Puppy up at night for cuddles

[Madsometimes]

I know we are doing everything wrong, so please put me on the right tracks.

We got our cocker cross puppy last Saturday and getting him to sleep is proving to be a real toughie. He has a travel box which we are using as his crate. He goes into the crate during the day for naps, and sleeps in it at night. The crate is in our kitchen which is gated. He goes crazy if we close the crate door, but the kitchen gate is locked (which he hates).

During the day he loves taking himself off for naps, but at night he hates sleeping on his own. In fact he is usually totally shattered in the day time, because of his night time antics.

He also follows us around constantly, and when we sit down in the evening he begs for a lap. If we refuse to let him up for a cuddle he curls around our feet to sleep.

We are paper training him, and he has a puppy pad in the kitchen for wees. He tends to have a separate place for poos, which is in the next room. Therefore when he cries at night, we do go to him to see if he needs a poo. He is not perfect with wees and poos but has never soiled his crate.

Last night, he went to bed at 11:30 pm and got up at 2 am. Then he had a mad half hour of playing which he followed up with a poo at 2:30. By 3 am he was still crying when I left the kitchen, so dh came down and said we should leave him cry. He cried from 3 to 4 am and then fell asleep but woke up again just before 6.

Every night since Saturday I have had about 4 hours sleep, and I am starting to feel very grumpy. Added to this, he is the puppy which is not good with his puppy food, so I think that he is hungry. However, last night he did eat well, so maybe food has nothing to do with it.

Dh thinks we should go cold turkey with the crying and let him howl all night if that is what it takes. I'm not so sure, because of the neighbours and the children. Also, if he howls for hours, then maybe he will have another wee or poo to do! He is 9 weeks.

Please don't flame me, I am feeling rather sleep deprived!

We've given our puppy a ticking clock for his crate. He cuddles up next to it and has only woken once which was on the first night we got him. Otherwise he's slept til 7am every morning. He gets his last feed at about 7pm and usually does a poo some time in the evening. Water is taken away at about 10.30pm and he can then last til morning without needing to wee/poo. Maybe it's just beginner's luck though?!

Oh dear, he has been napping all day long. Every time I try to wake him, he plays for 5 minutes and then collapses in a heap whereever he can. I think I am in for another bad night. At least the dc will be back from school soon. He will not get too much peace then.

Puppies are not much different to babies really. They need to learn what is right and wrong - and they need all good behaviour reinforced with encouragement and love. Am I correct in thinking you've only had him for 4 days?

They are really, really hard work.

It's clear your puppy isn't frightened by his crate, nor confused by what should happen in it (because he happily takes himself off there for naps in the day). His time clock does sound as though it's up the creek. Do you have a routine of things he does during the day?

All the pups I've had follow the same routine - a wee and poo outside as soon as they get up, followed by breakfast and a play, then a snooze. Then a very short walk, then a snooze, then a play followed by another snooze, and then lunch.

The afternoon follows a very similar pattern, and we always throw in 2 very short (3-4 minutes) basic training sessions.

Just before bed-time, they have a wee and play outside, then a cuddle followed by a biscuit and bed.

When they're as little as yours, I set the alarm and take them outside every 2/3 hours all night so they don't have to cry (no games at all though - just a wee, lots of praise and back to bed).

Is he warm enough at night? Tiny puppies can need extra warmth at night.

Consistency is the key to settling a pup I think - offer the same food, at the same time - praise good behaviour and ignore bad. Shouting at pups just confuses them.

Also, I can't leave a puppy crying. I don't think that leaving him to cry it out can possibly help. I don't respond immediately to crying, but will go down the instant there's a break in the noise to soothe the pup back to sleep (pup in crate, me lying on floor getting cold but doing a lot of calm stroking!)

I have a 9 week old cocker cross puppy too! (His mum is a springer, dad a cocker)
I've had him for 10 days now and after 3 really bad nights sleep, he has settled into our family really well.

I did want him sleeping downstairs (bedrooms are upstairs) but decided it was more important that we all got some sleep. So, we now allow him to sleep in our bedroom on his own bed. He sleeps like a baby all night and wees (9 out of 10 times) on his puppy pad.

We are out most days working, but the puppy is fab. He has the run of most of the house while we are out. I had to puppy proof the house beforehand but now I think its safe for him. It means everything had to be moved up a level, just like when a baby starts to crawl!

how long is he happy to be left on his own for kid?

