Cockapoo Owners: please tell me it gets better?!

[MissKittyFantastico84]

We are now the owners of a 13 week ago male F1B cockapoo. He’s been a delightful addition to our home in many ways, but I have to admit I’m struggling more than I thought, and would love some support, words of wisdom, or general camaraderie!

We also have a lively eight year old son on half term, which could be compounding things somewhat.

My husband has been sleeping on a campbed in the kitchen, next to his pen, since we got him. He’s managed to get away to sleep on the sofa nearby twice in that time, probably as a fluke. Puppy just loses it when he wakes up, and won’t settle unless someone is in the room! Is the likely to change at all? Obviously we’re willing to put the work in, so baby steps, but is it a lost cause?

I’m also just missing how easy our lives were - clearly we aren’t responsibility free, with a young son, but I feel tied to the house and all our free time is taken up by watching puppy. We’ve both had a few times away as a break (seeing friends etc) but it carries the same guilt as leaving your partner with a newborn!!

And oh my god, the biting. It really gets to you!

I don’t want to get rid of the little fella, not at all, and I’m looking forward to having him as part of our family, hopefully for years to come.

But please tell me it gets better!!!

Someone will be along soon with helpful advice but I’ll post to bump this. As a none dog person surely he needs to get used to sleeping alone?

Are puppies trained by having someone sleep next to them?

They will but its like a newborn. They need you close whilst they build the confidence to sleep alone.

The need to watch them constantly and the biting both get infinitely better when they lose their puppy teeth and get big teeth which is soon.

Puppies do need to be trained to get used to sleeping alone yes. And some find it a lot harder than others in the beginning
Puppies are bloody hard work. Equivalent to another baby early on and it can be a hell of a shock to a first time owner.
Id advise employing the services of a local trainer to do a ‘puppy home start’ visit to your house to get you on the right track. Prevention of problems is always a damn sight easier than fixing them and I’d expect a bit more progress than you’ve had so far at night if you are setting the puppy up to wean off dependence correctly

Our Cockerpoo (mainly spaniel) is now 11. When she was a pup she used to howel at night if we tried to have her in her crate. We ended up letting her sleep with us (oops) and she slept happily but never left our bed from then on. Spaniel crosses are crazy energetic for years but they do calm down when they reach seven or so: enjoy them. Our girl is nearing the end of her time and I’d give anything to rewind the clock. It is challenging though, I do remember.

I have a two year old cockapoo, she sleeps in our room in her own bed on the floor. I slept downstairs on sofa with her for two weeks while she was toilet training when we first got her

please don’t panic. We are at the other side now - ours is 6 months old. I’m not saying this is the right way to do it but this is what we did - pup in crate (with cover over it so they can only see out of the front). She was taken out for final toilet break then put in crate - every time she went in crate we gave her a treat so she saw it as a positive space. First couple of weeks we slept in same room but out of her sight and took her for a toilet break every 90 mins for first couple of days then went longer in between until about 8-10 days in when we slept until she made a noise to go out. Again, every time she came in from doing toilet bits and went back into her crate she got a treat. We also had classic fm on quietly for her so random external noises didn’t startle or wake her.
i promise it gets better - especially when the baby teeth finally fall out!

Puppies are very very very hard work. It is better after 6 months when they've passed the land shark phase, and are toilet trained. You've got another 13 weeks to go. ;-) I've never slept with puppies. They've gone in a cosy crate, and been left. Just toileted at 3am. They're worth the effort.

Thank you everyone! I really appreciate it. For those who just left puppies in crates, how did you deal with the crying/barking/howling?! Is it just the puppy equivalent of cry it out?

My sprocker boy is 6 and I remember the puppy days being a lot - you have to build them up to being apart from you literally starting with a few minutes and working up. Mine is perfectly happy being left now but ime cockers in general just prefer being around their people. I'll be honest mine sleeps in my bed and loves being little spoon 😂

I'd recommend teaching a settle ASAP.

The biting was bad (mine was nicknamed the sprockerdile) but it passes. It really does get better!

Sorry if I have missed it, but how long have you had the dog @MissKittyFantastico84 ?

@Sprockergirl sprockerdile. 😆🐊

We have a different breed, but I slept downstairs on the sofa for a couple of weeks. He ended up being fine downstairs on his own (though he now has run of the house). And is fine being left home alone, no separation anxiety.

There’s no more advantage to leaving a puppy to cry it out than a child. There is of course an element of luck, but not leaving him to be frightened has probably helped him be confident.

@zovhe’s been with us since mid-Jan

@Sprockergirl It would seem we must have a ‘cockadile’!!!

I would not recommend letting them bark in the crate as he risk causing separation anxiety, which is a nightmare. I think people expect a lot from puppies, but he is 3 months old and probably only with you for a month. So you have a good long while yet before things get easier.

My advice isn’t helpful for you op but anyone else considering a poodle cross just DON’T.

My miniature poodle wasn’t hard work as a puppy, she was really easy.

