Thats it, I am done, if DH wants to keep the dogs he can sort them out. (WARNING - ranty and swearing)

[DustyTv]

The bloody dogs, again have messed all over the bathroom and kitchen (old house, bathroom downstairs). I am sick of it. I have done all I can to sort it but it is not working. MIL took the dogs for a week over Xmas for us and I have to say it was bloody lovely. When she asked if I had missed them I told her the truth which was no.

DH missed them, he wants to keep them, but he wont do any of the work to keep them. Yes he will clean up when they mess, but that is beside the point. He will feed them, but it is down to me to walk them as he wont.

I have had them at the vets to see if they have anything medically wrong and they don't. I have been to training with them again, dog behaviorist, but they were no help.

I told DH that he is going to have to help me sort them out and get back to basics with house training, but he just said no, and that we should expect it when we leave them on their own.

No we bloody well should not expect it, they are left at most for 4 hours occasionally, but for about and hour most days, while I am out with DD. They go all through the night without messing, why not in the day.

I have decided that when he gets home tonight I am telling him, that if he wants to keep the dogs then he is going to have to sort them or I will find them new homes.

He wants to keep them, I do not.
It is not hygienic to have them mess in the house. We have a nearly 14mo DD and I am pg with lo number 2, I do not want this mess. I have enough on my plate.

Sorry for the rant, but feel better getting it out.

Mil had one of those old-fashioned stone water bottles to put in the dogs kennel. Filled it up with hot water and the dog was fine. She also put old blankets in the kennel and draped another over the doorway to keep out draughts.

Dh used to crawl in with the dog (when he was a small boy I hasten to add) and said it was toasty warm in there. If your 2 dogs are in together then they will be fine.

TBH I could get MIL to give DH a good talking too, but I think I will 'break' him tonight lol.

I am determined and once I have dug my heels in no one can move me (stubborn old cow me )

I don't really want them to go, I want them to just stop messing, it not a big ask.

I am just going to tell DH that if he wants to keep them, then he is going to have to take responsibility for them, i.e walk them etc. As will not do it anymore. And if he doesn't take the responsibility then I will re-home them while he is at work.

They do not have any other behavior issues and are good as gold when around DD, not that they are around her much as I don't trust any dog around her without supervision. Chyna esp is very gentle and good with DD, molly just stays out of her way TBH.

I think you should re-home them.

I am going our now to my mums and taking the dogs with me so at least my bro can take them on a marathon walk today (bro lives next door to mum and dad).

Thank you for all of your advice.

I think they should be rehomed..your dh doesn't really love them or he'd get off his arse and walk them

Do be a stubborn old cow about it! It sounds like they are not happy not being the centre of attention and you'd all be happier if they were rehomed to someone without children.

I hope you do manage to talk your DH round for the sake of your own sanity.

Best of luck
xx

Well, I've spoken to DH and to say he is not happy with me is an understatement

I am truly fucked off and so fecking angry it is not on.

I just said to him, that he needs to take more responsibility for the dogs and he needs to walk them.
He started arguing with me saying that I should walk them too as they are also my responsibility, but I do walk them as well he knows.
He kept saying that you do not get rid of family members, I told him if that is how he felt then fair enough but I do not want the dogs anymore so he will have to take all the responsibility for them,. He said I was horrible for saying that I don't want them anymore, I told him it is the truth, that is how I feel.

He is now out walking them and has said he will walk them everyday after work, I thanked him but added that they need at least 2 walks a day, he said he will not get up early to walk them

I asked him how he thought I was going to manage once number 2 is here, pushing a double pram and walking 2 dogs, he didn't answer.

He is now in a bad mood with me, I am fucked off to say the least. The only compromise he is willing to take is by walking them once a day after work. that is not fair on them, but he will not hear of having them re-homed.

I seriously feel like saying that until he takes more responsibility for them then DD and I are going to my mums to stay and he can decide what he wants to do.
I wont though cos that would be an over reaction, but that is how I feel and I can't help how I feel.

They are 8 and 9 and have accidents if you leave them for 4 hours?

If your DH won't get up early to walk the dogs, it kind of shows that he likes having them around, but isn't prepared to do the work involved in owning a dog.

It would be kinder to rehome them....

It would be kinder to re-home them, I see that Dh wont see that, he just wont hear of it.

It is not accidents, they do this when I am in the house and the back door is wide open so they have access to the garden. They squat down in front of me and do it before I can stop them.
yesterday morning, I had to go out to get DD some more Calpol (bad teething and I ran out) I was out for 50 minutes, the dogs had had access to outside all morning (I had been up from 6am, I went out at 8.15am). When I got home the bathroom and kitchen were flooded with pee and scattered with poo.
That is no accident.

They just do not like going out to the toilet when it is cold. I have to shut them out there but they hold it in and do when inside.

It is when they are left longer that they mess less often . they go all night, every night without wanting to go out and do not mess.

