DD was invited to XX's party so should XX be invited to DD's party?

[mckenzie]

DD goes to a social club that XX also goes to. DD has never mentioned XX although I was aware that she was at the club. XX is a lovely child and the party was great.
Does party etiquette say that DD should invite XX to her party?

TIA

I would say so, yes. That's if your DD went to XX's party - if she didn't actually go and doesn't really like her, then not necessarily.

generally yes although if your party is at a play place etc then really only close friends go ime.

No. Otherwise it starts to get ridiculous. Invite people to your kids' parties based on who they like spending time with and how many children you can accommodate. I am learning this now, after much heartache!

If you're having quite a few children then i would personally.

No, not necessarily. If it's the sort of big hall type party where one more doesn't really matter then yes; if numbers have to be limited and there are closer friends then no. Presumably XX need never know there was a party? Even if she does, an apologetic "We could only invite Y no of friends" to XX's mother would suffice.

thanks guys. We are limited on numbers as DD has specifically asked for her party to be held at home (am i mad? But that's a whole different post huh?).
When I asked DD who she would like to invite XX's name wasn't mentioned, even when she'd received the invite from XX. DD will only be inviting two children from the club and I think XX's mum will understand as they are children that she sees away from the club too.

I have always let my DCs invite their choice of friends and since I never have more than 12 in total we haven't always done return invites. If other people want huge parties that is up to them.

No not unless she wants to.

We have had pals to our parties who have not invited us - and vice versa. It's not a problem.

Also friends change - so a good pal in September (for example) may not be a friend by the time yr DS has party next May.

No I don't think you have to reciprocate if XX isn't a particular friend of DD.
If you're at all uncertain as to whether DD actually would like XX to go, you can always double check by asking "What about XX?" but if DD not keen, there's nothing wrong. MY DS has been to a number of parties at which his whole class has been invited but he only wants 10 of his friends to go to his and other children have done the same.
I think you only have to be careful if you're planning on sending invitations to school to be distributed in book bags etc as unless everyone's invited I personally don't think it's right to send invitations like that as it highlights those who do and don't have an invitation. Better in that case to give invitations out to parents/children themselves away from those who aren't invited.

Sorry, I meant school class/social club etc when I mentioned the way the invitastions were going to be given out...

thanks guys. DD hasn't mentioned her at all and I've questioned her quite a few times so I'm going to not put her on the list and keep my fingers crossed that i dont upset her or her mother. Thanks for all your input.