... my cookerpoo has conquered the bedroom.
She started off sleeping downstairs but somehow managed to get her bed moved right next to mine. 😆
I did draw the line at actually sleeping on the bed

Ours is now 5. She is a dick. Love her but she is a dick.
when we first had her we did a lot of sleep training in the day as well as at night. So when coming out of crate, getting her to wait before letting her out, then into the garden for a pee, then some free time. When the crazies come that’s a sign of being over tired, outside for a pee and into crate with a chew or lick toy with heart beat teddy and the posh lady from radio 4 on. Rinse and repeat. At night all of the above but no play time. Posh lady from radio 4 all night, heart beat teddy. Out for a pee a couple of times and back into the crate. Training in the day will help training at night.
Ours still thinks she is Steve McQueen front the great escape and digs under the fence to take her self out over the field behind us. She has a tracker on now that texts me as soon as she leaves the garden. As i said, she is a dick.

My personal routine for getting puppies used to sleeping alone…..
I don’t do a full ‘leave them to cry it out’ I put puppy in crate. I sleep in camp bed next to crate. I’m visible but ignore the pup. I offer presence but not eye contact ,talking,petting etc. Pup might whimper and fuss a bit but will generally settle. Gradually over a period of days I move further away with my bed as the pup gets used to it. At that point I will go back to sleeping upstairs. I’ve never had a pup take longer than a week of two but some clients dogs take a bit longer (generally because they’ve been doing other variations before coming to me for advice and the puppy therefore more established in a habit) to get used to it. The important thing is to be careful not to give attention beyond physical presence so the puppy learns to self settle

Join dog training advice and support group on Facebook and read all their guides. Also go to puppy class and when you graduate ask the trainer about next level of class like for kennel club bronze or Imdt levels or whatever scheme. (The scheme doesn’t matter, the training and support does).
I have a 1.5 year old cockapoo. I thought I’d never be able to leave her home but she stays home happily for say 3-4 hours and I don’t intend to increase it. I didn’t really do anything, just waited for her to get older. My dog sleeps in my room in a dog bed. She walks nicely on the lead, recalls well from a group of dogs, socialises well with other dogs and people, does tricks, stays in bed when the postman or similar arrives so I don’t have to worry about her running out of the door, is the sweetest dog around small children… I cried a lot during the puppy stage and worried I had ruined my life. It’s like having a baby and it was so intense. Now my dog is an absolute dream and anyone who meets her says so. They are such a clever trainable breed and really fun as long as you do the training.

It gets much better quite quickly. I slept in the lounge for a while with dog in the crate. Eventually managed to move back to bed. Dog is now nearly 9 and just sleeps in the kitchen, lounge or dining room. Abandoned the crate at about 18 months when he was less of a pain. He does still respond to the name 'twat' though. I was a teacher and got the dog at the beginning of July. Went back to work in September and felt like I'd had no holiday at all. Would have cheerfully given him away. That must have changed as now he also responds to the name "mummy'sspecialbaby".

It definitely gets better! Ours is now a year old and an absolute delight! But we have definitely had points when we’ve thought what have we done 😭 we were also sleeping on the floor next to the crate - all totally exhausted! We then got a trainer in who really helped with both sleep and biting. They advised us to move the crate to our bedroom, puppy was happy because he could see us and went happily to sleep. The trainer advised us to gradually move the crate out - so out into the hallway just outside our room, and then further down the hall etc. We didn’t bother doing this as we were quite happy for him to sleep in the crate in our room. He’s recently started sleeping downstairs on his own and no longer in a crate. The trainer also advised us to use a house line - helps when puppy is biting. We also had a pen - which we used when we needed the puppy to calm down and was super helpful to keep kids and puppy separate when needed.

Our cockapoo will be 2 in May. I've almost forgotten those early weeks - you've reminded me of the super-sharp teeth, but he didn't bite as such, I think it's called mouthing. Just pass him a toy when he is in that mood.

We had terrible problems with shoes, and it's not really a thing now.

As for sleeping, we never made him sleep alone. He sleeps on my bed, or next to it. He has a mat in the hallway that he sleeps on when we are downstairs.

The only time we used his crate was when we went out - 2 hours a week. He had his toys in there and was happy during that time. I don't think he would have settled in his crate when we were around. Now when we are out, he waits for us in the living room window.

He is an absolute delight - straight from central casting.

I felt the same as you 9 years ago! I thought what have we done, but as everyone says it gets better. Are there puppy training classes nearby? These helped me to bond with my little demon! I really disliked him and felt so awful for disliking a puppy - but puppies are hard hard work.

You need to start training now, even at home. Teach the pup to wait, stay, etc this really helped ours to manage his impulses! Cockapoos are smart dogs and need mentally tiring things like tricks and toys. Also, don’t underestimate how much sleep a puppy needs - something crazy like 17 hours a day. If you have boisterous kids too I’m sure it’s a lot less with all the playing. I would put ours in his crate covered while I was in the room or nearby to just calm and sleep. When he was overtired he was even more bitey.

hang on in there, I love mine now more than most living creatures! Put the work in now and it will be worth in