What about a dog walker?

They come and pick the dogs up, take them for a walk and bring them back, usually knackered!

That would be a good option, are they quite expensive or reasonable? How would I even find one where I live?

DH has just come in BTW and will not even look at me, so I know he is pissed off with me, but he has no right to be, I am the one who has every right to be angry not him.

I am off to bed early with a book and a cuppa, he can sort out DD and put her to bed.

Do you (runs for cover) rub their noses in it, shout at them until you are hoarse and cuff them when they mess indoors? I would with mine (un pc dog owner). It works [shrugs]

Seriously though, I know we shouldn't hit our children but dogs are different (people seem to forget that) and unless it is gratuitous (i.e. likely to injure them) it is okay to use controlled physical punishment with a dog - it is after all how a dam keeps her puppies in line. I would add the rider - physical punishment is to be used sparingly

Your dogs have formerly been house trained and are doing this for attention. They need to be a little fearful of the consequences of repeating this

(scared of returning to this thread now, for fear of pitchforks!)

Stick them outside - they are dogs they will not freeze to death especially if you get a kennel big enough for the both of them - we live in the country and there are lots of working dogs round here that sleep out all night.

No I don't rub their noses in it, but I would be a liar if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mine TBH.

When they started doing this, I kept my temper as a lot of the time they had done it when out so they wouldn't know what they were being told off for IYSWIM.

BUUUUUT now, I scream, shout, swear and generally turn into a screaming fishwife. God only knows what the neighbors think of me

I screamed so much this morning I was in tears, I mean I slipped on the dog wee and ended up sat in it, I had only had a shower 10 minutes earlier and had to have another one. I was fuming. On top of that I am pg and do not need to be falling over, esp in dog wee.

Our shed is getting cleaned out at the weekend (only store junk that we don't use. The dogs can have that with lots of blankets etc for when I am out, they can come in at night.

DH wont look me in the eye, he is only talking to me when I speak to him. He is angry with me, I really don't like him much at the minute. I mean what have I done wrong, nothing, but he is mad at me.

You poor thing.
You have my total sympathy as my xp had much the same attitude as your dh.
He had a dog before we met and then he wanted to get jack russell pup.
He would only walk them when he wanted to - wouldn't put himself out ever. I walked them in the rain, the cold, when i was pregnant, with the buggy - basically all i should have done as a responsible dog owner.
Couldn't believe it when he left me and then came back the next day asking for 50/50 custody of the kids and to take the dog!! He hadn't walked her for about a year!! Sent me wild!

On a serious note, i would say putting them outside when you go out is a great idea and maybe seek some advice from a local behaviourist about them doing it in front of you. Sounds like they got issues!

Put dh in the shed as well

How about taking them training? A good dog behaviourist would be able to give you tips and advice to stop the incontinence

My mums dogs (part time working dogs) get one walk a day; sometimes none - they don't mind and they survive. Don't stress it if you can't get them out one day or only once a day - it's really NOT the end of the world.

Two words for you: Jan Fennell. I know she's not universally popular in the doggy world, but I use her techniques with my dogs and have no problem behaviour with either. There are books, or a DVD - I've passed on the "message" to several friends who have also been amazed at the changes in their dogs.

It'll help if your DH also joins in, but you can do it alone.

I feel so sorry for your dogs - what an atmosphere for them to be living in.

Dogs are not malicious and if they are doing this now when they weren't before then there will be a good reason for it.
All the screaming and shouting won't be helping and please do not rub their noses in any mess.

I do not think it is fair to banish dogs who have previously enjoyed a family/indoor life to a shed no matter how many blankets you provide them with.

Re-home the poor things.

Rehome them and please do not get any more pets. Poor things.

They are dogs not human beings. They will be fine in the garden and shed during the day. It will make them aware of their position in the pack and will de stress you. Let your DH clean up the mess in the garden as he loves them so much.

Don't blame you for feeling the way you especially with no reasonable support.

Well DH got up early this morning and walked them, I think I got through to him last night
I have just gotten back in from the doctors and they have been on their own since 11am (I had to walk there) and have come back to no mess at all .

I am going to take them to the park in about an hours time for an hour or so and then DH can walk them again when he gets home tonight.

I know they are not malicious, I never said they were and unfortunately sometimes I cannot help shouting when they pee, especially when I end up slipping in it.

I have tried all I know how to try, the behaviorist just told me to go back to basics with regards to house training and basically start again with them both.

I will have a look into Jan Fennel, thank you.

I am still going to put them out in the shed and get DH to build a run for them, and they can go out while we are all out and come in when one of us has come home. I think that is fair.

my dog is exactly the same and i dont like mine either and that is probly why the are acting like it, not much help i know. i know shouting and scream does not help but its hard when youve got kids germs! urgh! i think its all down to attention.mine sometimes does a wee outside then 5 mins later comes in and poos it gets you so mad! im as fed up as you you have my sympathy.