I’d like to get a puppy advice please

[Cherryblossom200]

Hello!

I’ve been thinking of getting a dog for a number of years, I’m a full time single parent with one almost 11 year old daughter. I wanted to wait until my daughter was older until we considered getting a dog.

My daughter has adhd (not the hyperactive type) and gets anxious sometimes. She’s a huge animal lover, we have two cats which she adores. She has a natural affinity with dogs. I’ve always thought about getting a dog as I think it would be great company for her especially in her transition to secondary school. Recently I’ve found it quite lonely being on my own, my daughter struggles socially in crowded areas. So I’ve decided we need a lifestyle change, something to keep us company and to do things like long walks.

We would give it a loving home which isn’t too hectic. I walk everywhere so exercise isn’t an issue.

I feel it would be better to get a puppy as we have our cats and that way it would be trained the way we live. I would consider a rescue but as a first time dog owner I don’t have the experience to deal with a dog which has issues. Also we would need a doodle cross like a Cavapoo as my daughter tends to be allergic to certain breeds.

I’ve been doing lots of research as its something I want to take my time with, but I’m seeing horror stories about puppies in the first year or so 🫣 It’s scared me!! Not being able to leave the room without them crying etc. Is it that bad?

I’m completely open to advice as I want to get it right.

Thank you x

The only good advice I can think of is keep thinking, reading and talking about getting a dog or puppy until you really think you are starting to know all there is to know.

Each puppy/dog and family is different and the dynamics are different for each.

Ive always subscribed to breed temperament ideology, but have also read that that isn’t always true.

I had a labradoodle (with cats) and while she was brilliant, one of the cats less so - though he typically just avoided my dog.But like you I have read it is easier to introduce a kitten to a dog or a puppy to a cat.

My Dd got a Golden Retriever puppy from a reputable breeder (as it was her first dog) and with the breeders help chose the chillest laid back dog possible. They are totally besotted with him.

Re puppies and sleep. Some are good and some not so. But it usually only lasts a few weeks. Maybe it’s a bit like raising babies, you need to be flexible and work out what’s best for you and your family.

I know my DDs puppy was causing wrecked sleep, so they let him be in the bedroom with them - it solved the problem. When I h__ad my puppy, my ex refused to allow a puppy in the bedroom - so I moved and slept in another room with the puppy for a while.

The best book I have found is Gwen Baileys The Perfect Puppy.

You sound like you have already given this much thought and I’m sure you will be a good dog owner. Remember so many people just get a dog with far less thought than you.

I have read that cocker/cavalier poodle mixes are a handful - but there are probably many that are wonderful. If you are getting from a breeder and want just a pet - don’t get a puppy from a ‘working’ line.

I am going to foster soon (I have no cats), and if I meet my soul dog I will adopt.

❤️ just adorable xx

Yes, our dog can be left alone without any problems. He just goes from sleeping on one bed/sofa to another until we return.

However, our previous dog (a poodle 🐩) had absolutely awful separation anxiety and literally would cry non-stop for hours if he was ever left on his own. I think poodles are very prone to separation anxiety. We couldn't leave him alone at all.

We left her around 10pm and the kids were usually up at 5am, she slept through the night. She had a puppy pad in her crate but rarely used it. We got a pop up one from Amazon, it was flimsy but as she was small that didn’t matter. Absolutely find a pup that’s already used to children, noise, busy households. It
makes such a difference.

Edit to add I had a poodle mix terrier and she was high energy, digging the garden up when bored, I do not recommend them! I find shihtzus are great family dogs.

With regard to wanting a cavapoo, please do your research on heart problems in Cavaliers. It is quite a significant problem in the breed.

Just prepare for the biting, bruises and bloodshed. It hurts like hell.
Lack of sleep is a killer and so is housetraining but it doesn’t last that long, but long enough that you’ll get the puppy blues.

Some rescues have a lot of puppies at this time of year.

Start as you mean to go on, don’t bring puppy in bed unless you’re happy to have dog in bed, deal with an old dog in bed etc.
You can’t walk the dog far at all initially, 30 mins each way is far too long, we bought a carrier and popped her in that.
Budget for decent insurance, you’ll need it as vets bills are extortionate.

I’ve had a Labrador and a staffie. The lab chewed my kitchen, he would chew even in his sleep 😂 he was a beaut of a dog. The staffie hasn’t chewed any objects (just us) she was a flying vampire- DD spent a few weeks avoiding her. They’re now best buds. It’s just a hard four- six months I’d say.

Apologies for the late reply.
We got an 8 week old yellow lab puppy.
As others have said, early puppy challenges of nipping and jumpiness were a challenge with ND child, especially for the first 6 months BUT labs are smart and he soon worked out he had to behave differently with ND child and now their relationship is so special, ND child will even pick up the poop (with a pooper scooper) on a walk and he sleeps on their bed. They really love each other.
Labs are big, but super trainable, calm and super affectionate, He loves spending time with us, as we do him.
He’s genuinely brought a happiness to the whole family (and whilst the at least 2 daily walks can be difficult whilst working), the pros definitely outweigh the cons.

Ok, so…100% want us to get a dog 😊 today we went for a walk to our doggie park and bumped into a local dog walker we know. My daughter walked with the pack of 5 dogs like she was part of them. The joy I saw on her face was indescribable. Honestly it was like something out of a film, people even remarked how at ease she was with all these dogs.

There was one dog a golden retriever which fell in love with my daughter. It’s too big for us. But has got me thinking about different breeds.

I’ve looked at rescue sites and there are virtually no dogs which can be matched with two cats. This is obviously a deal breaker for us. I’d love a rescue but it might push us towards a puppy in the end.. breed still undecided x

Also to add we spoke more in that doggie park with this pack of dogs than I normally do on an average week. I loved the social aspect of it, I felt less lonely and like my social battery was full but in a good way 😊 That’s why I know this is the right path for us x

I’ve got a 15 week old puppy and went to the cinema this afternoon.

Having said that, it is HARD work. Constant, consistent 24/7 work right now to teach her and train her. I have cried a few times, and she is a good puppy. As in she sleeps through, no accidents and can be left alone few hours already and I’ve STILL cried a few times.

Get a companion breed. A Lhasa apso or a bichon. Something bred for being a good friend.

I wouldn't recommend a terrier of any kind as a first dog. I've had dogs all my life and this one has damn near broken me. So even if someone offers you a Patterdale, free (they're more likely to offer to pay you to take it away), don't.

I have my plan which feels right for us. Puppy seems a bit too intense and is the last option for us. I’m going to contact rescue homes and fostering places to see if they have a dog between 6 months until 2 years old. I’ve scraped the idea of going for a specific breed, although must be small to medium. I’ve decided to go for compatibility and how well the dog will work with our world. I think with an older dog we will have a better idea of personality. Plus I would like to give a homeless dog a home. It will take time and that’s ok with me, I want to make the right decision as it’s a big commitment.

If we can’t find the right dog then we will go for a puppy but this will be the last option for us. I just don’t know how I’d cope with the lack of sleep etc, it’s just too intense for me.

Sounds fab @Cherryblossom200 Keep posting. Exciting to follow the journey.

Thanks 🤩