Thinking of getting a puppy but I have concerns

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I'm normally a cat person but DP has been harping on about getting a dog for the past year or so now and i am finally warming to the idea. He's never had a dog before, but as a teenager, the family had two dogs - one dalmation who sadly died of distemper and the other was a beautiful Great Dane who lived a good long life for the breed but ended up with a tumour in his nether regions and died that way (IIRC).

Anyway, my main concern is the fact that the puppy would have to be alone for two days a week on the days that i work and i am not so sure this would be fair on the dog. DP doesn't seem to think it would be a problem but i have told him that leaving a dog on it's own for at least 8 hours during the day without being able to go to the loo would be cruel and unfair. Having said that, my DS is out of work (again) at the moment so would be around to let the dog out, but i'm pretty sure he wouldn't clear up any "accidents" and wouldn't be very keen to keep a vigilant eye out to make sure the dog doesn't mess indoors!

I always told DP that i wouldn't entertain a dog until i wasn't working anymore, but at the moment that's not financially possible.

I'm also worried about the house getting destroyed when i'm out of the house - when our Great Dane was a puppy he actually chewed up/destroyed the hall/stair carpet!! The Dalmation used to eat/chew socks, shoes etc (which i think is more normal lol).

Obviously people who work do have dogs so what i want to know is how do you get round leaving them on their own for so long (if you do at all!).

We are looking at a black lab or similar.

Any advice would be fab - thank you!

I guess a lot of annual leave when you first get the puppy to settle them in and train them, then a dog walker would be a reasonable, if costly, solution.

I thought about a dog walker too. I'm assuming they'd have to come twice a day? Or would it be more?? I suppose it depends on the dog's toilet habits......

If you're worried about damage, I wouldnt recommend a lab. They are notorious chewers and mine has cost us a fortune in damaged remote controls, toys, shoes, etc. He's a year old now and although he's better than he was we still have to make sure everything is put well outwith his reach.

They need loads of exercise as well and I'm not sure they would happy being inside all day 2 days a week which could lead to behavioural problems. Although as has been pointed out a dog walker is a good solution.

If you're not sure about getting a dog in the first place, a lab might not be the way to go - they're pretty high maintenance. Although wonderful family dogs who are very loyal and tolerant of children and easy to train.

Have you looked in to "lazier" breeds.

I don't think I would get a puppy if I was away 2 days a week - sorry

When we got our last puppy (our 2nd dog), I was at university 1 day a week. I felt terrible about that, but we had settled him in for about 6 weeks, we got a dog walker in who took them both out for about 2 hours in the day, and also he had another dog to keep him company.

I agree with a dog walker if they could be out for a good portion of the day - or could you get a sitting service?

Are you able to go home at lunch?

I have a labrador puppy 13 weeks and I would not recommend them to anyone who is worried about damage to the house he has destroyed a lot in my house.

I would maybe get a rescue labrador who is hopefully less destructive.

What about a rescue Greyhound? lovely lazier breed dogs,happy to nap and have a couple of half hour walks a day(or longer if you fancy) lots of them near me,wish i had got one.Much as i adore our 11wk old Lab, he is very hard work and chews anything he can get hold of if not watched every minute.

I agree with SB6699. My dog has a lot of lab in her and she does like to chew. She's nearly 7 months and been here for 3 months. The bottom stair carpet is gone , 2 of DD's books, one library book, hair clips, some of DS's toys . And when she couldn't go out for a few days with Kennel cough she started eating the plaster.Plus a number of plants and plant pots . Oh and the bottom of my stool. Plus any thing else I've blanked out. Plus she will be going through another lot of teething soon. My house looks a lot better than my friend's house where she is minus the end of her worktop and her kitchen cupboards are chewed.

She has to be crated if we go out or she starts pulling the sofa cushions off the sofa. We both work from home and I has assumed she would sit with DH in his office but she's having none of it. I work for an hour or two upstairs and she barks when I'm there as she hates it if she's not near me. She's currently asleep on a blanket on our bedroom floor as we've just relented and let her upstairs for the first time, desperate for a lie in.

