Stop saying sorry when you mean excuse me!

[AndreaMarvell]

These examples are only from yesterday and today. Why do so many people do this?

Sorry can I pass you please?
Sorry I just need to get the milk (at a break at a conference yesterday)
Sorry I need to open the door
Sorry I need to ask you a question
Sorry I need to get off the bus

Nobody had upset or inconvenienced anyone so they had nothing to be sorry about! When did this start? I have only noticed it in the last two or three years.

Just stop it! It's becoming the new "Can I get?"

But in your examples they are inconveniencing the other person as they are asking them to move out of the way.

They weren't though. It's perfectly normal to get up and pass someone on say the bus or the train. I wouldn't see it as an inconvenience and I wouldn't expect someone to apologise to me for it.

Getting the milk and a spoon - it was me they said it to. They were standing on the other side of the table katy-cornered, so no inconvenience at all.

Asking a question isn't an inconvenience, most of the time. If they asked me to lend them money then yes it would be.

I think it is just a habit and people think they are being polite.

But it means the same thing really, doesn't it? To excuse is to forgive.

Do we actually have a word that means "shift your arse" only politely?

It's like the insistence on using the verb that means there is the possibility of doing something rather than you have the ability to do something, in order to obtain permission to do something. It's completely arbitrary and yet gets knickers twisted like nothing else.

(edited because I made a cut and paste error)

This use of 'sorry' has been very common for as long as I can remember. There is nothing wrong with it at all. It means something like "sorry to impose on you by addressing you and asking for your cooperation." It is perfectly standard politeness.

It is completely interchangeable with "excuse me" in these situations.

Pedants' Corner is getting weirder and weirder in its efforts to find other people in the wrong.

How can we all stop saying it? If you're British, it is your word for all eventualities. How can you have only just noticed this OP?

For example

Sorry that I just stood on your foot. OR
Sorry that my foot was under your foot when you stood on it.

Nobody had upset or inconvenienced anyone so they had nothing to be sorry about!

Well, sure, but you could equally say there was nothing for which they had to be excused. These are both just conventional ways of expressing respect and courtesy when making a request.

Some folk have an unfortunate habit of turning 'Scuse me' into a 'Get Out Of The Way' order as they barge past, so on the whole I prefer it if they say sorry first.

It's shorthand for "sorry to bother you", surely? Which means the same thing as "excuse me". This is just how language naturally changes over time and has done forever.

It's short for "sorry to interrupt whatever you are doing/the conversation you are having/your day dream, please can I get past you to the milk". I use it interchangeably with excuse me.

How can we all stop saying it? If you're British, it is your word for all eventualities. How can you have only just noticed this OP?
This.

Why did you start the thread, @AndreaMarvell ?

I'm sorry, why did you start this thread?

I'm more interested to know what katy-cornered means @AndreaMarvell or is it a typo as can't find on Google ?

@butterpuffed , Kitty-corner vs. Catty-corner – What’s the Difference? - Writing Explained

Are we really criticising people for just trying to be polite?

Thanks for the explanation, I've not heard of either.

I'm one of those people that says sorry when I want to get past someone in a shop. I have done for years. No idea where it came from but I've always been a very polite person anyway.

It might be irritating OP but it beats the 'COMING THROUGH' I've had rudely yelled at me by people coming up behind me on bicycles when walking on a local shared path - shared by walkers and cyclists - and yes, I always keep to one side.

I hoped this was a more pressing concern, such as people saying “sorry but …” and it becomes immediately clear they aren’t in the slightest bit sorry for their inevitably obnoxious opinion.

I just say excuse me, please. I'm not sorry for going about my business! Unless I accidentally knocked them flying or stood on their foot or something, then I would apologise.

What is the material difference in this context between saying sorry and asking to be excused? Surely you don't need to be excused any more than you need to feel sorry?

Ah, maybe that's the answer next time someone is standing in my way at the supermarket. If I kick them in the shins I'll then have a valid reason to use the word sorry, which I'm currently not using as an apology for asking them to move😂

Well no, you wouldn't barge past someone and knock them out of the way to get to where you wanted, would you? THAT would be a good example of having to say sorry. But you would ask them politely to "excuse [you]" so you don't do the above, and don't have to say sorry.

It is very British to say sorry when one has nothing about which to be sorry.

It’s the “sorry” as in “sorry, but I am now being a rude fucker by reaching across you/invading your personal space in supermarket because that’s what I do” that pisses me off. It’s always certain entitled type too.

That’s me when idiots dither in public doorways and at the end of escalators where you know other people are waiting to get through. They will get an “excuse me please” in a tone from me. Honestly, consideration and spacial awareness seem to be becoming less common.

yes, but what are you asking them to excuse? What have you done that needs excusing?