Rescue cat scratching kids

[CatHelp]

We rehomed a cat last Thursday and she has been amazing. From the minute she got out the carrier she has been affectionate and loving, extremely so with my husband. I knew this was too good to be true, I said it every day :(

We were told she was an indoor cat, fine with kids. Mine are 7 & 9 and they don’t really bother too much about the cat. Cat doesn’t pay much attention to them either.

The first incident case on day 2, husband and kids were playing with the cat with a cat toy. Fun was over and 9yo patted the sofa to indicate the cat to come up. Instead, the cat attempted to scratch 9yo: we put this aside as still being in a playful mood and an accident.

Day 5 I noticed 7yo eye looking bloodshot in the corner. She was coy as to why but it eventually transpired that she sat next to the cat and touched her tummy. I’ve always said not to touch her there hence why 7yo was being so quiet about the incident. We had her eye checked out and there’s no scratch or damage but there is a bit of an infection.

Day 6 Cat was relaxed and I noted her claws were quite on the sharp side so I managed to clip a few with no issues. She started getting a bit pissed off so I left her, but I was impressed how okay she was to be fair. The cats I’ve grown up with wouldn’t let you dare!

Day 7 I clipped another nail but she wasn’t best pleased but didn’t put up a fight, just tucked her claws away

Day 8 (tonight) DH managed to get a thumb claw cut but cat decided to bite his hand softly, no teeth sunk. We left her alone. Later she came by and cuddled up sleeping next to us all on the sofa. 7yo sat still as she could, perfectly, and after about 5-10mins she laughed at something on the TV. It gave cat a fright who then lashed out.

And so that is it. I am utterly gutted because apart from the incidents above, this cat is probably the friendliest cat I have ever encountered in my life. We couldn’t believe how perfect she was. She’d snuggle up with us on any occasion she could, like a baby, she enjoys our company, woke up to her purring in my arms.

I don’t know I’ve I’m expecting too much to soon? I don’t know if I should have just kept the kids and the cat even more seperate? My own maternal instinct kicked in tonight and i just thought, oh no, she has to go back to the rescue centre? We’re all devastated , hubby is gutted and I think if we could utter any words to each other right now we would just cry, we’re both really tired and emotional. The cat has really been the perfect fit to our family :(

I’ll take any advice right now :( am I being to hasty or is this just something I need to walk away from now?

All our cats have been rescue cats and these are some of the things we've done:

Ignore the cat and only offer affection/touching/lifting if they ask for it.
Provide a safe quiet space, not on the floor, so maybe a box on a table or shelf.
Get a plug in feliway and some catnip.
Try to reduce noise levels, number of people passing through.
Provide toys they can play with themselves.
Watch out for the 'murder button' They all have one-I think your DD might have found it!!!

I’ve always lived with cats and have never, ever cut a cat’s claws. I’m amazed she let you.

All you’ve described is just a cat being a cat. We’ve a 16 year old we’ve had from being a tiny kitten but touch his tummy and you’ll be bitten and scratched.

My dcs are the same age and if they’ve been scratched it is usually because they’ve not read the cat properly. E.g. they’re stroking the cat and he starts wagging his tail and flattening his ears.

I hope you’re going to give her a chance because she sounds like a lovely cat.

Cats do scratch and bite, it's a hazard of cat ownership.

The programme with Jackson is “my cat from hell” my DH watches it and thinks it’s hilarious because it’s what our cat used to be like. You get to learn their triggers. Like when we make the beds and shake the duvet out .... it takes her hours to come down from this high. She barrels up and down the hall biting moving feet and running up to sitting people to smack them in the face and run away. She is almost a year so I doubt it will ever stop so I just lock her out when I’m changing sheets now. I would definitely advise lots of toys but cats aren’t like dogs, they don’t get it when playtime is over. If you take the toy away too suddenly they find something else to attack.Rescuing is harder than a fluffy baby but it’s soooo worth it, wishing you all the best of luck

How's puss after another couple of days @CatHelp?

Shut her away when making beds ffs

Yeah cats are like this
My cat is the friendliest cat ever but sometimes he just gets this look in his eyes 👀 and go all mental
You learn to recognise the triggers and warning signs, and stay well clear when that happens

My cats are the most loving mogs ever but they will bite and scratch if you do something to them they don't want.

How on earth did your Dd get her eye scratched? I've had cats my entire life and this hasn't happened- she must have had her face close to her?

Let the poor little thing settle in and for the love of god tell your kids to keep away from her until they can treat her properly.

Your cat will soon train your children into her way of doing things! Seriously - the kids will learn. I bet your dc won't be in any rush to rub the cats tummy again or to just be wary about sudden noises. And given time the cat will learn that kids are a bit manic and give them a wide berth when they are playing.

Yes the claw clipping was batshit in the first week! I'm a vet nurse and I won't clip my DD'S cats claws at home. She comes into work - I like my arms scar free!

Give it time - they will all find a happy medium.

You sound like loving owners. Would be a shame for the cat to miss out and for your family too.

If the cat was going into attack mode and launching at the children that would be quite different

We had this with our old (sadly now deceased) cat. Three weeks in and my OH found me crying in our hallway because I couldn't walk past the cat without him attacking me. We were told if we sent him back he'd probably be put to sleep for being violent, which we just couldn't do. Best advice we were given was to exercise aversion therapy - instead of cooing over him every time he walked in the room, which stresses cats out in a new environment, we ignored him. Eventually he relaxed enough not to lash out and was a very loving cat for the 11 years we had him. So don't give up on your cat, but teach your children to go gently around her.

Ahhhhh you guys
So glad I posted, I have calmed down and got a grip. The Jackson recommendations have been immense, we are loving his YouTube videos and watching My Cat From Hell every night
The kids have been watching intently and the cat had changed totally.

I think she was also a bit grouchy because of a change in diet from the rescue who had been feeding her donations so we are having to be a bit careful, her tummy had been a bit sensitive.

Very grateful for all the responses, it’s amazing what has happened applying techniques in so little time. The family are all in, all learning and most of all patient now!

Thank you Mumsnetters!

Ahhhh 😻 that's a nice update.

Have we any cat pictures to share?

Here she is :D

She looks ‘spirited’

Glad it’s all working out better

Is she is a beautiful girl!

Oh** not is.

Don't clip a cats claws! Part of its nail is like a finger and you could accidentally really hurt it.

She's gorgeous!!

Our lovely and affectionate cat has died recently at 16. He came in and out using a cat flat. He lay in the garden a lot sunning himself. He never scratched or bit us at all. We had him from 8 weeks old. No need to cut claws. My ds grew up with cat and carried him about with him. Cat did not seem to mind and purred a lot. We have just got new kitten one week ago who is a bit scared but she has still not scratched us. She has razor sharp claw though. Still getting used to our house and can't go out as has not completed all injections yet. We have put her in a XL do playpen to get used to house and she has scratching post. If your dc are not used to living with a cat remind them not to squeeze when carrying her. Let her come to them for affection and do not chase after her, give her space to settle in. Maybe get a pet pen to make her feel more secure as she settles in. Our cat will use dog playpen until she is 4-5 months old and able to go in and out to the garden on her own. We will wean her off it gradually. You should give your cat at least 4-6 weeks to settle. If she is a rescue cat she may have been abused in previous life and so need you to be patient with her.