Overwhelmed by grief and guilt.

[oldschooloon]

I lost my cat at the end of January , I'd had to foster him out to friends after we got evicted in the October last year , they looked after him as myself and my children went into temporary accommodation ... as I still hadn't found suitable housing months later, and he'd settled happily with them, I made a decision that was in his best interests and said they could keep him.
I'd had him 10 years, through some very difficult times and we made plans for me to go and see him.
Literally a week after this decision was made, they took him to the vets as he'd gone off his food.
He was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer and was put on medication to keep him comfortable.
I went to see him, sat and cuddled with him and got the news not long after he'd gone downhill and they'd put him to sleep.
It's been months since and I'm still struggling terribly with his loss. I loved him to pieces and he was a huge part of our family life ...

Hi, I totally understand the loss of a lovely pet feeling so terrible. It’s grief, whether you lose a family member, friend or a pet and if you loved your cat it’s bound to feel awful.
Sometimes grief can be hard to lift yourself out of, and depression can take over. It’s worth considering you may have fallen into depression over this. The guilt feeling is also part of grief. I can’t really make you feel better but I can tell you you are not alone and you shouldn’t feel so bad. You can and will feel better. You don’t stop being sad but you do learn to accept it.
I’ve been heartbroken many times from losing pets, I love my animals so much.
If your depression doesn’t lift at all you may want to visit your GP and explain that you feel so low and it won’t go away.
You loved your cat and I’m sure you did all you could unfortunately having pets can be heartbreaking sometimes, grief only exists where love lived first.
Keep trying to get on with your life and see how you go, but do consider you might need some help lifting yourself out of your sadness xxx

Thanks Tuttru, I have depression anyways, and it's been a VERY tough year... you're right, might be time to get some help.

❤️

I’m so sorry OP. It really sounds like you did what you thought was best for him.

Let yourself cry as much as you need to.

Oh OP please do.
Of course you loved him and I'm so sorry for your loss. You've always done the best for him. Even when it was hard for you.