Help - 1 of my cats is weeing on DS1's bed! And the sofa, and anywhere else!

[2HotCrossBunsAnd1InTheOven]

I will try to keep this brief but any guidance would be helpful as DH is ready to have the cat put down

We have 2 ginger tom cats which we got together from Battersea cats home about 7 years ago. The younger one (now about 8-9) recently (about 2 months ago) had a sore behind which the vet said was like having piles (ow!). That was the time he started going on DS1's bed (and the spare beds and the leather sofa in the front room). As it was painful to go this was somewhat understandable. However he is all better now and has been for a few weeks but the weeing has not stopped - and last week it escalated to a poo on DS1's pillow . We are very vigliant about keeping the relevant doors shut but if any are inadvertedly left open even for 10 mins he will whip in there to do his business. It seems like he's waiting for the opportunity on purpose! It's costing us a fortune in washing the duvets and bedding and it's a shame for DS1, who's only 3. And frankly it's a nuisance to have to strip the beds at least 3 times a week.

DH has seriously lost his patience and is talking about rehoming etc. The cat knows it is naughty as he hides under our bed as soon as he's done it. I don't really know anyone who would have him and I worry that at Battersea he's too old to get re-homed. Also the other cat (about 10) would seriously miss his mate. I have suggested that we take him to the vet but I think it's behavioural. We have 2 DSs (3.8 and 21 months) and I'm 14 weeks pg with no3. I don't think I will be able to cope with a dirty cat in a few months time.

TIA

I don't think 'tapping' your cat on the nose and rubbing his nose in his faeces will help - if he is doing this due to stress then you are merely exacerbating the situation. It sounds like you are having a bad time and the cat does not understand why it was once okay to do this and now it isn't.

HotCrossBuns - sounds like you are going through a hideous time.

I have a very active 22 month old and she has learnt not to go anywhere near the litter tray. Probably still in shock as she tripped into it once (when it was due for a change - bleeeurgh) and I took her up to the bathroom, stripped her down and hosed her under the shower until I felt she was sufficiently cleaned.

MrsJammi - they are little blighters aren't they - a carpeted floor is obviously much nicer to go on than the wipe clean laminate.

When my house is finished there will be no carpets anywhere. All surfaces are going to be wipe cleanable to cope with everyones bodily fluids.

But at the moment I am staying somewhere with carpets and sprinkling masses of fine ground white pepper on them. Cats generally sniff before they do their business and the fine pepper is supposed to get up their noses and deter them from that place.

Not sure it works, but no illegal pees or poos in the last day and a half.....

I do know the temptation to 'euthenase' the cat. When I'm down on my knees, scrubbing up yet another piss or furrball I do find myself hoping he isn't one of those cats who lives to 25 years old or something ridiclous.

But then I find myself thinking of names for my next cat. I honestly can't imagine a home without a cat.

Just a thought - but I wonder if your cat is picking up on all the stress in the household at the moment.

We are going through a complicated time ourselves and I have wondered whether that could be a trigger for some of our cat's dysfunctional behaviour.

The pepper thing sounds worth a try - inexpensive and not offensive to humans! Could I really sprinkle it on DS's bed?

I did suggest to DH that if stress was causing the dirty behaviour then we ought not to add to the stress levels by being hard on the cat. Difficult though as it is not "acceptable" - not wanting to sound like Supernanny . Also we are careful to make sure that the timing from making the mess to having a tap on the nose is not longer than a few minutes - I had heard that cats forget what they have done! Also someone once told me that the tap on the nose is what mother cats do to their young?

I honestly think 'being hard' on the cat will only make it worse. They do pick up on your stress and his behaviour could well be at least partly in response to the other things going on in your life. If it were me I would:

wash everything that has been soiled in biological washing powder, to remove all smells.

get a Feliway diffuser

get a litter tray

ignore any accidents

keep your doors closed as much as possible

Good luck & HTH

Have to say I have never had any luck with the nose rubbing in the poo approach.

We had a female cat when I was a child who always, always did her business in my mother's bedroom. My mother used to repeatedly rub her nose in it, but it never helped. In that cat's case the only 'cure' was keeping her out of that room. For some reason that was the only place she did it.

