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Original poster

Help with a difficult decision...

18 replies

Jcem13 · 21/10/2023 21:42

I'm looking for some help or advice on what is one of the most difficult decisions I've ever had to make.

Our beautiful cat is 7 years old. He's not been himself for a little while, and this week took a turn for the worse when he completely stopped eating and was shivering. We took in to Vets4Pets, they said they could feel a lump in his stomach and would need to do a blood test and an ultrasound, which they did while we were there.

The result came back that he has large mass in his intestine and blood tests showed signs of lymphoma. As well as some spots on his liver & a water infection.

They said the only way forward would be to carry out surgery to remove the mass and send off for biopsy. We received the estimate for this and it's come out at over £2000 plus the £400 bill from our visit the other day.

Unfortunately, we no longer have insurance, so any costs we have to pay for ourselves. (I know we should have it! But we don't, so please don't lecture me on that, I'm already hating myself)

Obviously I want to do whatever I can to help my little boy, but we just don't know what to do. He's clearly not well, but they have said that if they do the surgery and it's spread there's not much they can do and he would need to be PTS. If they are able to cut it all out he would still require further medication/treatment which they can't give a cost for because they don't know the extent of it yet.

The vet seemed to imply that she thinks it's not looking too good, but because if his age she wants to do the surgery just incase he can be helped.

I guess the reason for my post is to see firstly ... Is that cost genuine or are they trying to rip us off? £2000 seems so excessive to me!

Would you pay the price and take the chance of either prolonging his life for a period of time (been advised it could be 6 months or a few years) plus having further expenses for medications/treatments or potentially have to put him to sleep anyway, leaving us without our little boy and a huge bill.

Any help or advice would be much appreciated, thank you in advance

OP posts:
Curlewwoohoo · 21/10/2023 21:48

I'm sorry op! To be honest there's probably no bad decision here. I don't think you need to feel guilty either way. If you went with the operation, would they be able to tell there and then if its spread and not wake him up? That would be a consideration for me. I wouldn't want the op, him to wake feeling shit, then decide pts. If you don't want to put him through it and can't afford the operation then you're still doing right by him, as he's in pain. I think £2000 sounds like quite a good price actually. I don't have insurance for my cat either! There's no guarantee this would be covered. Ongoing care for anything related then wouldn't be.

Hermittrismegistus · 21/10/2023 21:51

I'd have the cat PTS.

He's had a happy life, has been loved and well cared for. Let him go as pain free and peacefully as possible.

cocksstrideintheevening · 21/10/2023 21:51

They're not ripping you off, that's the cost. I would have another discussion with the vet and ask them what the would do if it was their cat.

Slightly different but I have an elderly ddog with lumps and bumps all over and we have agreed with the vet that the trauma of biopsy on every lump isn't worth it for him, he's got good quality of life.

If your cat doesn't have food quality of life
then there's a decision to be made.

Sorry you're in this situation.

thepurplepenguin · 21/10/2023 22:19

We recently had our (slightly older) cat pts because of an intestinal tumour/lymphoma. We had insurance but our vet said surgery would likely end in her being pts on the operating table. We also refused short-term life prolonging medication like steroids as we felt that it would be for our benefit, not hers. She had also stopped eating and looking back at pictures of her from the final weeks I can see that her light had already gone out. I'm still sad but feel confident that we made the right decision. I would make the same decision in your shoes, despite the age of your cat. I'm so sorry that you're in this position, it is very painful.

RandomMess · 21/10/2023 22:29

We had our boy on steroids for 11 months, he ate again lived his life then one day he went missing for 24 hours. Fortunately he came back and we knew it was time Sad we didn't consider surgery an option at all tbh.

Original poster
Jcem13 · 22/10/2023 07:14

Thank you for your replies.

I was surprised that the cost of surgery seems to sound about right, I'm clearly out of touch with the cost of things.

He seems most ok in the mornings, has a wee in his litter tray and then eating a tiny amount of food. But then spends the rest of the day just laying around in the same spot. By the evening he is at his weakest.

I think deep down I know the answer, but there's always that part of you that wonders if you're making the right decision, or if you are giving up too easy.

Thank you again x

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 22/10/2023 07:32

Personally, I would PTS. It's not because of the money-although of course that's an issue. I don't believe in animals being given painful and invasive treatment particularly with an uncertain outcome-they can't understand that things will get better-they only know the pain they're in now. But I know that I'm more "robust" than many on this subject, and I know from experience the heartbreak. I'm so sorry, @Jcem13

Twimum23 · 22/10/2023 21:59

@Jcem13 bit different my dad had a sausage dog and she was only 5 and took her to the vets and her uterus had ruptured dad decided to go ahead with the surgery which was about £3500 but had then dreaded phoned call that night to say she didn’t pull through but how dad see it was that at least he gave her the chance I no that your cat is a bit older but I guess if u can afford it it would be worth it but with their age and not knowing if it will come back or anything I guess it hard

Original poster
Jcem13 · 22/10/2023 22:03

Thank you for your reply. It's actually been a relief to read!

We almost went for the PTS, but as soon as we booked it our cat started acting different,almost as if to say "don't give up on me". We called the vet back and have booked him for the surgery tomorrow.

I feel better knowing atleast we tried!

OP posts:
Twimum23 · 22/10/2023 22:09

Hope it all goes well for u

Wolfiefan · 22/10/2023 22:11

We had an older cat with a stomach mass. We nearly decided to PTS as her son had suffered with multiple stomach tumours. We decided to try surgery. It wasn’t cancer and she lived for years more. Wishing you well.

Twimum23 · 25/10/2023 06:04

@Jcem13 how did the surgery go ? Hope it all went ok

RedHelenB · 25/10/2023 06:10

I opted for the operation on my cat in similar circumstances. It didn't cost as much as yours though and I never insured them. Bur although they had a year or so more life, they were never the same. Having said that they were old.

Fleetheart · 25/10/2023 06:21

it’s really sad but I think it’s time. our cat had lymphoma- he had a lot of treatment (we were insured); it was a weekly visit to the vet, and he did recover and have another year, but then it came back and he had to be put to sleep. I wish now we had not gone through all that. It is very sad though and I feel for you ☹️

Original poster
Jcem13 · 25/10/2023 09:27

Unfortunately, we had to make the difficult decision Monday to lay him to rest. The Vet said the Tumour was so large that it was unlikely they could do much so we didn't want to put him through surgery or put him through any unnecessary pain.

We're absolutely devastated. The house feels so empty without him. I keep expecting his little face to pop up and shout my name (he used to call me "mau-wah")

How do you work through the grief? I could be fine one moment, and then the next a huge wave overcomes me and I'm a complete mess.

OP posts:
Hermittrismegistus · 25/10/2023 11:25

The grief will pass with time. Flowers

Twimum23 · 25/10/2023 11:52

So sorry

Fleetheart · 25/10/2023 20:47

you have done the right thing, he is at peace. it’s very hard, but it will ease. we miss them so much don’t we x

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