Vague people driving me mad!

[Badbadbunny]

Why do people have to be vague when they could be clear?

Like when someone asks a question and the reply is "once or twice". Well is it once or is it twice? Surely they know! Just answer it. Fair enough if the answer is 20 or 25 times where there is real doubt and maybe the person can't remember, but if the answer genuinely is "once or twice" then they must know whether it's once or twice! If they really don't know and it could be 2, 3 or 4 times, just say "a few". It gives the impression that they're trying to avoid giving a true answer and are deliberately being vague to hide the truth.

Another similar one is when someone says "no less than 2" - well just say 2! That comes out a lot in the house hunting programs where the presenter will often say proudly "no less than 3 bedrooms" or "no less than 2 bathrooms" - just say 3 or 2. We all know they don't mean 4 bedrooms when they say no less than 3. It's just words for the sake of talking and drives me nuts.

It gives the impression that they're trying to avoid giving a true answer and are deliberately being vague to hide the truth.

Or the questions are intrusive and too direct and the person is trying to give themselves wiggle room. I can say, "you're very direct" or "none of your business" but others struggle.

The bedroom thing is just a (stupid) flourish!

Fair enough for personal questions, but what really got to me was watching a "going back" episode of Place in the Sun where the presenter asked the house-hunter's son if he'd been out to stay at his Mum's new holiday home often, and he replied "once or twice" - well, it's either once or it's twice. That's not a personal thing at all. Couldn't he remember??

Yes but once or twice doesn't literally mean once or twice does it - otherwise, as you say, you would say "once" or "twice". We use it to mean a few.

ONCE OR TWICE definition and meaning | Collins English Dictionary

But A Place in the Sun has its own weird idiolect, though. Saying ‘good-sized’ rather than ‘big’ or ‘It just hasn’t got the wow factor, Linda.’’ I think they hire those weirdo couples from some particularly sinister corner of central casting. They’re always lumbering along beaches in droopy shorts holding hands and saying exactly the same thing.

Yes I tend to associate this with people being a bit vague and not committal, perhaps not wanting to give too much away, particularly if the thing they are being asked is something they might be embarrassed about or are trying to downplay! Eg

’have you ever told a white lie?’ The answer is yes but you aren’t going to say ‘yes, six times in my life’ so you might say ‘maybe once or twice’. Same with stuff like ‘have you ever had a one night stand?’ or ‘did you ever pinch something from a sweet shop?’.
I do agree it’s a bit silly when the answer is straightforward and unambiguous. Obviously someone knows if they’ve visited a holiday home once or twice! Perhaps it’s actually ten times and they are trying to be modest! Or they haven’t visited at all and don’t want to sound silly or cause an awkward moment.
I might have said it the odd time when I genuinely can’t remember, because it was long time ago and/or was something mundane and not particularly memorable.

Regarding the 1st point, I sell on vinted and I want to be factual, so for example, I know I wore the dress once, I remember the event, but I have owned the dress for 2 years and can't honestly say I definitely haven't worn it more than once. On those occasions I say "once or twice". Now that I know it's vague, I will stop and just say "once"!

Not to mention the 'place in the country' types who've got a laundry list of health conditions between them but have decided it would be smart to move 300 miles away from the nearest hospital and farm alligators...

It's an accepted convention rather than an answer to a question. What they're trying to say is that they have done something, but not frequently, regularly, or as a routine activity. It's a bit like when someone asks how you are, the expected answer is 'fine' or 'good', rather than 'the second toe on my left foot feels a bit itchy'.

Not quite the same but I hate when people say “at most” or “at least”, “no more than” etc and then give a range.

”It will be at most 20-25 people”. So… at most 25 people then.

What kind of questions are you asking that people are evading ?

Well, as posted upthread, a TV presenter asking a woman's son how many times he'd been out to stay at his Mum's holiday home, getting the answer "once or twice" - well is it once, or is it twice - surely he knows!

But with my business/work too. It's accountancy/tax, so heavily detail specific. I ask how many "business miles" so that I can make a claim in the tax return, and get an answer of something like "one or two thousand" - completely bloody useless. Or I ask how much they were owed by customers at the year end, and they say "a few thousand" - again completely bloody useless.

I understand that if you ask someone how many men/women they've slept with, then you're likely to get a vague/evasive answer, moreso because it's none of your business, but when it's something factual where an accurate answer is something readily easy to get and say, I just don't understand the "glibness" of someone saying "once or twice" or "a few" etc.

I think your work requires you to be absolutely literal on amounts and numbers, but most people don’t use language like that in casual conversation. Are you generally quite literal? Because I think you’re misunderstanding the usage of ‘no less than’ in your OP. It’s an idiom used to convey that the amount of bathrooms or bedrooms or whatever is larger than might be expected, and suggests surprise or admiration.

I imagine that in the example you gave the guy didn’t want to specify that he hadn’t visited at all, or only once, in all the time his mother had had the holiday home, or to say he’d been fifty times. One looks neglectful, the other exploitative. So he was cagey. It’s not that he doesn’t know how often he’s visited. He’s giving a ‘safe’, non-specific reply, which only conveys that he has visited. He’s not on oath before a judge!

Another similar one is when someone says "no less than 2" It's no fewer than 2.
Have you considered not watching daytime tv?

I would personally find that annoying too - re the professional tax question. You need specific detail.

”Once or twice” doesn’t mean one or two precisely. It means “a few”, less than “several”. You’re taking it too literally.

But with my business/work too. It's accountancy/tax, so heavily detail specific. I ask how many "business miles" so that I can make a claim in the tax return, and get an answer of something like "one or two thousand" - completely bloody useless. Or I ask how much they were owed by customers at the year end, and they say "a few thousand" - again completely bloody useless.
It's not comparable.

It's just words for the sake of talking and drives me nuts. It's a tv show. It's chatter not an interrogation.