauzer last Spring when DSs were just 2 and 5.

It was very hard work for the first three months and espcially until our dog was toilet trained. He used to jump at the children and scratched my 2yo with his claws on a number of occasions, nipped when playing with them, chew anything/everything including me most of the time, eat any toy left on the floor and generally needed CONSTANT supervision. From around 5 months he calmed down alot and now he is nearly 1 and alot calmer and easier. He's still chewing things, barks alot in the garden which is very annoying but most of the other things have stopped.

This is all negative, but on the positive side, we all adore him. DSs both say they love him, cried when he got stuck in a door, talk about him with their friends and like to hold his lead (when safe) on walks. He is amazing with children, DS2 especially is VERY boisterous with him and he has never so much as growled at him.

Minature Schnauzers are IMO great family dogs. Brilliant with children, need about 1 hour walk a day, friendly dogs, don;t need loads of space. However, they are pretty excitable (or is that just mine??!?) and can be yappy.

We all got more fresh air and are alot more outdoorsy. DSs are not scared of animals and when he is not being a pain he is good to have around.

I am really glad we got our dog and wouldn't ever consider not having him. I'd think seriously about all the negative stuff, but if you can put up with this until they have got through the small puppy stage I would go for it.

We got a Staffie pup two weeks ago, my little ones are 5 and 16 months.

My 16 month old Ds has totaly taken to the pup despite her nipping him and jumping at him on occasion! He sort of just walks through her IYKWIM!

My 5 year old Dd is more nervous of the liveliness! I am trying to train the children as much as the pup, they need to be in charge of her too, able to take a biscuit away from her or a toy she may be chewing etc.

I am finding it quite hard work, but the pup has a crate in the kitchen and we have a stairgate on the door, so kids and dog can be seperated at times!

Its so much fun!

OI!

I was actually just about to recommend a Maltese

Will read the rest of the thread now.

Ok, I do agree that puppies are hard work but for me it was worth it, knowing that the history of the dog, and that she had no nasty experiences.

I do not agree that all dogs need at least two hours walking a day. Daphne does fine on an hour and if it is raining will nip outside, squat under the bench and do her wee there. She does not like rain.

We tend to do about an hour a day, more at weekends.

I discovered this website recently and their description of a Maltese/Cavalier King Charles is a perfect description of Daphne, especially the lying around part. She is currently lying in the sun just outside the door like a small fluffy doormat.

You do have to be committed to a dog. It is a big decision to make.