Dog training has taken over my life, I carry treats in my trouser and dressing gown pockets. I'm constantly telling the DC's to move things so the dog won't eat it, not to play on the floor with her. She jumps up a lot despite constant efforts to stop her, though slowly improving.

When out walking her I'm constantly on the lookout for people, horses, cyclists and joggers so I can call her back and ensure she won't chase them. That's as well as calling her back and rewarding then releasing, plus calling back to put on the lead so she doesn't associate the lead with the end of the walk.

I wouldn't swap her but she is much harder work than the DC's were. Everyone who knows about dogs tell me that she is very good for her age end will be fabulous at 18/24 months. As she came to us at 4 months we didn't get toilet issues plus she is very good about not mouthing.

I'm not having a puppy again. People tell you they are hard work but you really can't imagine the reality. A friend has golden retriever the same age and agrees. I sound negative about my dog but love her to bits. If younare going to do it it has to be beacause you want a dog not because DH plus children want one as the reality is(as in the case of my friend who caved to pressure) that it will be you out clearing poo, cutting trips short to get back to the dog, clearing up mess, walking in all weathers.

I'd say absolutely not - you are right: it would be cruel and actually illegal to leave a puppy for 2 days a week. Look at the RSPCA's website and, in particular the requirements of the relatively new Animal Welfare Act. None of the major rescue and welfare organisations would give you a puppy with your circumstances.

It may be possible to have an older dog if you employ a dog walker but this will add to the cost of keeping the dog which, even without unforeseen accidents or illnesses is quite considerable. I reckon a lab sized dog costs at least £45 a month just for food, wormers, flea treatment and insurance.
Dogs left alone often develop separation anxiety - a form of stress - and chewing releases endorphins to counteract this, so they chew anything. Walls, floors, skirting boards... I know someone who leaves 2 dogs alone - they have each other for company, a dog walker and toys, but they have tunnelled through his kitchen floor
People think if you're around for a few weeks to 'settle the puppy in' then that helps - it often does the opposite. How is a puppy to understand that everyone was here for 3 weeks but now they've all gone back to work/school etc?
Absolutely not - please don't get a puppy. More dogs are euthanised due to behavioural problems than illness or injury, and a major source of behavioural problems is being left alone. They are social creatures.

We have a Maltese Terrier/Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, a dog like her would be a much better option for you in terms of destruction of the house and general laziness.

She is happy with just one walk a day, and can be left for 5 or 6 hours. 8 hours is pushing it though.

She has chewed a couple of the DC's playmobile (which I am fine about as I hate them) and an old Barbie of DD's. Not much apart from that, certainly no flooring or cupboards.

You would have to spend a bit of time with her in the first weeks though, I gradually increased her time alone until I could leave her for a couple of hours. She is very sociable and just loves to be with us.

Very true even if you got an adult dog,you really cant leave them for more than 4hrs at a time and then only after a good walk.So you would need a dog walker or to come home during the day.
My Chis are great about being left for longer,but there are 2 of them and they are lazy and i try not to do it too often as its not fair and boring for them.
Of course now we have our Lab monster we cant go anywhere for longer than 2hrs as he is too young to leave.I also think that when you have a pup you have to commit to being around all the time for several months not just weeks as they really need that time to learn whats expected of them...you reap what you sow with dogs.

Definately do not get a puppy if you are out 2 days a week.

Despite the cruelty angle you will not be able to housetrain, socialise your puppy.

If you have loads of money you could employ a dog walker to STAY with the puppy for those two days but again not ideal and would cost a fortune.

When you have a puppy you have to consider yourself on maternity leave for at least 6 weeks and dedicate this time solely to the pups basic training. Even after this period of time you will still not be able to leave the puppy for a long time.

I spend my working days sorting out issues that have arisen due to puppies not being socialised properly, or basic puppy training being handled incorrectly. Please don't do it!

