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Pedants' corner
Original poster

Pedantry at parents' evening

177 replies

GooseyLoosey · 25/02/2009 08:43

Was parents' evening last night.

All ds's (5) books were out for us to look at. We picked up his literacy book and read comment praising his use of "the coma".

I was happy to let the spelling go, but try as I might I could not see any "comas" in his work.

We then sat down and talk to the teacher who begins to tell us how good his written work is and that he knows just where to put the comma in "isn't". The penny drops - she means apostrophe.

Dh and I tried not to say anything at the time as she really is a good teacher, but it was really hard.

OP posts:
Hulababy · 25/02/2009 12:30

mindalina has a good way of dealing with it afterwards I think.

CrushWithEyeliner · 25/02/2009 12:33

don't send a letter after the event FGS , I would have just said - do you mean apostrophe? in a nice manner but it is hard when you are on the spot with these things...

KingCanuteIAm · 25/02/2009 12:36

Of course it matters, what happens when he has to really learn commas but gets told off for not using them "but I am using them Mum Mrs X said a comma was ' but my new teacher says a comma is ," poor children

As has been said why is it hard to teach them correctly the first time round? (regardless of age, if you are going to comment then make sure it is right!).

I would ask for the book and take it to the headteacher and ask them to spot the error, then ask them to deal with it with the teacher. It is not your place to deal with this it is her managers problem!

spongebrainbigpants · 25/02/2009 12:47

I think taking it to the head may be a little inflammatory tbh - first port of call should be the teacher.

KingCanuteIAm · 25/02/2009 12:56

Why do you have to deal with a teacher teaching things incorrectly? I wouldn't demand that the teacher be "sorted out" by the head I would mearly draw it to their attention. IMO if a teacher views this as inflammatory then I would say she is a touch oversensitive (to say the least) and I would not expect a headteacher to be saying "ooh little Bob's parents where in complaing about..." in any case.

If it were in the work place a customer would not be expected to deal with the person directly, they would just point it out to the manager and move on. In a school the parent and child are the customer and the headteacher is the manager.

IMHO it is not your problem to deal with, let the people who's job it is sort it out, after all things like this reflect on the the school as a whole.

spongebrainbigpants · 25/02/2009 12:59

Hmm, not how it worked in my school but each to their own.

I was always that first port of call for parents - head was brought in where no agreement could be reached. The head would be very busy otherwise!

Original poster
GooseyLoosey · 25/02/2009 13:23

Gosh - I hadn't really thought that I should do anything and I couldn't think quickly enough to say something polite on the spot.

This particular teacher cannot spell in general. She does not know the difference between "too" and "to" and writes about the need for "practicing" spellings.

Would you lot really say something about this? I had taken the view that it might impact badly on ds and that it would not really make any difference - she is not going to re-learn to spell now.

OP posts:
TinaTuna · 25/02/2009 13:26

DO NOT WRITE A LETTER WHATEVER YOU DO
I take the piss out of ds3s teacher about it and he laughs but we are mates anyway.
You would look a nob of the highest order to WRITE In fgs.

TinaTuna · 25/02/2009 13:26

HOLD ON YOU ARE GOING TO TELL THE HEAD ABOUT A SINGLE M MISSING?

OH

MY

GOD
NO DONT

spongebrainbigpants · 25/02/2009 13:27

She can't tell the difference between 'too' and 'to'?!!!!!!!!

Ohmigod!

No wonder some of the children reaching my Y6 class didn't have a clue about grammar if this is what they were (not) being taught!

I'm horrified - and speechless .

KingCanuteIAm · 25/02/2009 13:27

Why can't she re-learn now? I have dreadful spelling but I make it a point to attempt to retrain myself at all times, when I spellcheck I don't just click change I look at the word, where I went wrong and try to memorise for next time. When I read I puase on words I know I would probably have got wrong and try to memorise them. I can't believe that you would let this pass - especially if it is as you say and not just limited to one incident.

Again I have to say I would go to the Head and ask them to sort it out. How on earth can this be right?

