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Original poster

Should I put my elderly pet to sleep?

56 replies

Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 15:44

So my dog Misty is 13 years of age, she is a white German shepherd breed. She is struggling with her back legs, the vet said she has severe arthiritis which she will be in a lot of pain with, chronic ear infections and doggy dementia. She has given more pain relief gabeptenin, paracetamol and antibiotic ear drops, she has said no more walks and to keep her comfortable. She can get up to go to the garden for her wee and poo. However if she walks any more than this, her hind legs begin to tremble. She cries/whines a lot which is heartbreaking to watch but I don't know how to help her other than reassure her. I clean her ears twice daily but as soon as she shakes her head, there is a lot of gunk coming out, this has been ongoing for 3 years and she has had every treatment available so they just just prescribe more steroids and antibiotic drops. Since she has been on the pain relief - she is excuse my language - shitting and vomiting everywhere. We have had to make the decision to keep her downstairs now due to her legs (struggling to climb stairs) and pooing and vomiting. She sleeps all day but is eating and drinking fine. My question is I was heartbroken at the suggestion of putting her to sleep but I'm thinking more and more that it may be the best thing. I feel selfish for even thinking this. I'm 6 months pregnant and my hormones are taking its toll. I'm overwhelmed with it all. Please don't judge. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you.

OP posts:
Redavocadoes · 07/08/2023 17:27

I am so sorry you are faced with this decision at this time. From all that you have said it sounds like it would be the kindest thing to PTS now. To be honest I am surprised the vet hasn't suggested it, and that when you asked they have suggested a different treatments. Is it worth asking another vet - is there more than one at the practice?

Please don't feel that you will be judged for suggesting it, it is clear that you love your dog very much but she is approaching the end of her life with medical issues.

If the vet thinks it really is worth trying the different medication you could see if that makes any significant change in the next few days?

Newuser75 · 07/08/2023 17:28

Oh and absolutely no vet will judge you at all. I promise you!!

Giggorata · 07/08/2023 17:30

I agree with the general view here, it's time. So sad for you, but by being strong for your beloved pet, you are doing the right thing.

The huge thing I want to add is that, difficult though it may be, please be with your pet during the PTS process, as the physical contact and comfort is so important at the end.
I have been told by a vet friend that pets become distressed and look for their owners when the owners leave before they lose consciousness.

My old boy died in my arms and was calm and wagging a bit.
It is the best thing I ever did for him and made me determined to give all of my pets the best ending possible.

Original poster
Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 19:35

So the vet rang me back ( I only spoke with the vet nurse prior to this) the vet was amazing, so kind and compassionate. I explained everything, I said but she still eats and drinks and she said pretty much the same as all of you lovely people. She said sometimes it's better to let them go before they stop eating and drinking. She said dogs can be very tolerant to extreme pain and often they can suffer unimaginably before we as humans recognise this. She said if that's all she has from life and she can't go for walks etc she would think the same and it would be kinder to pts. She said they can offer other treatment but they are limited and they are not guaranteed to work, she also said she has a few ailments that regardless of what they give her, won't improve over time and will only get worse. I have an appointment booked for Wednesday, I will be with her until the very end. They had a slot tomorrow but I wanted one last day to spoil her. I can't stop crying but i know deep down its for the best. I just hope she forgives me and knows if I could have saved or made her last year's pain free that I would have.

OP posts:
Anewuser · 07/08/2023 19:43

My heart goes out to you @Jojobear18

Tomorrow will be a year since I had my dog pts.

It’s incredibly sad but you know it’s the right thing to do for her. She won’t be in pain anymore and you’ll be able to remember all the good times you’ve had.

I hope you make many memories tomorrow, and good luck Wednesday.

Clefable · 07/08/2023 19:58

You're doing the right thing @Jojobear18 Enjoy your last day with your lovely girl. You've given her a wonderful life, and you will be with her as she starts her journey to whatever is next. You've done good by her.

YoSof · 07/08/2023 20:02

You are doing the most kind thing for her, a final act of love.

Its time, and better a week too soon than a day to late when it comes to them being in pain.

You gave her a good life, she is so loved and she’s relying on you now to help her x

TheShellBeach · 07/08/2023 20:06

Aw OP, I know you're very upset but you're doing the right thing for Misty. 100% the right thing.
It's your privilege to allow her to die peacefully like this.

Random789 · 07/08/2023 20:08

Every word you write is full of love and kindness. You are doing the very best thing for your dear dog. It is not selfishness. It is the right thing. When all the agony of decision has settled down, you will look back and know that you saved her from more distress. You will see the whole of her lovely happy life and not just these difficult final weeks and days.

VinEtFromage · 07/08/2023 20:11

You're doing the right thing for Misty, don't doubt that!!

pain in dogs is like an iceberg, you only see the tip of it & they mask the rest.

is someone going with you?