Don't give labradors a bad name for chewing, it can always be prevented. Usually activity from a bored or stressed dog.

As a breeder, I wouldn't even consider homing a pup to someone who works two full days a week. Most decent breeders feel the same way.

Puppies need housetraining, and it is not easy to do this at the best of times, let alone when you have ot leave it. You will also almost certainly get problems with seperation anxiety and chewing. The only way to avoid chewing is to crate the puppy, and to crate any dog for such long periods of time is cruel, imo.

A dog walker wouldn't help, as puppies shouldn't be walked for long periods. A dog sitter is a possible solution, if you have a family member who could look after the puppy on the days you work? It would still probably be best to take a lengthy period of time off work when the puppy first arrives (a month?) so puppy can settle in first.

The best soluton is proably an older rescue dog that is used to being left alone for periods of time. You would still need a dog walker at lunchtime or to be able to come home and walk the dog yourself though.

Not much more I can add to what Bella has already said except that if your DH is unlikely to be vigilant to a pup needing to be taken out into the garden regularly to toilet then you will have hell on earth trying to establish and maintain a toilet training routine. All your hard work will be pointless if for two days a week the routine is thrown out of the window. It would be unkind to take on a dog under your current circumstances and neither you nor he would be at all happy, for all the reasons already given.

Sorry to be such a misery and I don't mean to offend, but thats the way it is, and as has been said, no reputable rescue or breeder would consider homing to people in your situation, no matter how well-meaning you are, with good reason.

I'm very strongly with those who have said it would be cruel and very selfish to get a puppy and leave it alone for 8 hours a day, 2 days a week. Dogs are highly intelligent and social creatures; solitude is very damaging to them. Don't do it.

And also second minimu - please don't tar all labs with the same brush. My three have never chewed anything they shouldn't; they haven't ever been bored enough to consider it.

don't do it. it simply isn't fair to leave a puppy home alone for eight hours a day, even if it's only two days a week.

And a dog walker would set you back in the region of £10 an hour - can yu afford that?

I don't think that admitting to the destructive capabilities of labradors is giving them a bad name. Of course not all labradors are destructive, but many are, and the fact is that the destruction a labrador can cause can be immense.

And let's face it - a labrador left on its own for eight hours a day is likely to chew.

Dogs are sociable creatures and not designed to stay home alone for hours at a time.

Thank you so much everyone for your constructive comments. I have taken it all on board and have read the replies to DP, who is still unconvinced.

I think a rescue dog would be a better solution, with a dog walker coming at lunchtime. As i commute, it's not possible for me to come home at lunchtime to walk the dog. The only thing that puts me off rescue dogs is that you dont fully know their background or what they've been through. I'm a bit worried that they might just turn on one of us or God Forbid, DD, when i'm out of the room etc, IYKWIM. I'm probably being uber paranoid tho lol.

Having had two dogs (albeit years ago) i do know that they can be a real hassle, especially when they are young, but as they were my parents' dogs, i didn't really have to deal with the full brunt of "puppy reality".

Will do further research.........

RG a reputable rescue will take your circumstances and experience into account. Therefore they wouldn't offer anyone a dog which hadn't been assessed and most likely in your case would suggest one which also has a history - ie which came from a home and wasn't a former pound stray or similar.

Sadly ime many owners who take their dogs to rescue will lie and its only when he gets there that the rescue will know the real reasons for their desire to rehome him. Hence the assessments and re-training as necessary, which would be carried out by a decent rescue. However this is by no means always the case and many smaller, independent rescues may know the previous owners, who are often locals, and the owners reasons for rehoming and thus can be assured that these reasons are genuine.

If you feel a rescue dog is for you, research the rescue well, and let them guide you. A good one will homecheck you, match you with the right dog, offer lifetime support and insist that the dog returns to them if ever you couldn't keep him. In short, they will work for the dog, not the owner, the prospective owner or themselves.

