My dd's would absolutely love a puppy. Not sure if I can afford one?

[Leapoffaith00]

My dd's are 12 and 14 and have wanted a puppy forever. I'm a single working (part time) mum who isn't on a great salary. I have never had support from their father when it comes to childcare and rely on my mum who doesn't live local and also works full time. The last 5 years have been so so busy as I was at university studying to become a nurse. There was no way I could add a puppy into our chaotic life.
I'm now qualified and have more time (although life is still busy being a lone parent) and dd's are more responsible to help look after a dog.
My dd's have promised to walk it daily and I trust they will. I'm just concerned about the costs.
I would get some kind of pet insurance but no clue what it covers. Then there is food, worming tablets, grooming - I have no idea how much this will add up to.
Can someone please advise me on this?
I am really confused financially more than anything else.

Food and grooming will depend on breed of dog.

We have a large breed. Food is £14 a month for his kibble. He gets treats on top of this. As for worming, we pay a pet plan £11 a month and that includes 6 monthly vet check worming and flea/tick treatment. Insurance is £29 a month.

Unless you want a puppy then absolutely do not get a puppy.

There is no way a 12 and 14 yo could or should be responsible for: sleepless nights, toilet training, watching them constantly so they don’t get into something dangerous/they shouldn’t, dealing with nipping, training them to be good around other dogs, etc.

Food - approx £25 a month including treats
Pet plan flea and worm treatments - £12 a month
Sundries - lead, pooh bags, toys, replacing blankets and dog beds.. I’ll guess £10 a month
Grooming - £35 every 6 weeks
Insurance - £32 a month

That’s just off the top of my head. Insurance doesn’t cover vet bills under a certain amount so the time he needed a few stitches and antibiotics was £85 and there’s been a few other incidents like that.

Puppies are a lot of work for the first year, some people find them more demanding than new babies. Even as adults they need more than just a walk, they need company and letting out to toilet during the day. Which means if you're out all day you need to consider the cost of a dog walker or daycare.

My kids are similar ages. They do minimal dog walking. Don’t believe anything kids say about dog walking. It just doesn’t happen

Also just to add - I see lots of posts about getting a dog where it’s mentioned that it’ll be walked daily, like that’s the be all and end all for a happy dog. Mine has terrible separation anxiety and can’t be left for more than 2 hours at a time, we’ve spent lots of money on various dog trainers to ‘cure’ this but it hasn’t worked.

I love him to bits but dogs are so restrictive and it’s like having a toddler that’ll never grow up - I’ll never get another one.

Keep in mind that even if you are part time, you would likely have to pay for some form of daycare or dog walking. Adults dogs can be left for a maximum of 4 hours, puppies even less. Even if your girls are walking the dog before and after school, they will likely need a visit at lunchtime.

I agree that unless you are keen to have one as well it’s not a great idea. Even though your daughters will of course help with the dog, it is ultimately your responsibility. I don’t think you can rely on them primarily for walking - of course they say they will but realistically the novelty of it will wear off, especially in shit weather, and then there may be arguments. Also if your daughters are 12/14, what happens in 5-10 years time when they’ve moved out, or gone to uni or if they’ve decided they want to go travelling/work abroad - you’ll be the one caring an aging dog. No problem with getting one - but I really think you need to really want one too, not just your daughters - it will very much end up being your dog, but theirs.

It's a tricky one. I'd say don't do it regardless of cost given your circumstances. I have a young dog. I adore him BUT the level of restriction is unbelievable. Walking, feeding etc all fine but the max I can leave him is 2hr in his crate and no more and I honestly don't know how I could operate if I had to work. Cost wise I pay £45/m insurance, £15/m puppy plan at vet which includes all standard checks, worming etc. Food £1.50 a day maybe plus treats, toys, bedding etc. For you maybe dog walker costs too if you're working. Honestly dogs are wonderful but you might be giving yourself a real problem.

Also, while kids help me they don't actually take on dog responsibilities as such.

Do they want an adult dog as much as they want a puppy? If the answer is no then the finances don't even come into the decision. Puppies are like human babies, super cute and lovely but best when you can hand them back to their owner/parent when you've had your cuddles and play time and made funny faces and all that.

Think about the next +12 years of your life and if you will be able to walk for at least an hour a day, not leave the dog for more than 4 hours every day and pay for kennels or only go on pet friendly holidays. FOR 12 YEARS!!! That's the committment you are making. If that's OK then crack on and I hope you find the perfect dog, they are ace after all.

I am yet to meet a teenager keeping the promise of looking after the family pet as much as they promised they would.
It depends on the size of the dog. Mine is quite a large breed and it costs around £200/month on average, walking around 2-3h/day on average plus extra expense for unexpected vet visits for which I can’t claim on insurance because it is just below the threshold for excess, plus the cost of someone looking after the dog when away for the day/weekend/holiday. They are a tie and you simply can’t just go out for the day without arranging dog care unless you can take the dog with you.
Perhaps consider a smallish breed and accept that this will be your dog and you will be taking care of it most of the time don’t just rely on the children.

I would say that you need to consider the long-term. Teens grow up fast - by the time your puppy is 5 both your DC will be flying the nest.

And puppies are LOADS of work and your lifestyle needs to adjust too - do you honestly have time for a dog?

If I were you, and I was a single parent, so it would all fall back on me, I’d be asking them to set up a dog-walking rota now and stick to it for at least 3 months, going into autumn and winter when the weather gets crappy.

