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Original poster

1 year old with our dog.

50 replies

Exhaustedsheep · 13/01/2023 22:45

My girl has just turned 1 and we have a 6 year old Japanese spitz, he’s always been a very reactive growly dog, will growl at pretty much every noise, barks like a maniac if anyone knocks the door or any of us come home.
As you know you can’t really tell a 1 yr old how to treat the dog and mostly the dog will get up and walk away if she comes near. Though recently she only has to crawl in the direction of where the dogs sat, usually on the sofa, and he will start growling at her. We only live in a small space so she can get to him easy. I always removed her immediately but I’m still worried as he’s such a reactive dog one day he might do something before I can move her. Any thoughts or advice. Am I overthinking this.

OP posts:
Original poster
Exhaustedsheep · 14/01/2023 00:18

I’m not going to lie we only ever argue about the dog, I think I felt like maybe I was overthinking it because anytime I say anything to me partner about the dog’s behaviour I get shot down and told I’m stupid as I’ve never owned a dog before.
I’m glad I’m not stupid though as I thought we had a big issue. He’s freely admitted if he had to chose to save us or the dog he’d chose the dog. This is what I’m battling with.
I did animal behaviour back in my days at college and he’s never listened to a word I’ve said, even when a behaviourist has basically repeated what I have said.
I think for my child’s safety I better stand up to the Partner better.

OP posts:
Nicecow · 14/01/2023 00:25

Get rid of the dog

Ohgodthepain · 14/01/2023 00:27

Get rid of your partner and the dog

Aquamarine1029 · 14/01/2023 00:32

He’s freely admitted if he had to chose to save us or the dog he’d chose the dog.

JFC I can't believe you're sharing your life with such a selfish, stupid man. This is a recipe for disaster. Your baby is at very serious risk.

nocoolnamesleft · 14/01/2023 01:24

Get rid of the partner (and the dog).

Ihaventgottimeforthis · 14/01/2023 01:32

Holy shit get rid of your boyfriend AND his dog then.

villainousbroodmare · 14/01/2023 01:36

That dog will sink his teeth into your tiny child one day very soon. Then you'll be making your decisions through a blur of tears in a hospital instead of now, at home. Your partner is an absolute dick btw. So sorry for you, but have sense and get your baby out of there.

MoscowMules · 14/01/2023 01:47

Then him and the dog can go and keep eachother warm 🤦🏻‍♀️

What fucking man puts a dog over his baby!

I come from a military background, late DH was a military man. We had friends on camp. I remember the day one of the wives dogs growled at their toddler, he arrived home later that evening to find the dog locked out in the rain in the back garden, he asked why the dog was out the back, she said it growled at the bairn (baby), it's got to go.

We were in the living room with the wife when it did it. Kid was nowhere near the dog, just playing with those toot toot cars that talk on the other side of the room, the dog just started growling and snarling at the kid for no reason.

Next day dog gone. Not sure where/how. But dog gone. That was one incident, never mind a few times.

To be fair this wife was formidable and I think had he not done anything him and the dog would be sleeping in the back garden in the rain indefinitely 🤣

PartySock · 14/01/2023 01:55

Is your partner your daughters dad? If so, his priorities are very, very wrong and I would seriously worry about leaving him with dog and child alone if you ever split.
That aside, as pp's have said, dog needs to go, with or without partner.

BubziOwl · 14/01/2023 06:42

Your partner sounds like an idiot. You need to stand up for yourself and your baby here, do not let him bully you into backing down.

He clearly doesn't know as much about dogs as he thinks he does, and honestly any man who said they cared more about their dog than me, let alone our child, would be gone before teatime.

drintrouble · 14/01/2023 08:06

My friend's son was bitten by her 'timid' dog in the face. She can not forgive herself for that. You need to keep them apart or get rid of the dog altogether.

BertieBotts · 14/01/2023 08:10

Rehome the partner and hope he takes the dog? Grin

No but really. This would probably be a good approach but my guess is your partner won't stick to it - I think this is a recipe for disaster unfortunately.

babysafedogtraining.com/mamas-dont-let-your-babies-get-magnetized-to-dogs/

Hoppinggreen · 14/01/2023 08:13

You need to get rid of one of them!
What did you think would happen when you brought a baby into a house where there is a reactive dog? It sounds like you already knew your dog had issues so what was your plan to manage it?
The dog sounds unhappy and your child is probably in danger

crisscrosscringle · 14/01/2023 08:19

MoscowMules · 14/01/2023 01:47

Then him and the dog can go and keep eachother warm 🤦🏻‍♀️

What fucking man puts a dog over his baby!

I come from a military background, late DH was a military man. We had friends on camp. I remember the day one of the wives dogs growled at their toddler, he arrived home later that evening to find the dog locked out in the rain in the back garden, he asked why the dog was out the back, she said it growled at the bairn (baby), it's got to go.

