Should we rehome our rescue cat before the baby arrives?

[MrsxS]

Myself and my husband have two medium sized dogs, and two rescue cats. One cat has been with us for 11 years and the other we rescued at the end of 2024.

She was a mature cat, who’d been kept in a garage on her own after her owner passed away. She was rehomed by a charity to us with “no medical problems” which was definitely a lie. She came to us with a terrible cough and we’ve had to have a lot of her teeth removed.

Unfortunately, her medical issues are ongoing and whilst she is happier and settled in our home she is clearly distressed in someway and is constantly peeing and pooing in different places across the house despite having clean litter trays and a garden to use. This has included on our beds, pillows and in quiet corners of all bedrooms. We’ve had everything cleaned with enzyme cleaners, kept doors shut for as much time as possible but this then limits her safe spaces and feels worse.

The last thing we would want to do is rehome her but we are now faced with our first pregnancy and after nearly 2 years the cat has not settled. I am worried that brining a baby in will upset her more and worry that she may mess on items that belong to the baby too.

I really want to do the right thing by her but can’t decide if that is keep trying or find a safe, quiet home for her with someone who has time and money to keep investing in her.

Any and all (kind) advice welcome.

Have you talked to the rescue about it? Rescues normally offer lifelong support and can give good advice on behaviour, or offer to take her back. The poor cat clearly isn't happy.

She sounds very stressed already,I suspect she would be happier in a home without other animals. I think this would be grounds enough to look into rehoming after 2 years of trying to get her settled.

My cat got dementia and was toileting in all the wrong places. She had arthritic hips, had begun to be a bit snappy when required to move from a cosy spot and I was waiting to know when enough was enough. She had a seizure which told me, and more importantly my teenagers, that it was time. Is your cat distressed or just getting very old?

She sounds like a very unhappy cat. I’d go back to the rescue and ask their advice and look to find her a more suitable home. If she’s still not settled after all this time, she’s not in the right environment for her. Sometimes it’s just not the right fit despite your best efforts and intentions. Sounds like she might need to be the only pet, your other cat and the dogs might be too much for her. She’s definitely not going to cope with a baby.

Thank you @Shouldbedoing ! I was thinking this at first but we’ve discussed with the vets and they are not concerned by that at this time. She remembers her routine etc. They are worried she is affected by her existing medical conditions and I would agree. We’ve tried our best to support her with these.

@NotDarkGothicMama I have tried a couple of times, they actually weren’t very helpful when we first got her and were questioning her cough. I think they were stressed and wanted “rid” of the more elderly animals.

We’ve gone to them a few times about the toileting issues and always received a “she just needs more time to settle” answer but I think I will try them again now of course.

Do you know how old she is? If she's very elderly then it might be kinder to PTS rather than put her through the stress of rehoming.