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Original poster

When / how did you know it was time to say goodbye

21 replies

IDontLikeMondays88 · 16/06/2023 22:41

Cat is 13

over the last couple of days has just not been right - not eating etc so I took
him to vet. Vet has found a huge tumour on his liver.

has been given a shot of steroids to try and shrink the tumour. I have him
home at the moment but he is very weak and still not eating.

really I am wondering how long to give it to see if he rallies.

it is torture watching him suffer. And just not fair.

the steroids would only give him a little
extra time anyway.

he’s been a great cat and has seen me through good time and bad. Just wasn’t expecting this even though he’s an old cat.

OP posts:
SaxSick · 16/06/2023 22:44

I didn't want my old girl 17 to get to the stage of not being able to groom or use the litter tray last year. She had stopped eating and was losing weight. I just knew to let her go as I had kept one boy on for too long before . Better a week too soon than a day too late. I'm so sorry - it is so hard but you know you are doing the right thing for them.

Groutyonehereagain · 16/06/2023 22:47

When our dog stopped eating and wanted to stay in her basket, we knew. It’s utterly heartbreaking but you have to do the right thing. 💐

MrsSkylerWhite · 16/06/2023 22:48

His eyes will tell you. Cuddle him all night then let him go.

Perry13579 · 16/06/2023 22:52

it is torture watching him suffer

You've said yourself that the cat is suffering so why on Earth don't you do the decent thing and let him go gently and peacefully? The time is now! I'm sorry for you, but please don't keep him alive for your own sake.

MrsCat1 · 16/06/2023 22:55

I'm sorry but the time is right now. Don't let him suffer.

Original poster
IDontLikeMondays88 · 16/06/2023 23:00

@Perry13579 your message is unnecessarily
cruel. The vet said to try steroids and see if he rallies this has only happened over the last 48 hours I’ve hardly been sitting on my hands doing fuck all about it.

OP posts:
Original poster
IDontLikeMondays88 · 16/06/2023 23:02

Don’t need told to “do the decent thing” I am responsible and very caring cat owner.

OP posts:
chipsandpeas · 16/06/2023 23:03

if your asking the question i think its time

chipsandpeas · 16/06/2023 23:05

i should point out i have an elderly dog hes 16 and showing signs of slowing dow but no medical issues and seems happy enough, but i have thought about if the time comes how i could deal with it
he had a eye removed last year and the thought came up but hes accepted that fine but i know the time will come and i cant think of how to make the decision

purpleme12 · 16/06/2023 23:26

Ours had cancer and wasn't eating in the end either and was so so weak. We did make the decision.

I have made the decision for a dog, a bunny and a cat.
Honestly? I just knew.
I don't know how else to say it really.

I'm sorry x

ILoveMontyDon · 17/06/2023 09:55

Firstly, you have my sympathy. It's awful.

My cat is 14 and is going to the vet tomorrow to be put to sleep. I'm devastated, but if anything I feel like I should have done this sooner. She's hardly eating, soiling the house and not interested in anything. She's always been a very loving cat and now just doesn't want any contact. That's how I know its time.

Original poster
IDontLikeMondays88 · 17/06/2023 13:57

Thanks @ILoveMontyDon - so sorry to hear you are going through this too.

I have an appointment with a mobile vet this afternoon (he loathes the vet so felt a mobile vet was best). he is not eating and I can’t just watch him starve himself, it’s too distressing for both of us.

just really gutted.

OP posts:
ILoveMontyDon · 17/06/2023 23:54

How are you doing? I hope you're ok during this awful time. It really hurts doesn't it?

I can't sleep.

Nsky62 · 18/06/2023 00:17

When the vet said heart failure for dearest cat 13

ZebraDilemma · 18/06/2023 00:20

ILoveMontyDon · 17/06/2023 09:55

Firstly, you have my sympathy. It's awful.

My cat is 14 and is going to the vet tomorrow to be put to sleep. I'm devastated, but if anything I feel like I should have done this sooner. She's hardly eating, soiling the house and not interested in anything. She's always been a very loving cat and now just doesn't want any contact. That's how I know its time.

Has she been seen by the vet to rule out illness?

ILoveMontyDon · 18/06/2023 16:25

Yes - liver problems and there was nothing that could be done.

She was put to sleep this morning.

Absolutely broken. But it was the best thing for her. Hope you're ok OP. x

Original poster
IDontLikeMondays88 · 19/06/2023 07:01

Hi @ILoveMontyDon my little cat was PTS on Saturday.

i do feel some relief having made the decision as it was torture watching him being poorly and it was really weighing on me in terms of making the right decision. It was also very peaceful at the end - he wasn’t bothered or upset by the vet which is a comfort.

I am finding all the little routines upsetting eg suddenly I don’t need to feed him any more.

it’s rotten isn’t it.

Hope you are ok. My boy has liver issues too - massive tumour on his liver.

Can I ask what are you going to do with all your cats stuff.

I took in some unopened food to my neighbour who has a cat but wasn’t sure what to do with the rest.

OP posts:
ZebraDilemma · 19/06/2023 08:23

So sorry @ILoveMontyDon 💐

Flustercuckoo · 19/06/2023 08:38

journeyspet.com/pet-quality-of-life-scale-calculator/

My dog had cancer. She wouldn't eat one day, we got her mcds cheeseburgers, she still wouldn't eat. She coughed up a blood fleck, so we took her that afternoon when the vets could see us.

weathervane1 · 19/06/2023 09:11

Our cat was an 18 year old tortoiseshell that adopted us when she was about six. She's always been independent, huffed at us when we fucked up and hated excessive petting. She was also the most honest personable, interesting and wonderful lady we had ever met and we were privileged that she chose to live with us. About two years ago she started going off her food and her poo became runny and smelt bad. We switched to Katkins food which was formulated specifically for her needs and for a while she improved markedly. Then she went slowly downhill. The vets diagnosed her with a fast growing carcinoma and gave her steroids for her appetite and said it wouldn't be long. During the week that followed we fed her prawns and her other favourite foods by hand, even liquidising them to help her eat. One day she just refused to eat and lay in the attic room two flights up basking in the warmth of the sun. We sat in the garden and talked about her time being very close and cried together, but we were determined to do the right thing by her; she deserved no less and we loved her too much to see her suffer. As we sat together, she came down the garden very slowly, almost painfully, just wanting to be with us as always. She lay down next to us in the sun and gently purred whilst struggling to breath. At that point we knew it was time.

ILoveMontyDon · 19/06/2023 16:48

Thank you ZebraDilemma.

Oh IDontLikeMondays88...I'm ever so sorry to hear your sad news. I hope you're ok. It's very hard isn't it. I'm in exactly the same position as you. I suppose only time will heal us now. We did the right thing . I am heart-broken but the time was right and my cat like yours didn't put up any resistance.

The vets I took my cat to were happy to take the carrier to use with one of the charities they work with. I threw her dishes out -couldn't bear to do anything else with them and the rest is shoved in a bag. :(

Sorry to everyone who has lost their pets. It really is awful.

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