Help! My budgie is destroying my house, I think in protest!

[fucksticks]

Does anyone know anything about budgies? and how to stop them eating my entire house bit by bit???

My budgie is an old lady now. Must be about 8 or 9 years old - ancient in budgie terms.
We rescued her when she was a year old from my Mum who bought her but didnt get along with having her and ended up keeping her covered in the cage lots.

With us she has always had freedom. She never has the door of her cage shut. She flies around as she pleases. In the summer we leave windows and french doors open and she never ventures out. She's been through two house moves with us too. She loves the kids and sits on their heads and hands - always pecks strangers though

Anyway, we recently decorated and in the process removed our lounge curtain poles, which were one of her favourite sitting places (she sat up there watching the world go by and pecked on the coving)
Since then she's been having a bit of a protest and is pecking at EVERYTHING!
She has pecked away a whole corner of my nice wooden photo frame, she's put many many holes in a massive lampshade on the lamp on my sideboard.
This morning I went out and when I got back she'd destroyed most of 2 magazines I left on the side!
Now I've noticed a corner of my expensive sideboard been chipped away!!!

She has planty of food, toys and things to peck in her cage.

Help!!! How can I stop her eating my house??

How do you catch them?

(1) You scream 'omigod omigom the bloody birds are back in the house. Somebody grab the dog!'
(2) You catch the murderous terrier mid-leap so that his jaws snap together on air and pull him out of the room. You draw the curtains so that the birds are calmer.
(3) You watch for ages while they swoop elegantly around the room, making a few snatch attempts and closing your eyes when they get through a curtain gap and slam against the glass
(4) you wait until they are too traumatised to move from the floor and then you cup your hands over them to put them out the window
(5)you see the evil spirit and drop the bird
(6)You repeat steps 3-5 until you are hardedned against the evil spirit.
(7) You put half-dead bird through window
(8) you note the house martin poo on the walls and floor and make a mental note to clean it up 'at some point'.

omg at the parasite

wannabe - sounds like you really know what you are talking about - thanks!
sounds almost exactly like toddler taming... wonder if the naughty step would work too?
My budgie is v friendly and can easily pick her up and pop her back in her cage (as long as she's not too high up - I'm a short arse!)
Will try your ideas first before moving him round.

Will update you !

You are amazing. I'd be shoving the dog in there shouting 'kill it, kill it' and slamming the door shut and leaning against it. Oooh to the flying against the window though. Oooh to the parasite too. FGS keep your windows shut! You need a barricade. I will come round with planks of wood and nail the windows up if you like.

my parrot actually does have tantrums. and screaches if you put him back in his cage when he doesn't want to go back.

am pmsl at this thread. It has tickled me. Who remembers the poster who had a bird in her kitchen and she got up on the counter to screech at it cos she thought it would scare it away? And then she fell off. And i laughed. Lots.

That parasite sounds fucking awful. I would be keeping a biohazard suit handy if i were you.
What if it has flu? You could have a new strain, swine flu would be nothing compared to this.