Sex offenders

[Deedeemaggie]

My daughter and niece where abused by their uncle, the police couldn't question him because his social worker lied on his capacity test (we have proof) we informed the police she was lying and they said they had to trust the integrity of the social.
The detective said that if they were more victims or if he does it again they still couldn't do anything about it.
Am I being unreasonable for wanting him punished, he has learning disabilities and is non verbal. He should at least go on a sex offenders register. I started a petition for sex offenders that lack capacity to be questioned by the police or go to trial to be put on the sex offenders register,thats now finished and I'm waiting for a response from the government. I got a lot of abuse from people who didn't think sex offenders with ld shouldn't be put on the sor, so I have another petition for the government to make a separate sex offenders register for offenders that lack capacity
petition.parliament.uk/petitions/597132

But surely lacking capacity is self explanatory?

OP it would be akin to putting a child on the SOR for me it is inappropriate to put someone who lacks capacity onto a SOR. I’m really sorry about what happened to your daughter and niece and I am sorry that the person who did this won’t be held accountable, I’ve been there except that in my case the person absolutely has capacity and I know it is hard to live with but I don’t think there will ever be a law to say children or those who lack capacity should appear on the register. There needs to be a separate means of managing and ensuring adequate supervision of this category.

Thank you

Some that lack capacity genuinely don't know what they are doing is wrong. This man had the capability to plan the abuse, carry out the abuse and threaten them to not tell anyone.
Before we found out about the abuse he was going out by himself 3 times a week. His social worker was told about this when we found out about the abuse, but she said in the capacity test that he was housebound and had been for years, even though he had a buddy tracker from social services and 2 months before she did the capacity test he fell when he was out by himself and a ambulance was called and he communicated with the paramedics. His sister and 2 of his brothers have said that they believe my daughter and niece but have said that they have to protect him.

Deedee it is a complete head f**k but you need to protect yourself and your daughter from this situation. And I literally mean forget about trying to protect the rest of the world because you simply cannot control that.

I genuinely hear you but the capacity or lack of capacity is not a situation you will have say over or control over. Your siblings/siblings in law will let you down on this. I have had no extended family support in dealing with intrafamilial abuse because there is too much sitting on fences and denial comes into play in families.

You will be able to offer that strength and support to your daughter to deal with this and I promise you that you focussing on that will serve her so so well. Your brother/brother in law is someone else’s problem now and I would massively distance myself from anyone sitting on the fence in this situation. They will compromise themselves on this and you and your daughter will be hurt by them and you absolutely don’t deserve that.

Just to give you a little insight to something I heard just this weekend and why I am certain that going your own way away from the locus of the abuser is so, so important for you to heal from this. I spoke to someone about the abuse that happened in their family, their grandfather abused almost all of the grandchildren. When it came out around the time of his funeral the abuse came out and all the parents (his children) were very wishy washy about the abuse and this has made the grandchildren suspect that the parents were abused by him too.

My friend (a grandchild) was talking about driving some of the aunts recently to visit their Paedophile father’s grave and those aunts sat around chatting after about what a wonderful man he was. That is how most families handle abuse. Ignore, pretend and deny. Honestly it is almost universal. Get away from that, you don’t need it and it absolutely messes with your head.

Some that lack capacity genuinely don't know what they are doing is wrong

This is why your petition will fail. The issue I think is more that the uncle is faking some of his recorded disabilities/limitations rather than the sex offender register excluding the severely learning disabled with no capacity. As you say he’s faking being housebound for example. He’s nonverbal but not so much he can’t verbally threaten your daughter and niece...more fakery imho.

So I agree with pp, dont try and save the world. Focus on supporting your daughter and niece by keeping the uncle away from them. I’d also be going no contact and giving him zero support.