feeling so so very guilty!!

[natandchris10]

sorry if i ramble...

on saturday (just gone) we went and adopted a dog from a lovely couple who lived out in the fen, sat with them for a good hour, spoke about the dog, the family, took him for a walk and introduced him to our daughter (6months old). everything was fab.. brought him home took him for long walks over the last couple of days and he settled in so well, was fantastic with our LO, didnt even go near her or bother to look at her no matter how much she screamed for him to show attention.. he was fab on the lead and off the lead, we thought it was going to be really good to have him our family...

then today...

me, LO and my neighbour with her LO (3years old) with buster went for a walk to the park, he was being really good as per the last few days, so my neighbour says lets let him burn off some fuel and then we will come back to the park, so we let him off his lead and he went good as gold, after 10-15 mins i called him back over and he came back, was getting his lead ready when my friends LO was stroking him, she then turned away and he sniffed her (still being good) however she ran..this is when things turned hurendous (sp???)

he chased after her, (we were screaming at her to stop running) and he pounced on her and pinned her to the floor, i ran over and i yanked him off her and my neighbour scooped her up, luckly he didnt get chance to bite her and she was okay just very very scared, then the dog turned on me...it took every single ounce of my body and strength to keep him away from my face..my neighbour was comforting her daughter and also had my LO in her other arm so she could do nothing whilst i screamed for her to help me, the dog was wriggling trying to get free, and i was just holding on whilst he scratched and growled and attempted to bite my face.. and after what seemed like a lifetime he calmed down.. i got his lead on him and my friend who is much bigger than me took him so i could calm down, blood was pouring from my scratches and i was just in absolute hysterics, we walked home and the dog was back to his 'old' self and calm..my friend took my LO into her house whilst i went to our other neighbour for help, obviously i couldnt keep this dog in our house anymore and his outburst had left me very fearfull of what he was capable off, My other neighbour took me upto the local vets for advice....they said we would be very very silly if we didnt have him put down..so this is what i had to do. the vets were very good and took him straight away and explained it just wouldnt be right to rehome him as you never know if this will happen again with someone else and the outcome could be much worse...

well i have been crying since 4pm this afternoon, i should be in bed..everytime i close my eyes i see the dog trying to bite me..and all i can hear is my neighbours LO screaming and sobbing for us to help her..i have apologised to my neighbour so many times that she says if i apologise once more she will deck me (half smile) her LO is fine, playing normally and was not phased by her nanas dog when she saw him this evening... i just keep thinking what if.im sobbing as i write this..it just goes to show you never can know a dog..

But don't feel guilty.

Why did the family he came from want him adopted.

some may say i did the wrong thing, the decision was really really hard, we thought what about if he goes to someone without children..but he would need walking and he would of come across children again at some point and that risk of it happening again was just to hard for us to deal with, we would be worrying everyday just incase a child actually got hurt or worse..

the family we adopted him from, the wife had become ill so couldnt walk him, the husband worked 6 day weeks and the kids were just not interested in walking him and looking after him in general...

You are suffering from shock I guess, are you feeling guilty about the neighbour's LO or having the dog put down. Neither were your fault and what else could you have done?

i feel very very bad about my friends LO, i just cant bare the thought of what could of been.. and the dog he had settled with us so well and now the house feels empty?

Oh heavens, what a terrible thing to happen. I'm so sorry for you all, you must have been very frightened.

I can't do much to help people in these situations but I can help dogs like this. Had you posted prior to going to the vet I would have offered to find a no-kill rescue place where the dog could have been rehabilitated and even if not would have had a home for life. Many will disagree with me for this, that's their right of course, but it's what I do as a rescuer. I won't change.

I hope that others will learn from your dreadful experience and NOT adopt a dog privately unless they know the owner and dog very well indeed but will instead go to a reputable rescue which assess all their dogs and matches them to suitable homes. Such a rescue will also insist that the dog is returned to them if for whatever reason the owner can't keep him.

You never can know with a dog, it's true, but neither can you know with a human. All we can do is take as many reasonable precautions as possible.

