Euthanasia/dog :( grief

[4658Lou]

Had posted a chat and I can’t seem to find it to see replies so I’m posting again…my lovely nearly 6 year old dog was PTS a few days ago and I have such guilt and upset he was/is the most gentlest warm loving quiet dog I ever knew he is a Boston terrier so young he was only just nearly 6 but started having problems about 2 years ago it was discovered he Hemivertebra which was causing is straining to go do a poop this happened mostly all the time he would have a few good days then stop pooping again and straining it was a cycle. I feel so guilty could o have done more could I have paid more insurance to get it covered but the vets wanted payments upfront before I claimed… some people just don’t have that kind of money upfront (hundreds and thousands to hand). My dog had following symptoms:

not pooping properly straining most days.

seizures (would get cluster seizures then stop for a few weeks or a few months then happen again randomly).

alot of weight loss

ceased drinking water

Incontinence of urine and poop

could the above be caused by Hemivertebra?

im just trying to work through my grief and I guess I have alot of unanswered questions and wonders but he was such a quiet dog that how did I not know with the straining that he wasn’t in discomfort his last day he looked so thin even though he was eating. I’m curious how he could survive without drinking though and why would a dog stop drinking? x

(I paid private for a home PTS so he could be comfortable)

You did the right thing. Deep down you know that but your grief is overwhelming.
Sadly a lot of people won’t have the money to pay for their pets care and that will influence the choices they make. Times are hard at the moment.
You loved your pet and didn’t want them to suffer, it’s a choice you made with love.

Ah mate. My ddog was PTS 30 years ago and I still get occasional pangs of guilt about it. It was the right decision though.

It's really tough. Sending love

@RicePuddingWithCinnamon i know the vets were talking about sending him to a neurologist etc and that he would need enemas under general he had already had one and cost £700+ that all the insurance didn’t even cover, if it’s the same condition you can claim over and over again it’s U.K. to a certain limit or something. The not pooping last nearly 2 years I just really had to be on the ball with it give him laxative but if he went more than a few days I would panic he just strained all the time but then the weight loss happened and the incontinence he started weeing and pooing were he slept or in the house and stopped drinking … but fed fine but wasn’t gaining weight, weeing lots but not drinking I don’t know if it was this spinal problem or something else going on too especially with seizures aswell

times are hard your right even to buy things from the shop like food and stuff it’s really expensive so how vets think people have thousands to part with while waiting for insurance I don’t know. It was heartbreaking I love my dog so much I just wanted the best it was the headrest decision I have ever had to make x

@MassiveOvaryaction aw I’m sorry for your loss so long ago. I’m same I think i will always feel guilt right now it’s so raw can’t stop crying. I just wished I had loads of money to get everything ver advised the neurology referral but just because there is some treatment doesn’t make it right he stopped drinking and was not pooping properly :(

Hi OP, I'm a vet and just wanted to say that I'm sorry you had to make that tough decision and that your lovely little guy had to go at such a young age.

But his symptoms sound like they were very severe, and yes sure, in an ideal world it would be great have a neurologists' opinion, but that may not have been simple either, and it doesn't mean it would have changed the outcome - especially with symptoms that bad.

So I think that PTS under these circumstances was very justified and I'm sure it was not a decision made lightly by either your or your veterinary team.

I know personally how hard it is to have to make a euthanasia decision, but it sounds like it saved him a lot of suffering, so please do not feel guilty. You did a kind thing for your poor boy who you clearly loved. Big hugs and take care of yourself.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pets/4998879-my-beloved-dog-just-passed-feeling-guilt-euthanasia?reply=132718463

@SoupDragon thank you! I couldn’t find my orginal post i wanted to read the comments x

@Mmmmpavlova thanks, I think that’s what is most difficult was that he was so young and started having issues 2 years beforehand. When they did the removal of all the built up poop they showed me on X-ray it was so much and that’s when the vet said Hemivertebra was present on T13/L1 of his spine and could be the source of this chronic longterm ‘constipation’ he had but the vet said the actual poop was pretty soft she suspected because of the spinal issue he was having trouble pooing because of this but on top of this he started to loose a bunch of weight, stopped drinking and had seizures obviously without examining a dog you couldn’t say definitely but from those symptoms could that have all been because of the Hemivertebra?

Yes his symptoms just kept coming then he started to wee and poo in the house :( which he never did before and yes sure, in an ideal world it would of been great to have a neurologists' opinion, but he still couldn’t poop or wasn’t drinking etc and along with straining and seizures I was like on tender hooks when the next seizure would come because they got bad one last time a few months ago lasted 5 minutes

I am thank you I feel such grief but trying to work through it. I love my boy so much I just wish he had been well or something that was easily fix I tried everything , change of diet and laxatives etc but doesn’t change he had a spinal condition he was born with :( x

@4658Lou I'm not a neurologist, but broadly speaking, things like constipation and the incontinence could be linked to spinal issues e.g. hemivertebrae... but the seizures and the unexplained weight loss point to something more complicated and/or sinister going on. More than that I couldn't say, but it paints a picture of something that was never going to be very good news.

Take solace in the fact that he no doubt knew he was very loved; you did everything you could, and you made a kind and selfless decision to prevent him from suffering when things got bad. And remember that PTS is a very peaceful process for them; they slip away completely free of pain.

I hope you can feel more at ease knowing that it was the right call in a difficult situation.

@4658Lou

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you and struggling with the same pain this week, as I had to let one of my precious furry friends go this week as well. I remember a saying, better one week too soon than one day too late. It sounds as though you really loved your precious dog, they were very lucky to have you.

@Mmmmpavlova thanks a lot for your reply it means so much to me. broadly speaking, things like constipation and the incontinence yes I thought so could be linked to spinal issues like hemivertebrae... but the seizures and the unexplained weight loss i thought perhaps might be separate to that another issue perhaps to something more complicated and/or sinister going on - maybe that’s right that it may have not ended well or for very long even with a referral and or anything else offered.

your words do comfort me thank you

Just curious generally speaking when a dog completely stops drinking for a very long time he must of been getting some moisture from his food? He didn’t take water for like 3 months but kept weeing normally

@overdogged thankyou and I’m sorry for your loss too isn’t it just the worse feeling
:(
“better one week too soon than one day too late” - those words are so true

I love my dogs so much they are family I have another dog who is nearly 12 and is looking for our beloved boy she keeps going to where he slept :(

i was lucky to be his fur mama I would change those 5 years 10 months for anything x

would not change*
i meant to say