Annaishere · 07/08/2023 20:15

Can you try her on morphine

Justlovedogs · 07/08/2023 20:20

I say this as a long time German Shepherd owner. Do not feel guilty, OP, and make the appointment. It is painful for you, I know, but it is nothing compared to the discomfort, both physically and mentally, that your dog is in. Please, for her sake, PTS and remember the good, happy times. Sending you very un-mumsnet virtual hugs and much love for your beloved GSD. Flowers

WingingItEveryDay7 · 07/08/2023 20:21

Enjoy your last day with Misty ❤️ If you can get some footprints tomorrow they'll be a lovely keepsake framed with a picture! Sending you much love xx

userxx · 07/08/2023 20:27

Amicompletelyinsane · 07/08/2023 15:51

As a veterinary nurse, I say pts. There's no kinder ending than stopping their suffering

This a million times over.

It's so hard to let them go but we must ❤️

Lesina · 07/08/2023 20:28

Ah, please do the kindest but hardest thing and let her go. Be there for her, hold her as she passes but let her go. It’s the greatest act of love.

MansfieldLark · 07/08/2023 20:32

I made that decision when my gsd lost control of her back legs and fell in the pond. I got her out but she growled at me fir the very first time and I knew then my beautiful girl needed to go. She went very peacefully. Love to you ❤️

Nannyfannybanny · 07/08/2023 20:35

We had to do this,yet again in January,he was almost 18,a toy breed. He had had CCD for about 4 years,we didn't realise what it was at the time. We'd let him off the lead,and he'd follow someone else. He had cataracts,we thought this was the reason.... because he couldn't see. He was eating and drinking,in fact a lot,vet said he had forgotten he'd eaten. He had no arthritis, nothing physical, for a year,he started barking,then howling and crying in the night, totally confused. We sat up with him
He would walk a few feet,then pee or poo. He was still enjoying walks, but then got frightened by,say a blade of grass moving. Making the appointment, taking him,was hell, but then I felt better. I also had to have a dog PTS when I was pregnant,he was a big, rescue, neurotic and aggressive.

WillowintheUK · 07/08/2023 20:42

It’s the last kind thing you can do for her. Be with her.

countdowntonap · 07/08/2023 20:46

The worst moment of my life was having my 13 year old girl put to sleep - I’ve even cry about here on
holiday this week. BUT it was the right thing to do. We have her the peaceful goodbye she deserved.

Original poster
Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 21:11

Thank you everyone, I have a friend going with me, I'm going in with her, I just hope I can hold it together so she doesn't pick up on any sadness :( xx

OP posts:
FictionalCharacter · 07/08/2023 21:45

Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 21:11

Thank you everyone, I have a friend going with me, I'm going in with her, I just hope I can hold it together so she doesn't pick up on any sadness :( xx

That’s the really hard part, not letting them know something is up. I always concentrate on the good times we had and telling them they’re lovely and a good boy/girl. Then the floodgates open afterwards!

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 07/08/2023 22:32

Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 21:11

Thank you everyone, I have a friend going with me, I'm going in with her, I just hope I can hold it together so she doesn't pick up on any sadness :( xx

She knows it’s her time. it sounds like she’s ready.

Sorry about your lovely dog.

AdamRyan · 07/08/2023 22:40

Jojobear18 · 07/08/2023 19:35

So the vet rang me back ( I only spoke with the vet nurse prior to this) the vet was amazing, so kind and compassionate. I explained everything, I said but she still eats and drinks and she said pretty much the same as all of you lovely people. She said sometimes it's better to let them go before they stop eating and drinking. She said dogs can be very tolerant to extreme pain and often they can suffer unimaginably before we as humans recognise this. She said if that's all she has from life and she can't go for walks etc she would think the same and it would be kinder to pts. She said they can offer other treatment but they are limited and they are not guaranteed to work, she also said she has a few ailments that regardless of what they give her, won't improve over time and will only get worse. I have an appointment booked for Wednesday, I will be with her until the very end. They had a slot tomorrow but I wanted one last day to spoil her. I can't stop crying but i know deep down its for the best. I just hope she forgives me and knows if I could have saved or made her last year's pain free that I would have.

Oh poor you 😢
It sounds like it's time. She's not going to get better, only worse and if she gets worse you will feel awful for not see9ng it sooner
Please don't feel guilty. You sound like you've given her an amazing life, now it's time for a kind end xx

Mmmmdanone · 07/08/2023 23:12

I'm so sad for you. Dreading the day I have to do the same with my dog. Sending you and Misty lots of love. You are doing the right thing for your lovely dog, being a loving owner and letting her go xxx

Dotcheck · 07/08/2023 23:20

I had this with my greyhound. I loved her so much, but putting her to sleep when I did is a decision I’m grateful I made.
I struggled with the decision for months before- my thoughts were similar to yours. Her passing was so peaceful, and I have never had second doubts. Letting her go was much easier than all the worry beforehand. It was time.