If it's any comfort to you or any other reader, I'm a network dog rescuer, dog fosterer and hands on rescue volunteer. My 2 children help at the rescue too and we handle and interact with scores of dogs as a result, from all backgrounds, some abused, some unknown strays and the like and have never experienced anything of this kind. I hope that the memories of this will fade quickly and there will be no long lasting harm to any of you - and that my own experience will reassure you that yours is very rare.

yh, that bit made me a bit also

but very glad no one was badly hurt, especially any children

why the sarcasim?

i think maybe what i meant didnt come across..

what i meant was the previous owners had told us his ways and what he was like, they had him from a pup untill now (5years) and we were seeing he was acting the same with us as with them as described.. what i mean was you never really know what will happen, no matter how well you think you know their ways, i wasnt saying we knew him i meant in general..

i see what you are saying.... they may have lied to you anyway

vallhala, thank you for your reply.

my first instinct was to take him to a rescue centre which is about 10 miles away from us, we went to our local vets for advice, i couldnt take the dog back to our house untill tomorrow due to my LO being there and the risk was to great, it was a rescue centre in my opinion, then speaking to my OH and friends we decided the safest option was to have him pts, we really wanted him to be part of our family and our LO was facinated (sp?) by him. its such a shame, if only i could sleep im just wracked with guilt!

mrsrhett, i am thinking that may be a possibility.

Unfortunately, nat, what you don't know is how the dog was treated at home or how the owner's DC behaved with him. It's possible that they had done something which caused today's reaction towards another child.

Sadly, ime people who wish to rehome a dog sometimes lie. We see a lot of it in rescue. Hence the assessment which any decent rescue will carry out, regardless of what the owner says the dog is/isn't like.

I was recently host for the afternoon to my local rescue owner and one of his residents. I know the dog well, as do my teenaged DDs and we have all 3 of us handled her and spent time with her. Rescue owner was considering asking me to foster her but was unsure of how she'd behave with cats or around the public. We took her on a walk at the end of the school day as some of the primary children were coming home along the village green and were concerned that she pulled on the lead (not too hard, she's only slightly bigger than a Springer) towards passing DC.

We don't know whether her interest was a desire to play or to be nasty and obviously we weren;t going to use the children to find out. The rescue owner suspected that she wasn't child friendly (I;m not so sure TBH), and thus she will not be rehomed to a family with DC, her new owners will be chosen with all this in mind and will be residents in a quiet rural area. Likewise she didn't come here for foster but remains at the rescue, as although I'm in a quiet village I live in a residential street with young children nearby.

It's this kind of assessment and caution which is vital to everyone's wellbeing and peace of mind and essential for the reputation of rescue and the prevention of the public getting the idea that rescuing a dog is not safe and thus more and more dogs being PTS in pounds and non no-kill rescues across the country.

By chance, nat, the rescue I volunteer for and is no-kill (and fantastic) is in the Fenlands, in East Cambs.

hi vall,

i see what your saying, if i had known or heard of the shelter i would certainly of brought him to you..

this morning i cant stop crying, i didnt sleep either, so guilty

I think this very sad situation flags up exactly why private rehoming are to be avoided. Yes, it can work, but as has been mentioned, people do lie, or omit the truth because it's in their interest to pass their pet on. It is very much like taking on an unassessed dog from the pound - something I would never recommend anyone with kids or without shedloads of experience should do.

The outcome would have likely been the same, but I think this dog was put under a great deal of pressure. He was suddenly in a new home with new people and a baby, and no-one (thanks to his previous owners negligence) had any idea of his issues and triggers. He sounds like he has a massive prey drive (what breed was he incidentally?) and for him to be let off the lead after 4 days around yet more strangers was foolhardy because you did not know this dog. I'd not let a new rescue dog off the lead for around 2 weeks at least. But you weren't to know this because you didn't adopt from a rescue with the benefit of their advice and back-up.

I think you probably made the right decision in your situation, but it's a very sad set of circumstances set in motion by the old owners that means Buster lost his life.

When the wounds heal for you all, please consider going to a decent rescue and getting a fully assessed dog, and avoid the pitfalls of private rehoming.