Do your dogs struggle when left alone? How do you handle it?

[SouthernRev]

I’ve been wondering how common this actually is.

We’ve got a lovely dog who struggles a bit when left alone: whining, sometimes pacing, and very clingy when we get back. It’s not full-on destructive behaviour, but enough that I feel guilty every time we leave the house.

Just curious:

• Does your dog show any signs of anxiety when you’re out?
• Is it something that’s caused problems or changed your routine?
• Have you found anything that actually helps?

Would be really helpful to hear what other people’s experience has been.

yes, my dog has extreme separation anxiety and starts howling within 10 mins of us leaving. We both WFH so she’s never left alone. I know what training to do to fix it (look up Julie Naismith Seperation Anxiety expert, I can also recommend a trainer) however we have adjusted our lives to fit around never leaving the dog alone. For example, we take her to the pub with us, we make sure one of the kids are in if we go out, we have an army of people that love her & will dog sit in our village (helps she’s very cute & adaptable to going to other people’s houses with no issues) or I’ll pay a dog sitter. Also use borrow my doggy. I know my DP sometimes gets annoyed by it but it’s my dog I brought into the relationship so I take full responsibility for sorting this out & I’m willing to pay the money to do so if it involves dogsitters. Cos we both WFH I don’t find it impacts us too much. If the time comes when it does then I’ll do the seperation anxiety training. I did it with a previous dog & it’s the most kind & gentle method but takes commitment & time. Pls don’t listen to people who say to just leave the dog with a chew or something, if it’s true separation anxiety over time it’ll just get worse if you keep leaving the dog & the destructive behaviours will increase.

No. I’ve had several dogs as a kid and three of my own. Most were rescue dogs and never had any separation anxiety. Ive asked neighbours in the past and they say they hear nothing. My last two were from puppies and I trained them to be on their own for a few hours, though more than three/four hours would be unusual. But occasionally they are. I came home the other day after being out for six hours and she was asleep on the sofa.
I don’t know how to cure it, I’ve just tried to make sure it doesn’t develop in the first place. Some breeds are more prone to it than others.

Yes mine does. I'm loosely doing Julie Naismith training with her. She's not destructive or overly barky just anxious and sits in a fixed position staring out of the window waiting for me to come back, some occasional crying. I do leave her for up to an hour a couple of times a week and try and do shorter absences most days.
I'm in my own with her so it's very limiting and stressful, but for now I've just had to adapt to it and continue to slowly work on it. She's a rescue with a difficult history so it's not necessarily unexpected just very challenging to live with.

Mine has been awful . I managed to solve it last year by leaving him a bit at a time . So 10 mins popping to Tesco , then a bit longer and bit by bit he got a bit better where he wasn’t howling anymore then I got made redundant this year and I spend all my time with him now and it’s back again . My neighbour said he was howling last week and I heard him as I was walking down my path the other day so my DD went back for him and we had to take him to my parents before we went out .
He is like my baby and honestly I feel like I’m leaving a small child the amount of guilt I have leaving him , I try my best to not leave him by himself but sometimes we have too :(

It’s probably too late for this advice, given your dog is grown, but it’s the advice I give buyers of my puppies: go at the puppies pace. Prevention is better than cure.

But, that being said, DM adopted a spaniel with pretty severe SA (to the point she couldn’t pee without the dog laying on her feet). From the day my mum bought her home, she had to be physically touching my mum in some way or she’d panic - as you can imagine, it made things a bit awkward.

In the end, the only thing that worked was time and showing her that DM could be trusted and would always come back.

What breed is your dog, OP? Some breeds are so much worse for this than others - poodles, cocker spaniels, retrievers, etc. And how long do you leave for? Coming back before they start crying is key, and working up from there.

Ours is a rescue and to begin with would either bark constantly and/or pee if left. We tried crating him and he's so much happier - the theory is he doesn't have the feeling that he has to protect the whole house and he's not as scared because he's got his own little 'safe' space. Also he can't see out of the windows to see anyone walking past, neighbours cats coming in to the garden etc. He does have natural light but the window faces into the conservatory so there's no cats or birds sitting on the windowsill winding him up, and we leave a light on if it's evening. He has his bed in the cage, and we always leave him with a couple of long lasting chew treats - as soon as he sees us getting the cage ready now (we don't leave it up all the time) he sits by the treat cupboard until he's sure we've remembered the chicken twists then trots happily into the cage as soon as his bed is put in there.

MIL has found exactly the same thing with some of her previous dogs too.