Training a dog to 'not wee at night' can be a little tough - how prepared are you for the odd accident?
I have a JRx who's 12. He can go for ages when he wants to, but when he has to go, he has to go.
He used to want to go out at 6 every morning, even when he'd been let out the night before, at say, 11 or 12. Yet, if I'm at work, (out for 9-10 hours), he's fine!
I've had him now for nearly a month, and I can now confidently leave him in the morning till 7-7.30. Later if needed (he seems to pick up on when I need a lie-in)
Also you say your dog whinges if he needs out. Do you make a fuss of him whinging? Dennis does a dance if he needs out, and only whinges if he's absolutely desperate. My mum's dog used to whinge, but she learned to ignore it (mum used to yell at him if he made an unexpected noise out of turn, barking at postie, window cleaner, etc) Now he chases his tail if he needs out, and again whinges if he's desperate. By learning to ignore his random barks, you should be able to reduce any barking which might occur when feeding no.2. Also, mum's dog never used to be tolerant of kids full stop. He came to my house once when ds was 6-8 months, and growled if ever ds came near. Tried to snap once, and I told him off so much, and shut him in a room (gave him time out, effectively). Made him think twice about complaining about kids. We hsd to move in with mum for a year, and within that year, mum's dog had a radical rethink as far as kids are concerned. He now is very tolerant, to the point of ear pulling, tripping over etc. He's 11 by the way, and a lurcher too, so if he can do it, I'm sure yours will learn too.
How far long are you with no.2? If you've still got a good couple of months to go, now is the time to re-establish a routine.
Don't think that giving him up is the only option. He will learn. You have to etablish who's who, and that this is the way things are.
We were concerned when we got my dog, about how well house-trained he was, and I was always running him outside at the merest noise or jump. Now he's settled into a routine, (PS he's my 1st dog!), and he knows that he has certain times when he can go out. All he has to do is ask.
It's difficult I know, but you have to be firm. Dogs are essentially pack animals, and they need to know that your word (or routine) is law.
Be strong, you can do it. Heck, if I can, you can. I've lived with dogs, but have never had one to call my own. There was always 'someone else' to take him out when needed. Now I have Dennis, and boy is it tough! But so rewarding.
If you want to chat further, feel free to email me jessieparker @ hotmail.co.uk (take the spaces out)