What do you at your school for Birthdays

[BlueberryPancake]

I'm sure this has been discussed before but I would like to know what is the normal/accepted thing to do with the children in your DS/DD class at school.

This is a genuine question. My DS is 4 on Friday, and so far he has been invited to two birthday parties from classmates who have invited everyone in the class.

It was another child's birthday today and her parents asked the teacher to distribute a small book to each child.

Now, I don't want to get political about this, but I just can't afford to invite everyone to DS' party, or to distribute a small present/bag to all the kids in his class. Not this year, not next year, not ever(unless I have a winning lottery ticket).

Also, a collection has been arranged by one of the parents for the kids who invited everyone to their birthday. I didn't give anything. If you give £5 per kid per birthday, and let's say there's 15 kids that's £75, and I will have two children in that school. Am I a scrooge if I don't give anything?

We have invited 3 children from his class, the three children he always mentions at home that he plays with and likes the most. I don't expect a present from them, but if they invite DS I will get a small present for them.

What do you do at your school? What is the 'norm'?

Thanks!!

Each to their own I think. We have some families who have lavish parties every year and others who never bother at all. Don't think anyone worries too much about who does what.
Your little party will probably be much more special than the umpteenth soft-play-for-thirty party.

I have had exactly the same conversation with my friends! Liliputlady is right, everyone says that their kids get so mnay presents it really doesn't matter if some people don't give, i'm sure the mum isn't checking off presents with a name list.
If it helps there's a cool kids presents website that allows contributions to a present in a child's wish list, so for instance everyone in the class can pitch into Nintedo ds and leave messages and it doens't matter how much you chip in for!

Are you saying that you are not going to give a present to the children whose parties you have received invitations from?

If you go, I think a gift is usually the norm. You don't have to spend much. A book or two from a Book People set (10 for £9.99) and a bar of chocplate maybe?

When it is a child's birthday here it's the norm to send in a bag of sweets to distribute. It makes the birthday child feel special.

chocplate????

chocolate obviously.

Julie - I always check presents off on a list! Then we know what to put in the thank you note to each child. (Also the norm round here)

chocplate????

chocolate obviously.

Julie - I always check presents off on a list! Then we know what to put in the thank you note to each child. (Also the norm round here)

Aargh

Aargh

Well I think the book woman is a being ridiculous and the parent starting a collection (for her own child??) is very presumptuous.

At our school some kids give out sweeties on their birthdays but it is completely unnecesary, IMO. some kids have no party, some have a whole class party and some have a couple of friends over. All fine. DS will take a modest present to any party he goes to, a slightly less modest one for close friends.

chocplate?
phobiccauliflower psml i almost googled it as it sounded interesting...
baby brain can i be excused please?

i was wondering how it works if you have a joint party? 2 boys born 10 days apart having a party and inviting whole class of 30 children. do you buy present for both boys or 1? i cant face to be on receiving end of 30 presents, thats just crazy!