HELP! Kids want a pet. Any will do but I'm worried about responsibilities

[123RuthieP]

Hello, can you help me?

My son and daughter desperately want a dog or a rabbit or a guinea pig (not sure yet) but I am a little worried that they just won't look after it without me nagging and I will end up being the main carer having to clean it, walk it and care for it.

Does anyone else relate to this? Have you had other issues that I need to be aware of? Can you suggest any solutions? Are there any apps/websites that you would recommend?

Thanks, Ruthie.

They will get bored, you will end up looking after it. Only get a pet if YOU really, really want one.

get them a fish tank and a couple of coldwater fish. Yes you'll probably end up cleaning them out but they're not much work really, don't disrupt your life and don't destroy your house. And they don't live long if it doesn't work out.

Of course you'll be responsible for the welfare of any pet you get, children can't be responsible from a legal or financial perspective. If you do decide to get one please do your research. Rabbits and guinea pigs for example should never be kept singly, it's extremely detrimental to their emotional well-being. And don't underestimate veterinary costs whatever the species. Sorry to be so blunt but I work in a vets and the number of 'children's pets' we see that are seriously neglected because parents leave their care up to the children is depressing. All animals need proper healthcare regardless of species.

I second the fish lol. We got a cat for little one. The only thing we have issues with, is when were away. Also yes you will end up looking after the pet

How old are the children? A hamster is a really easy pet to keep, if they are old enough to be gentle.
They are nocturnal, so up for a play before bedtime, but I wouldn't keep a hamster in a bedroom, they can make quite a racket at night.
Upkeep after the initial investment is quite cheap, and you can leave a hamster alone if you are going away for the weekend.

If you get a dog, get a relaxed older rescue dog (if your kids are old enough to know when not to hassle it). That way you are signing up for maybe a five or six year commitment, not a 15-year one. And be prepared to be the one to do the walks, the vet visits, the poo-collecting, etc.

Hi BohemianRaptor,

Great advice, thanks. You've understood just where I am coming from and what I am trying to prevent. We are on the same wavelength. How can I make them aware so that they understand the importance of long term care? Care to share any other issues you've seen in store with parents and kids and pets?

I think I got my first gerbil at around 8/9 years old. My mum told me explicitly it was my responsibility and I absolutely adored it. They live for a few of years, and I had a few up until around 16/17. I still have a soft spot for them now! I found them easier to look after than hamsters and they tend to sleep at night.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Hi Pippidoeswhatshewants,

They are 10 & 12 but friends I have spoken to have the same concern with their 3 kids aged 5, 8 & 14. So it seems to be a common problem of how to ensure the initial enthusiasm does not wane and they continue to participate with the upkeep?

I was desperate for a pet when I was little. My mum tried telling me and my dsis about the responsibility etc, we nodded and smiled and agreed we would look after them properly. It was all a bit of a show just so we could have the super cute rabbit babies that my neighbours bunny had just given birth to.

After literally less than a month, the novelty had entirely worn off. My mum looked after them, nagged and nagged us about looking after them but we genuinely didn't care enough, especially when it was pouring with rain and their cage needed cleaning out or whatever.

They were neglected and I feel terrible about it now. My advice echoes what other posters have said, don't get a pet unless YOU really want one. Children can be very fickle and I wish my mum had stayed strong and not allowed us to have the rabbits.

You kind of have to approach it like having another baby. You have to set up your life around the pet.

I have failed to do this very well on a number of occasions or attempted to but not had enough time, or run out of answers such as what to do when a little elderly rabbit is left alone after a fox got her sister - trying to introduce a new rabbit didn't go down well but she is lonely.

You have to give the animals a lot of thinking time iyswim. Which requires wanting to do it.

I think the problem is children don't really have the concept of time and the initial enthusiasm will wear off. How old are they?
Definitely only get a pet if you want one. Each species have very different requirements, a dog for example is a huge commitment in terms of training etc and you really do need to do your homework if you've never had one. The 'training' would also involve teaching your DC to learn their pets cues/body language to keep them safe.
I'd start by getting some petcare books from the library to read with your dc.
There are some excellent websites for rabbits/small furries but I'd need to know what species before I could point you in the right direction. If you're considering rabbits however this is a good website.
Both rabbits and guinea pigs have very particular dietary requirements, if fed incorrectly they can become seriously ill or develop dental problems for example.

Guinea pigs have been very successful for us. Love how the chat to us as soon as we open the back door and love nibbling our fruit & veg peelings. As they are vegans, we can also put the cage cleanings in the compost. DH & I got them fully understanding that the responsibility is ours, and we enjoy caring for them. However, our DDs are encouraged to take an active part in looking after them and understanding our responsibilities towards them as our family pets. They take turns to clean them out, and this is a regular and non-negotiable task.

I wouldn't recommend fish, most species can live a lot longer than small furries like gerbils, hamsters etc (or they SHOULD live a lot longer if they are looked after properly). They also need a lot of specialist care and they are expensive.

What about some insects? We have stick insects. They are free to feed and their lifespan is only about 18 months so not much time to get bored. We have several pets and they are by far the lowest maintenance. They don't need much cleaning and when we go away we just drop the tank at a friend's house for them to look after.

Hello everyone on this thread.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR YOUR GREAT ADVICE!

We've gone for guinea pigs because having seen some cats: husband started sneezing. Dogs: I just can't face bagging up the whatsits. Rabbits: breed like.... well....

To help me my husband has put repeat reminders in Google Calendar and linked it to the kids tablets to help remind them that Tinker & Peppa need to be cared for and fed and washed.

They also came up with a great idea to video themselves making a 'pledge' to, "help Mummy" with the upkeep.

Thanks again.

Good choice OP, guinea pigs are lovely pets. Some good info here.

123 you need to come on over to "Small Pets" (formerly SuperFurryAnimals) for all the chat about guinea-pigs.

(I rarely venture onto 'Pets' otherwise I would've suggested guineas , but make sure you know exactly what you're letting yourself in for )