In terms of cost, my (adult rescue mongrel) is about £25 per month on insurance - but with a £75 excess so you need to have that saved up. Then £10 per month vet worming/flea/vaccination/heath check.
Then about £30 food, maybe more on treats etc.
So a very basic cost of £75 per month and I WFH so no dog walker or daycare needed.

Holiday looking after varies depending on how you do it, but £12 minimum per day at kennels and more for home boarding. Then leafs, harnesses etc.

My dog is short hair so no grooming costs.

Puppies you also need to factor in training classes.

It’s not cheap!

Thankyou everyone for your messages.
Obviously I would adore a puppy but given a choice (if my dd's hadn't begged) then I wouldn't have one. The main reason for wanting one is I feel it would be good for my eldest who is 14. She hasn't had the best of starts at school and I know how much love a dog could bring. She wants one so much. I can't explain how much she talks about them (has done for many years). I feel guilty not allowing them a pet when they want one so much.

What about something like 'Borrow my dog' then they get the dog to walk and play with etc but you're in control of when and without the financial responsibilities. Maybe even an elderly neighbour that could do with some help walking their dog?

They could volunteer dog walk. Contact a rescue or the Cinnamon Trust.
You shouldn’t get a puppy for children. They can’t commit to the toilet training or exercising it every single day. Yes before school. Yes even when you have homework, GCSEs A levels and start dating. What about when they leave home?

given a choice (if my dd's hadn't begged) then I wouldn't have one.

I think you know that you shouldn't get one then.

The main reason for wanting one is I feel it would be good for my eldest who is 14. She hasn't had the best of starts at school and I know how much love a dog could bring. She wants one so much. I can't explain how much she talks about them (has done for many years)

I absolutely and utterly sympathetise - I was that child. My parents got a dog and she was everything to me! But realistically, although I did walk her and feed her and help train her (I probably walked her more than anyone else in the family), the responsibility for her fell on my parents ... and they pretty much outsourced that to my grandparents all of whom were active retirees with time and love to spare for dog-sitting.

If you don’t have support, it’s just so hard to take on a dog if you need to work and run a household single-handed.

I wanted a puppy, or any dog, as a child. Never had one, and I definitely got over that. You cannot have everything you want.

If your daughter is having a crap time at school, I'd focus on helping her with that.

As a mum of teens, with a dog, I will say: they will adore a puppy, but will not clean up the poo/pee, regularly walk her, or look after her. They will make wild promises. But they won't keep them.

There is no way a 12 and 14 yo could or should be responsible for: sleepless nights, toilet training, watching them constantly so they don’t get into something dangerous/they shouldn’t, dealing with nipping, training them to be good around other dogs, etc.
I agree.

Another thing to consider is a dog is to provisionally make a 10-15 year commitment, most of which your teens will be grown adults who can get their own dog.

Obviously I would adore a puppy but given a choice (if my dd's hadn't begged) then I wouldn't have one.

I think that’s it then. You need to want one, otherwise I don’t see this working out well. Do you have a Dog’s Trust nearby? They appreciate dog walking volunteers, maybe you and your daughter can try that out for now if she really enjoys spending time with dogs. Or fostering? Then your not committing 12+ years.

Would a couple of kittens be an option? Having two together can be great fun and they are much more independent than puppies/dogs.

Our teenage daughters promised everything to get our puppy and have not followed through. Luckily me and dh do everything willingly but it is a big commitment and we would probably not have another when she is no longer here.

No.

I am about to get a dog after years of thinking about it. My children wanted one for years and years (they are all adults now) but our lifestyle just didn’t tally with it, both adults working full time (I was an HCP working shifts), regular weekends and evenings away, kids activities meaning we were out of the house a lot. Of course the kids promised they’d do all the dog related stuff but we’ve had cats all our lives and it’s always me who takes them to the vets, who does the worming/fleaing, does the litter trays, so I knew that it was nonsense. They’d do the playing with puppy (probably winding it up to the point of frenzy) and fair weather walks once the dog was fully trained and the weather was perfect and the time of day suited them. It’d be me out at 7am in the rain, wind, sleet and dark.

Our lifestyle has changed now, I’m at home, the kids are grown and we can plan our lives accordingly. It’s the right time to get a dog. I know you aren’t concerned about the time commitment but I would seriously think it through as the only adult in the household. No matter how well intentioned your children are, they cannot be relied on to do the lions share of puppy/dog care, especially as they grow up and want to spend more time outside of the house with their friends.

Financially, animals are expensive. My cat has comprehensive PetPlan insurance with £7k per year, per condition. He is only 2 and perfectly healthy with no long term conditions but his insurance is still around £30 a month. We had incredibly expensive and difficult decisions to make with previous pets and so we’ve gone with the best insurance we could find. We will do the same for the dog we are getting in a few months time. The insurance for him will be around £50pm for equivalent cover. Obviously then you have to add on food, treats, regular worming/de-fleaing (your vets might do a plan), things like crates, beds, bedding, toys, collars, ID tags (legal requirement), leads, harness. A never ending list of stuff of spend your hard earned £££ on.

That said, you point out that is if the kids didn’t want one, you wouldn’t have one. So, please don’t get one.

Suggestions re dog walking for charities or rescues. The rescues in my area won’t allow under 18’s to be volunteer dog walkers, so check it out before you make any promises to the kids.

Kittens, rabbits, guinea pigs maybe?