Moving house - what about our cat?

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Hello, I am looking for some non judgemental advice.
My family and I will be moving house in around 6 months or so. We only have one pet, who is an 8 year old cat. Over the last few years (since having our daughter) we have noticed that he has been spending more time out than in. He usually just comes in to eat, or when the house is empty he comes in to sleep. But when we come home he goes straight out. He's also not particularly affectionate anymore, he doesn't like being cuddled and will only accept strokes for a few minutes before batting your hand away or nipping you.
We are unable to put a cat flap in at the new property. The cat - at the moment - comes in and out as he pleases as we do currently have a cat flap.
The issue I need advice with is: when we move, we will have to let him in and out but we'd have to do it on a schedule otherwise it'll be unmanageable. But we have also discussed the idea of re-homing him.

It's worth noting, he doesn't deal well with change, but also I feel strange about re-homing him because I feel like we're abandoning him.

Well you would be abandoning him. And I’m not sure of your reason of actually rehoming him? He has to move anyway, hes going to be even more distressed with a new home and complete strangers, rather than just a new home?

What is the reason you can't have a cat flap? As we may be able to think of a way around that.

I’m not sure why you’d rehome him, that would be a bigger change for him.
Really it’s just about trying it in the new home and seeing how he responds to a schedule; I see cats waiting on people’s door steps or by windows to be let in so I guess they don’t have a cat flap

No cat deals well with change, so he isn't special in that regard.

He'll need to stay inside for a couple of weeks after the move so he imprints on the house and can find his way around when he's out again, so you'll need to ensure he has plenty of toys, climbing and scratching posts, beds, extra litter tray, etc. I'd get those now so they aren't yet another new thing he has to adjust to. When you do let him outside at the new house, bag up some used litter and place it around the garden so he can sniff his way home again. It shouldn't be necessary for more than a few days or so.

Rehoming him shouldn't be on the agenda, there's loads you can do to make this work. I've had a cat and no cat flap, you do get into a routine with them and it isn't a huge deal.

Rehome if you can, it doesn’t sound like you want him anymore.

I'm reading that you don't actually want your cat anymore. You're not getting any joy from them and it seems you've not got on their wavelength by understanding that they don't want to be touched for more than a moment.

One of my cats is like this yet he will come and sit beside me and listens when I talk to him. We gain enjoyment from each other and he gets a roof over his head and food. It works for us but I guess that isn't an arrangement you'd want. You want them to act like a fun and loving pet but he's not complying.

Is there a possibility that your cat is going to other houses, maybe just hanging out in a quiet garden? Is there any possibility that a neighbour might take them on - offer them a home. Unless you are prepared to take them with you, this would be less traumatic than other options.

Can I request you re-read the post and the comment made about "non-judgemental advice"

We’ve had our outdoor cat become an indoor cat- basically our other cats were knocked down and we decided it was the only way to go. Within weeks she’d decided beds and couches were better than the outside world and now she goes out for a few minutes then comes in.

It is a rented property, we are not allowed

Okay thank you! I didn't realise this was something that could be done. Do you have any tips on how to do this?

You could also look into building a smallish "catio" so he can spend some time outside without him wandering, the lack of cat flap won't be as big of an issue then.

The house move is a great opportunity to reset his habits.

I definitely do want him. It was more of a worry. I think when my daughter came along he feels a bit like he's been replaced. Or even that he is just getting older. I do like having him around and my daughter loves him. I took him to the vet for a check up just in case he was getting ill but they said he was fine. I just am nervous about what he'll be like if we move and if it will upset him or he'll run off

Literally just keeping them in, petting tons, treats, toys. Have a litter tray. We kept putting her on the spare bed (during the day!). After a while she was just thrilled to be a pampered cat!!! Probably o ly let her out after two weeks but then called her in with food and now she literally goes out for a few minutes over the day

Do not leave your cat!

I’ve never had a cat flap, neither do most of my friends with cats. Just open the door? Not really sure what the issue is.

If you aren’t around to let them out then the cat can’t go out, which is fine. Just let them in and out when you are able.

You'll need to keep him in for 3 weeks or so till he sees your new house as home, don't let him out before that. I moved with a 9 yr old kitty and he soon settled in. Could you leave a window a bit ajar to allow him in/out access? Cats adapt really well, even if they are grumpy!

When we moved house we kept our cat (who had previously spent a lot of time outdoors) inside for about three weeks. We used a litter tray. We then let him outside and he adjusted perfectly to his new home. I actually think he prefers this house to his previous one, and now tends to spend a lot more time indoors. He’s 11.

My 13 year old, previously indoor cat moved twice in 9 months. I had her from a kitten in a flat (failed foster) till I moved her to my partners temporary. She adapted fine and choose her place to sleep. She was allowed outdoors for first time and stayed close.

I moved to my new build and again she choose her place to sleep. Kept her in for 6 weeks. Mostly as my garden was mud. Once let out she only stays in the garden. I planted cat grass and she has a water bowl. She loves it as safe and no cats.

she is less affectionate now she goes out lots. But she does still want her night cuddles and will come up for a pet. She never was that affectionate, but less so now outside. Think it was more stimulation that she gets exploring outside than from me.

Do not rehome your cat. You made a commitment and he should be part of the family. There is always a solution.

That said, as per PP's keep him inside for at least 3 weeks. You can use a feliway plug in to help him stay calm (Link here) and put catnip in his bed.

Is he neutered?

You landlord cannot prevent you putting in a cat flap, particularly if you have permission for a cat. You can get panels in many doors removed and replaced on departure and install one with a catflap. You can also replace panes of glass in windows with outside access to install a catalpa and, again, replace when you leave.

You might also consider a lock latch if appropriate, this is a device you attach to a window or door to allow your cat the ability to go in and out but prevent intruders. Link to lock latch. Obviously, you need to be careful where this is placed for security.

Hope the move goes well.