We were in the living room with the wife when it did it. Kid was nowhere near the dog, just playing with those toot toot cars that talk on the other side of the room, the dog just started growling and snarling at the kid for no reason.

Next day dog gone. Not sure where/how. But dog gone. That was one incident, never mind a few times.

To be fair this wife was formidable and I think had he not done anything him and the dog would be sleeping in the back garden in the rain indefinitely 🤣

That's incredibly sad, I hope they don't get any more pets.

Legoninjago1 · 14/01/2023 08:22

I'd be rehoming hm too OP. Sorry - I know it's easier to say than do. But it's simply not worth the risk.

Twizbe · 14/01/2023 08:24

Exhaustedsheep · 14/01/2023 00:18

I’m not going to lie we only ever argue about the dog, I think I felt like maybe I was overthinking it because anytime I say anything to me partner about the dog’s behaviour I get shot down and told I’m stupid as I’ve never owned a dog before.
I’m glad I’m not stupid though as I thought we had a big issue. He’s freely admitted if he had to chose to save us or the dog he’d chose the dog. This is what I’m battling with.
I did animal behaviour back in my days at college and he’s never listened to a word I’ve said, even when a behaviourist has basically repeated what I have said.
I think for my child’s safety I better stand up to the Partner better.

Time to rehome the partner

sageandrosemary · 14/01/2023 08:25

This is going to be an unpopular opinion, but I think the dog needs rehoming. I wouldn't take that sort of risk with such small children.

ofwarren · 14/01/2023 08:26

sageandrosemary · 14/01/2023 08:25

This is going to be an unpopular opinion, but I think the dog needs rehoming. I wouldn't take that sort of risk with such small children.

Read all the comments. It's seems it's the popular opinion.

Rachaelrachael · 14/01/2023 08:26

I assume your partner is baby's dad? So he would choose to save his dog over his baby, and you?! Get rid of him and the dog. You can't ever trust him to keep baby safe

sageandrosemary · 14/01/2023 08:27

helloelsie · 13/01/2023 22:58

Why rehome, a dog is a member of the family and this situation can be easily sorted with some training, consistency and supervision.

It can't always be fixed though, can it? And honestly it can be 'easily' fixed is misleading at best...

Shouldbeworkingnotreadingtalk · 14/01/2023 08:27

My blood ran cold reading this.

One of our x3 dogs starting growling when anyone tried to get too near on the sofa... he snapped at me and caught my face. . . We let it go. (Mistake) as 99% of the time he was a cuddle monster big baby.

Second time 3 months later - he nearly killed my husband and had him around the throat. . . (And DH isn't a small bloke). ... Within 24hrs he was put to sleep, he was 64kg of dog and the vet said (as a sobbed my heart out for my lovely dog) that it could have been a lot worse and I was doing the right thing.

If it had been a child they would be dead, and reading your post has just bought it all back to me.

PLEASE rehome dog before something awful happens.

ofwarren · 14/01/2023 08:29

Shouldbeworkingnotreadingtalk · 14/01/2023 08:27

My blood ran cold reading this.

One of our x3 dogs starting growling when anyone tried to get too near on the sofa... he snapped at me and caught my face. . . We let it go. (Mistake) as 99% of the time he was a cuddle monster big baby.

Second time 3 months later - he nearly killed my husband and had him around the throat. . . (And DH isn't a small bloke). ... Within 24hrs he was put to sleep, he was 64kg of dog and the vet said (as a sobbed my heart out for my lovely dog) that it could have been a lot worse and I was doing the right thing.

If it had been a child they would be dead, and reading your post has just bought it all back to me.

PLEASE rehome dog before something awful happens.

Oh god that's absolutely horrific
What kind of breed was he?
Your poor husband Flowers

sageandrosemary · 14/01/2023 08:33

@ofwarren Ah, yes, I've since seen that since! Also saw the update from OP about the partner - I'm with others that he needs rehoming too! Poor OP.

ClockCoat · 14/01/2023 08:34

Surely this dog could never be trusted with your child!? You've already acknowledged that something could happen. For your child's safety you need to get rid of the dog full stop.

Shouldbeworkingnotreadingtalk · 14/01/2023 08:37

@ofwarren - he was a Cane Corso (Mastiff). . . We have them as livestock guardian dogs. . (Farm) ... he was the biggest softie ever ... except in those snap moments when he wasn't ... we couldn't rehome him, as the only suitable home would have been for him to be chained up outside guarding a scrapyard kind of home ... and we knew he'd hate that, having been an indoors family dog for so long.

In hindsight I'd have had his balls off sooner, but with lockdown etc the vets were only doing emergencies and I didn't push the issue as wasn't that bothered at the time.

It's put me right off ever getting another dog when the other two (no issue) ones die of old age.

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