Why can't he sit on y our lap for a cuddle? He is only a baby.

We are out from 8 till 4. I was off sick for the first few days so he wasn't just left in an unfamiliar place.
When I go out, I leave the radio on. The first couple of days he howled when we left him. But after that, he stopped. I know he has stopped because I drop the kids to school in the car then bring the car home before going to work. I don't come back into the house as I don't want to disturb him.

Its not ideal, but thats our routine and he needs to fit in with us. The breeder was out all day and he was kept in a cage and let out at night. I guess he is kind of used to it.
He is really happy to see us all when we get in, and we are really happy to see him too!

i think that's v hard on a tiny puppy i have to say. how is he learning to be housetrained / socialised if he's alone all day?

I know its not ideal for him, I really wish I could stay with him. But, I have to go to work. His breeders were also out all day, he had already been separated from his mum before we got him so, he had been exposed to being alone all day.

I only work term time, still a lot of time away from home I know, but I have blocks of time at home and DH often has a day off in the week so it varies slightly week to week. (On average, he is alone for 4 out of 7 days)

He was already weeing on paper when we got him and we have continued with this. He goes out frequently in the garden and knows to wee when he goes out.
I was looking tonight about puppy training classes where we could teach him some basic tricks and also a chance for him to meet and play with other puppies.

'Not ideal' is putting it a bit mildly , tbh, kid.

Can't you get a dog walker in to at least let him get out during the day?

I haven't thought of getting a dog walker, don't know anyone that could do it and don't really fancy handing a set of keys over to a stranger tbh. He is too young to go out at the moment, he hasn't had 2nd injections.

I only get 1/2 hour lunch break so couldn't make it home to see him, have lunch and get back to work. If I dad have the full hour, I would be able to pop home for 10 minutes.

Don't people leave puppies home alone?
My sister also has a dog. He is a bit older than my puppy, but she also works all day.
My old dog that we had for 13 years had the same life style and was just the most perfect dog ever.

I know I am probably saying all of these things to make myself feel better.

Well, I used to be a home checker for a dog rescue and we wouldn't have given you a dog or a puppy. A good breeder wouldn't either.
A dog walker could at least let puppy out in the garden and give him some company for a short while.
Your story and your attitude re keys is almost unbelievable, tbh.

Im amazed your pup is so well behaved when left alone.I left mine for 2minutes to sort my toddler out and he chewed through my Mac charger,it was plugged in at the time to,am pleased that he didnt get electrocuted!

Why is my attitude about keys unbelievable?
I have never had to give a set of keys to anyone before (other than family) so I have no experience/trust in strangers letting themselves in my house.

I am sure there are some very trustworthy homecheckers/dog walkers out there. But, having no experience of them myself, I wouldn't feel entirely happy to let a stranger in to my house.

Totallyfloaty35 - I have moved lots of things around in my house, made it as safe as I can for the pup. Some doors are kept closed (kids bedrooms) as I just can't guarantee that small toys won't be on the floor.

At what age is it considered acceptable for a puppy/dog to be left home alone?

A home checker doesn't get keys to your house. A home checker interviews you and visits your house to determine if you are a suitable home for a rescue dog.

imho, never acceptable for a puppy/dog to be left alone all day, 4 days out of 7.

I know lots of people will pile in saying their dog does just that and has never had any problems.

Have you made sure puppy can't reach any electric cables?

How do you know puppy won't get hold of something - anything - and either choke or swallow it and die of an intestinal blockage?

What makes you think a highly intelligent dog like that won't develop separation anxiety or just destroy your house through sheer boredom?

They will chew walls, skirting boards, dig through floors - anything.

I know people do this and I really shouldn't be shocked by it any longer, but I just feel so for the dog.

In 6 months time you'll be on here whingeing about how he's chewing everything, messing all over the floor, etc.

I shall leave now.

sorry you seem so angry with my situation BellasSparklyBaubles, there really isn't anything I can say that will change your opinion.

Each morning before I leave, I check the floors to make sure everything has been picked up. The puppy is small so can't climb (yet, but I know he will eventually)
I have 2 more days at work then we are all off for 2 weeks.

I have no way of knowing what he will be like in 6 months time, I will deal with that when the time comes. He is part of our family already and he will remain with us, even if he chews the walls, skirting boards etc.