Quite simply, avoid those who don't. Some people are experienced enough and have time enough to take daft risks as I have and are able to take on less easy ex pound dogs, but this would not be a sensible option for you - you'd need to find a rescue which offers all the things I've stated.... and only then if you are willing and able to invest in a dog walker/sitter.

If you'd care to give the area or county you live in I may be able to suggest a rescue or two which might be able to help and advise you (I'm involved in rescue). Equally some independent rescues will rehome further afield if they can arrange homechecks and you are willing to travel to them to meet them in the first instance.

Not all rescues are problem dogs, a high number are actually just family pets people can't be bothered with anymore. (disgusting, but it happens)

A good rescue will match a dog to your circumstances, and they are usually extra careful if you have children, especially young ones.

One thing, it is a bad idea to leave a child alone unattended with any dog, even if ti is just for second. Children are inclined to do things that may provoke a reaction (possibly from pain) in even the best natured and well socilaised dog, and it's not fair to the dog or child to leave them in that situation.

Can't say it better than Valhalla and Midori really - I fear I may be becoming redundant on here

My most reliable, most trustworthy dog is a rescue who was abused. In many ways rescues are a much safer bet than a pup - if you go to a reputable rescue you'll get a fully assessed dog whose character is a known quantity. The past experiences which shaped that character are irrelevant - what matters is knowing what type of adult dog the puppy has turned into.

And absolutely never leave small dc unattended with any dog - dc can do things to dogs which provoke a bite (or even just a warning from the dog) and the poor dog is then on a slippery slope to rehoming at best and euthanasia af worst.

If your DH is at home now, then it is a good time to get a puppy.

When we got our puppy, we had a nanny at home so the dog got let out when she needed to. Now, there is no one at home in the day, and the dog just seems to sleep. I don't think she has much concept of time.

A lot of people keep their puppies in crates when they are out, and that seems to help with soiling and confines any chewing to dog toys.

Vallhala - i'm in Kent and only know (off the top of my head) the RSPCA centre in Leybourne.

DP isn't around at the moment - he's only at home from work because of the Xmas hols. It's DS (19.5) who is out of work again at the moment and wouldn't keep a vigilant eye out for toilet signals and would most likely leave any mess for me to clear up and pretend it happened while he was out! He would most likely do his usual thing of getting up at midday and buggering off out with his mates all day.

RG, my first thought is Foal Farm in Kent; www.foalfarm.org.uk/about_us/mission_statement

There's also Pro Dogs Direct in SE London which also have a Kent branch I believe (Gladys in London is one of my contacts, a lovely lady). Pro Dogs - Direct Re-Homing 01732 872222 01732 848499

Don't know this one personally but they're also Kent based: www.rain.org.uk/HomesNeeded.aspx

Further afield and breed-specific is Vigil German Shepherd Rescue in Surrey (I have to give them a vote of approval, they're super and I can't recommend GSDs highly enough!).

Also Animal Samaritans - www.animalsamaritans.org.uk/homes.htm

If you have a particular breed in mind I may be able to give you an idea of specific rescues including those which aren't local to you but which will rehome outside of their own area.

Good luck, hope this helps.

Thanx Vallhala. Thankfully, DP's research into getting a puppy and him asking around has lead him to scrap the idea (for now, anyway!). I'm somewhat relieved, I have to say. When i'm not working (hopefully in the next couple of years) I'll be more than happy to reconsider getting a dog.

Thank you so much for everyone's advice - i read all the posts out to DP, so it has obviously made him see sense!!

Thanx again everyone!

If you can hire a dog walker, I'd say an adult dog would be fine, but preferably not a very active breed like a lab, unless you go for an older one. Young labs are very energetic.

if it's routine was something like
morning, 20 min walk. lunchtime, 1 hr walk and evening 1 hr walk, then that should be enough for the average dog, unless you get something very intelligent like a collie who also needs extra mental stimulation, but then all dogs do, usually weekend trips out for a walk somewhere different is useful.