ForeverOptimistic · 25/02/2009 13:31

I am far from being a pedant, a couple of mumsnetters have pulled my posts apart because of my lack of attention to detail when it comes to grammer . However that is quite astounding! It is a lack of basic skills, surely you wouldn't pass GCSE English without knowing the difference between a comma and apostrophe.

TinaTuna · 25/02/2009 13:31

If I were a head and a parent WROTE in about this rather than having AT THE TIME made a jokey comment about it " oh look I think you forgot something to!!" I would feel that although your complaint mught be correct, that you had been petty to make such a big deal out of a small( in the grand scale of things) thing. Especially when so many good things teachers andschools do for kids go UNcommented on.

I think a kid is born a good speller or not tbh and part of learnign is seeing others mistakes - think of it that way!

Original poster
GooseyLoosey · 25/02/2009 13:32

Just to reiterate, I have no intention of writing to the head or indeed to her.

OP posts:
TinaTuna · 25/02/2009 13:33

ok what if you write a letter in and miss out a letter and they write to complain to you... how would YOU take it?!

wastingmyeducation · 25/02/2009 13:48

I suggested a letter as opposed to going in about it, plus I would find it hard to say to someone's face as I come across very smug and wouldn't want to upset, but would want to point it out. TBH email would be perfect, but don't know if primary teachers have that.

Hulababy · 25/02/2009 13:56

Now it is over I wouldn't recommend any written comments about it TBH.

I think you need to do it verbally if you do want to take it further, and think of how you can say it in a way that doesn't sound odd.

ingles2 · 25/02/2009 14:02

Have you got that perfect punctuation lift the flap book?
If so, send ds in with it for show and tell

Original poster
GooseyLoosey · 25/02/2009 14:23

Ingles, I have never heard of such a book. Tell me more.

OP posts:
BonsoirAnna · 25/02/2009 14:25

that you think she is a "really good teacher" if she is capable of such horrendous mistakes. Complain to the head.

Original poster
GooseyLoosey · 25/02/2009 14:31

I think she is a good teacher because ds is now enthusiastic about going in to school, he pays attention in her lessons and cares about his work. Tbh, as I worried about him for the whole of last year when the teacher failed completely to capture his imagination, I think this is marvellous.

He is only 5 so, whilst I give my pendantry full reign here, I am not sure that these issues are of great importance for the moment in the class.

I think my post was borne mostly out of the fact that this does not appear to be atypical and I have begun to wonder if dh and I place too much store by such things.

OP posts:
BonsoirAnna · 25/02/2009 14:34

No GooseyLoosey you and your DH are right. A primary teacher's spelling and grammar ought to be perfect.

IorekByrnison · 25/02/2009 14:43

OP - I find this truly depressing and am dreading the day when dd goes to school and I have to face this kind of thing. I do agree with others though that a complaint might be too much, particularly if she is a good teacher in other ways. I'm sure for that age group the ability to inspire is far more important than good spelling, however much it grates.

Would it be possible to alert the head in a more general way about your concerns, ie not implicating this particular teacher? It shouldn't be unreasonable for a school to insist on basic standards for its teachers.

Failing that, how about some kind of guerilla grammar operation where you surreptitiously drop leaflets around the school containing a list of common errors and how to avoid them?

ingles2 · 25/02/2009 14:47

Here Goosey, I love this book

ahundredtimes · 25/02/2009 14:48

I don't think it matters particularly. If you felt the need then tell ds at some point that it is called an apostrophe, though I don't think this is a crucial piece of information at 5. If the to and too thing becomes silly, then point it out to her.

Perhaps it's just something she never quite managed to learn - that doesn't mean she's stupid or illiterate or not up to the job.

None of this means she's not a good teacher, or an enthusiastic one or one who has turned ds on to school - which is more important imo.

I don't think it's depressing. If you are on good terms and the 'to' and 'too' is becoming glaringly uncomfortably obvious, then tell her and she'll work it out and remember to correct it.