You have been very supportive to me recently in giving advice with the puppy. I am very grateful for that but am quite shocked at your reaction to my puppy being left at home during the day.

Well, it's not just my opinion.

Dogs Trust

(who are, btw, a major canine welfare and rescue organisation)

I really hope you will at least get a dog walker in. At the very least.

dogs are sociable animals. it is unkind to leave them alone all day. what sort of quality of life is that for a puppy? my 5 month puppy can now be left for a few hours at a time. i can only imagine how distressed and anxious she would be if alone for 8 hours most days. why have a puppy if you can't meet its needs (which includes its need for company / stimulation etc.

Okay, been looking online about dog walking and the cost is quite high tbh. Not saying they aren't worth the cost, I am sure they are, but its just extra money for me to pay out on top of everything else I have recently started paying.

So, after Christmas, I plan to cycle to work each day. I think I can do it in 5 minutes or so at a push. So, as long as I get to lunch on time, I could cycle home, spend up to 15 minutes with the dog to walk him and fuss him, have a quick bite to eat and then get back to work again.

My other alternative would be to reduce my hours at work so I get a full hour lunch break which would mean less rushing about for me. I am not fit at all, cycling is so hard but will get easier.

I have taken on board your comments about him being home alone. He is my little baby and of course I don't want anything to happen to him. I also want him house trained(!) and to grow up healthy and sociable.

I have also enquired about a dog training class that starts in January. Not sure if he will be old enough to attend or what the cost of the class is.

Madsometimes really sorry to have totally highjacked your post!

Kid, some vets do puppy parties aimed at small puppies to help their socialization which is really important at your puppy's age. Round here the puppy classes are for pups who have had their injections up until 20 weeks.

My puppy is 6 months and can be left now for 2 to 3 hours at a time if needs be but she does get destructive. She has recently taken books off the bookcase, chewed through the cable of 2 computer mice whilst DH had gone into the kitchen to make a cup of tea, goes through the washing basket, has eaten a bit off the Hoover, eaten some of the lid of the dressing up basket, eaten the stair carpet off the bottom stair, eaten my rose which was in a pot in the garden. This was all whilst we were in the house as we both work from home and despite having a ready supply of kongs, chews, toys and bones and daily off lead walks in the woods following the 5 minutes per month of life rule. I'm just grateful she hasn't started on any of the door frames or the furniture as a fair few pups I've heard of
do, my friend is minus the end of her worktop and the bottom of her kitchen units have had it.

I know dog walkers are expensive but dogs really are very social and 15 minutes at lunchtime really isn't enough to meet their needs. Maybe you could put a sign up and see if someone would do it cheaply for you. I'd consider walking another dog when mine is older for a pound or two, purely from the point of view that it would be company for mine who is very sociable and loves having other dogs to play with. Maybe someone local to you would feel the same.

Madsometimes, sorry to put a long answer on your thread and not say anything about your situation. We didn't get our puppy until 16 weeks so I haven't been through your stage. I have found it incredibly hard work though, worse for me than having a baby, but it gets easier much faster than a child and my puppy at 6 months shows tantalizing glimpses of being a well behaved dog!

You may have already got it but if not, the Perfect Puppy by Gwen Bailey is very helpful, I was inseperable from my copy for the first few days. I hope tonight is a better one for you.

Madsometimes - apologies for hijack - this should be my last one.

Kid - you might want to read what the RSPCA say about the 5 welfare needs of dogs, of which you are breaching at least two (toilet breaks and company):

here

This means that you are breaking the law, as laid down in the Animal Welfare Act.

Why don't you do the kindest thing and rehome the puppy to someone who will actually care for it?

I am so glad Bella has said all she has.

I added my earlier post without knowing just how long you are leaving a puppy on it's own for most of the week. I came back to the thread to see if there was anything else I could add and found your later post giving more details.

I had to leave the thread because my responses wouldn't have been as kind and measured as Bella's.

I am beyond horror that anyone could take a tiny puppy away from everything it knows, it's Mum and litter mates and leave it alone in a house all day. I am not at all surprised he's crying all night. He's confused and frightened. You are willfully being very cruel.

It's also worth adding that caring for a dog is going to be expensive. For life. Ours are all insured, is yours? Have you the money to pay for the vet when something goes wrong? Bills which can very quickly reach 4 figures? You already seem worried about the costs.

I am so with Bella on this.