My cat did a wee yesterday in the boys room. She always does it in the same place. it started when one of our cats was accidently shut up there. she has a litter tray. she is quite lazy and will also wee on the bath mats if they are on the floor or sometimes the doormat which is right next to the litter tray.
I think once they have been somewhere it always has a slight smell and they use the same place again and again. We even cut our underlay out and washed it in the machine! cue nice clean piece of thready rubber stuff vaguely resembling underlay!
solution - don't let cat upstairs, but this isn't easy.

ahh, let me add myself to this list of those suffering from inappropriate cat relieving...
We have 2 young cats, the tom is neutered. He has developed a habit of weeing wherever I happen to be - I think it must be some strange psychological compulsion...
Its not usually in the same place, but its always where I am. I think it is basically laziness.
Our solution is not to let him out of the kitchen

If a cat suddenly starts weeing and pooing indoors it could be down to some sort of stress, either from home, or from a neighbouring cat maybe. You can buy Feliway as a spray which can be sprayed on the places your cat has been doing its business. The feliway spray helps your cat to associate happy relaxed feelings with these places. You can also put down a small dish of cat biscuits in these rooms as cats don't like to do their business in places they associate with feeding. Once they have stopped pooing and weeing indoors you can get rid of the dishes. If your cat is being bullied by a neighbouring cat a litter tray is a must as they may not be able to use their normal places.

Good luck

some advice rather than criticism would be useful here people!

hotcross.... we trained a adult stray last year to use a litter tray successfully by putting poo she'd done elsewhere or tissue dipped in pee into the tray and gently showing it to her and giving her a cuddle. we never reacted to accidents she'd done elsewhere unless we caught her in the act in which case she was transplanted to the tray, nothing said, just relocated.

the first few times she used the toilet she got buckets of praise and she's not been naughty ever since.... in fact the damn thing comes in from outside now to use the toilet!

we've had trays for years and honestly, as long as they're in a corner out of the way babies don't tend to go at them, dd is 4 and ds is 2.5 and neither have ever gone at the tray and they really are the muckiest, messiest, fiddliest kids you've ever come across. it's just a matter of putting the tray somewhere where you'll notice if the toddler goes for it as they have no real business there iyswim.... ours have variously been; under the table (yuck i know but it was a tiny flat and that paticular cat only used it at night so it was always clean when we were eating), in the utility room and now in the corner of the dining room with some houseplants arranged around it so it's not overly visable.

i'd also highly recommend the wood pellet litter. we recently switched to it and it is slightly pricier but even dp agrees it's worth every penny for ease of cleaning, nice smell, not having bits of clay kicked everywhere and not getting filthy as quickly.

it could be a mixture of the cold and the new cat making him afraid to go out. the fact that he knows he's done wrong and hides but still does it suggests whatever is out there is scarier than the consequences of going inside and he's not likely to change his mind about that!

good luck

Well, I have given advice so presumably you don't mean me, Pinktulips?!

not you bella.... just as i was reading through there seemed to be an awful lot of negative comments given by people who didn't seem inclined to help the OP at all.

the cat has lived with her for 7 years and has clearly been well treated and is happy so all this nonsense making out she's being cruel to him was annoying me!

Thanks PinkTulips! I was ignoring the less helpful posts . Yes both cats have lived with us for a long time (pre marriage and kids) and are otherwise healthy and happy (if a little too well fed !).

The older (non-messing cat) is also adored by the next door neighbour and spends half his time over there with his elderly girlfriend (or used to before the arrival of their new ginger tom cat!). My cat which is causing trouble rarely went next door and I thought that the new cat would be an issue for the other one. Next door don't have a cat flap so the cats there use a litter tray so I wasn't sure it was really that which was causing the problems. I will talk to them about it anyway.

Rather sadly DH is so fed up he's saying that he never wanted cats in the first place, he's not clearing up anymore so either I deal with the mess or decide what to do about the problem as a whole. He's not feeling particularly generous at the moment but still .

about your dh..... dp behaves the same way towards the cats.... loves cuddles and the good stuff but if anything goes wrong 'they're your cats, i never wanted cats in the first place' drives me up the wall!

i'm guessing your dh isn't in the best of humour atm anyway though with everything that's been going on.

it might not nesessarily be the new cat, maybe he had a run in with a fox or a dog while outside and is feeling a little nervous as a result? or maybe he's just feeling the cold alot more now that he's older?

He wouldn't have had to have had a run in with next door's cat to be worried about it - especially if it is a tom (ie not neutered), the smell would be enough. However, it doesn't really matter what it is that's bothering him ... he's clearly unhappy to use outside so will need a tray and some re-education. Hope it works out and dh starts behaving better. My dh was just the same with our cat when he was ill.

Sorry I haven't read the whole thread but I am having a similar issue with one of my cats. The vet suspects cystitis could be causing the frequent weeing any and everywhere and has prescribed a course of antibiotics.