Headmaster's welcome from a website.

[Caroline1852]

"Visitors to the school are struck by the disciplined yet caring atmosphere and the mature relationships between pupils and all who work and live in its attractive grounds. There is a sense of real purpose and harmony based on Christian principles and our traditions, and revealed in such personal qualities as consideration, service and endeavour."

Dear Pedants, please tell me what is wrong with the above.

Ok, I just wrote 'Christian principles' is correct, then went back & put 'The phrase' in front of it, in case someone told me it should be Christian principles are correct....

I am .
(Still not sure about full stops after emoticons.)

The biggest fault is that the writer can't stop adding things. That's why "and" is his most popular word.

There is also a grammatical error in the second sentence.

"There is a sense of real purpose and harmony based on Christian principles and our traditions, and revealed in such personal qualities as consideration, service and endeavour."

It's another "and" that is the problem. Replace "and revealed" with "which is revealed" and it passes as a grammatical sentence, but not one that's worth reading. The whole thing is blather.

It is horrible isn't it? Makes really difficult reading.

Sounds a dangerous place to visit, if visitors are continually struck by all who work and live in its attractive grounds.

I have a mental image of the local rabbits flying through the air and hitting the visitors on the head.