please help- etiquette for a 4 yr old party

[nowwearefour]

i am planning a party at a farm for my 4 year old. we are clear on the costs of the children but it will be a joint party with my 2 year old and we imagine most parents will want to stay to supervise their own dcs. Should we be planning to budget for the cost of the parents entrances to the farm too or is it reasonable to expect that if we cover all costs relating to children the parents will pay for their own entrance? it will probably make a material difference to the number of dcs we can invite.....anyone got any experience of this situation?

It depends on whether you have enough adults to supervise the guests without the parents. If you are happy that you have a safe ratio then I would make it clear that they can stay if they pay to get in. If you haven't got enough adults I would invite all and make it a small party.

we prob could have enough adults but most people i have seen like to stay with 4 yr olds esp at somewhere different. so is advice to pay for adults then?

Parents should not have to pay to attend. At that age, I would expect them to want to stay or at least designate another parent to look out for their child.

Perhaps mention in the invitation that the RSVP should include how many adults are attending with the child. But you should pay for their entrance IMO.

I think it is quite tricky to plan a party which has to take parents' entrance into account. At soft play parties, adults attend free so it is not an issue.

I would not expect to have to pay to enter a place where my DD is going to a party.

We nearly booked DD's party at a fee payng place. But the venue offered one free adult per party guest, which made it seem a far better deal. We would have given these passes to one parent per guest, and then paid for ourselves on top if necessary.

Wondering why you've gone for the farm tbh

I think that you would have to pay. I don't think it is the best idea for a party venue unless they are old enough to go on their own.

I think people wont be happy if they have to pay to attend a party with thier child. Most parents of 4 year olds prefer to stay with them at parties, so I think you would have to budget to pay for them to stay.

I noticed a big difference in how many parents stayed at parties from age 4 to 5 - at 4 almost everyone stayed, by 5 they almost all left - could you do something else this year and do the farm next year when you can probably guarentee most parents will be comfortable having a couple of hours peace leaving their children at the party.

We once arranged a party at a farm type place and as it was a group booking there were a certain number of free adult places included - have you checked into that? It wouldnt cover all of them but it would help. I think you should definitely say that the invitation includes one parent/carer per child invited - I think if both parents wanted to come then it would be reasonable to expect the second one to pay for themselves.

I would expect to pay for one adult per child. Any more and they can pay the extra. Our local farm does reduced entrance for adults attending birthday parties so long as they are pre-booked. You may also find that quite a few have annual passes.

Went to a 5yo party at a farm recently & they covered the cost of one adult per child - which seemed sensible imo. A few mums arranged between themselves to double up (so that one adult looked after 2 kids). If you are happy to look after the kids without parents there, I think you need to be crystal clear on the invites - I would have felt guilty just dumping ds without express permission.

I think at that age I would ask for one parent to accompany each child coming to the party and pay for one parent and one child from each family.

If anyone wants to bring their Dh or other children to wander round the farm I think they should pay the extra entry fees.

I wouldn't recommend taking responsibility for a large group of children yourselves (without the other parents)..it is really hard to keep track of a large number of children at such events.

thanks for your thoughts. we thought we would offer the tractor ride, tea and party games just really as the actual venue and families could spend some time at the farm on top if they wanted to before or afterwards. i have checked and one adult is included with each child so thanks for your thoughts. squeaver i am open to thoughts and ideas but your comment did not offer an explanation of why you said what you said??

nowwearfour - I must apologise for posting and running like that. Was juggling 2 or 3 threads at once and forgot to come back to this one. I am quite nice, honest!

I was only asking because it looked like you were going to have to cut down on the number of invitees and causing yourself the potential headache outlined in your OP.

Anyway, I now see it's not going to be a problem so hope you all have a lovely time.

that's ok squeaver. i believe you. i am sure i have done the same myself. and i would have prob thought the same if i had read an ot like mine. i have even booked the date now!!!